I’m in a serious relationship with my best friend. He says that I’m the only girl he thinks about and cares about, but I’ve noticed him checking out other girls. Is it normal for guys to check out other girls even if they’re in a serious relationship? Does this mean he’s going to cheat on me? Why else would he look at them if he didn’t want to be with them? Help!!!!!
Assuming that he is totes into you, it’s still entirely normal for him to check out other girls. Ever since Grog caught a glimpse of Ug in her hot new leopard pelt as she bent over to cook that night’s sabre-tooth tiger steak, men have been, and always will be, visual creatures. And not only are men aroused by images more easily than women are, but we seem to be more sexually driven than women are. It’s a romantic notion to imagine a guy who shields his eyes from anyone but you, but such a guy is about as rare as Bigfoot.
Because it’s so typical, the fact that he looks at other women from time to time does not mean that he will cheat on you. Furthermore, trying to get an otherwise good guy to repress his natural instincts might only push him farther away.
However there is, of course, a fine line between “checking out” and “creepily oggling” other ladies. A quick glance at a bikini-clad babe passing by is one thing, but a prolonged staring session with your best friend is another. The point is that while you should cut his gazing some slack, he should also be showing some respect in your presence, appreciating you for the hot babe you are. If he can’t keep it classy, it’s time for a serious discussion.
Ethan Fixell is a writer and comedian from New York City best known as one half of comic “dating coach” duo Dave and Ethan. He is also the creator and editor of ActualConversation.com. For more on Ethan, visit EthanFixell.com…or call his mom, Robin.