Alright, onto this week’s question.
Q: My sex drive is low and it’s driving my boyfriend (and me) crazy. Is there anything I can do to increase it?
A: ChickRx expert Evelyn Resh says…
The idea that a young woman could have a low sex drive seems a little bit crazy to most of us. But, the fact is that even teenage girls can feel disinterested in sex. There are four common reasons for this and all of them can be addressed. So, in short, yep, you can increase your sex drive. Here’s how:
Birth Control: Birth control pills are the most asked for contraceptive method by teen girls in my practice. They’re effective for preventing pregnancy. You’re smart enough to know that the pill does diddly for STD prevention. So, condom up, girl! Here’s the thing about the pill though, one of its potential side effects is that it might lessen your interest in sex. If you’re on the pill and think this could be your problem, talk with your health care provider. You two can find an alternative method that won’t decrease your sex drive.
Partner Problems: If you’re having problems getting excited with your boo, it could be because you’re having problems getting excited about your boo. You could love your guy or gal and just not be attracted to him or her. This is really hard to admit and even harder to talk about. But not living and acting honestly is hurtful and interferes with both you and your partner having what you want most. Be honest, even if it hurts at first, and find someone who does turn you on. You’re worth it and so is your partner.
Depression: Not being interested in sex, or much of anything else, could mean you’re depressed. Stress, low self-esteem, and a family history all increase your risk for depression. Most episodes of depression resolve after a week or so. But if a low mood and disinterest in everything that used to turn you on, including sex, persists for more than a couple of weeks, talk to your school nurse, guidance counselor, medical practitioner or any other adult you can confide in. Feeling depressed isn’t something to be ashamed about and it’s definitely something that can be and should be treated.
Pressure: Last but not least are the worries many of us have about having sex thing the “right way”. When teen girls learn about sex, the information they often receive is filled with fearful messages. “If you have sex, you will get pregnant” or “If you have sex, you will get an STD.” It’s rare that anyone who teaches girls about sex presents it as one of the most pleasurable things in life made all the more so when you’re protected from an unplanned pregnancy and infection. If you’re afraid, it’s difficult to feel relaxed and happy about having sex at all. So know that if you’re using a condom and protecting yourself, you’re doing it right. Enjoy!
Finding out what’s up with your sex drive may not be easy, but it is important and will lead to a much happier, healthier sex life.