When you first started dating the world looked like roses and lollipops. You were all boo’d up and your sweetie pie could do no wrong!

Yeah, well. Those days are long gone. Now you get on each other’s nerves. Ugh. That cute little way he would interrupt everything you said is WAY annoying. You need a BREAK, so maybe you’re thinking about taking a break from the relationship. Then, you can get clear and then come back to each other ready to love again.

Sounds awesome, right? WRONG. Pump the brakes on that break, chica. Here’s what you need to know before taking a break from love:

1. If you need a break, it may be broken.
Is “taking a break” just your passive aggressive way to say “I want out”? Examine WHY you’re considering taking a break instead of breaking up. Guess what? I know why. Breakups suck, that’s why — and they’re scary. You’re comfortable with this person you thought was the love of your life. What if you can’t live without each other? No matter how scared you are, if it’s time to move on it’s time to move on.

2. You’ll grow apart, not together.
Relationships are built on the little everyday moments. That’s why long distance relationships are so hard. We’re all rapidly evolving. You’re already different today than you were yesterday. When you come back together after taking a break for a few months, you’ll try to communicate based on who you both used to be. It just won’t work.

3. There were probs more bad times than good.
The BEST thing about being in a relationship is that you’re happier together than apart. There’s an old saying in the South: “You can do B-A-D all by yourself.” That means that being miserable with another person makes no sense. If things are gonna be sucky, then what is the point?

4. Ignoring a problem won’t fix it.
Similarly, the same minds and hearts that created a problem can’t solve it alone. Einstein said that(ish). You need new thoughts and a new approach to create a new love dynamic. That can only happen with deep, introspective relationship work and often intensive couples therapy. Do you really see couples therapy on the sched next to your Sociology homework?! Riiiight. Didn’t think so.

5. It’ll hurt WORSE than a breakup.
When you take a break you leave room for an interloper. Now, this doesn’t mean that either of you purposefully seeks the arms of another OR that anyone WANTS to come between you two. However, as you both go forward in the world, it’s natural to meet and enjoy new people. That’s all fine and great, but what happens when one of those people start filling the emotional spaces that your old boo used to hold? Are you willing to CHEAT YOURSELF out of the exciting possibility of a potential love match for something you know is broken? And what if your honey starts flirting with someone new? Yeah. Ouch.

So, here’s the deal, chica
When you decide to be BF and GF, you commit to the person AND the relationship. If it doesn’t work out, it’s natural to be sad. Still, cut your ties and move on. You’re not moving on alone; you’re taking the lessons of the old relationship with you. You owe it to yourself to always err on the side of happiness, baby doll. You deserve it! Anyone not helping you SHINE is just dimming your light.

Have you ever thought about taking a break from your relationship? What happened? Tell me in the comments!

Should You Ever Try To Win Back An Ex?

Catch Us On The Tweet Side!

---