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Getting his attention isn’t easy–unless you’re a Lazy Girl. That extra fine hottie will be yours in no time and you won’t even have to talk to him! Letting him know that you’re available and interested without having to muster up the courage to have an awkward convo isn’t as hard as it seems. All you need is a few grand gestures, a sneaky attitude, and these 10 easy tips that will SURELY get his attention.
Text The Other Important Women In His Life
"You'll never guess who has a crush on your son!" is a great icebreaker--before you've even spoken to him. You'll let mom and grandma know you're serious about that special someone, not just some totally neurotic crush. No, not at all! ShutterStock.comThrow A Tantrum
Scientific Fact: Guys find a girl who cries irresistable. Wait outside of his class, sit on the floor, and let the tears fly, baby. He'll feel so bad for you, there's no way he won't be spending his lunch period wiping away your tears. I see a real connection in your future! ShutterStock.comRob Him!
Steal his homework. He'll be freaking out all day. When you give it to him, he'll be SO GLAD. He may just take you to Homecoming! ShutterStock.comGhetto Blast
You may remember John Cusack holding a boom box outside his crush's window--even if you don't, it's a pretty good technique. Wait until it's real quiet at night, when everyone is asleep and blast his favorite band. Drake? Yeezy? 1D? Make a mixtape that comes from the heart. ShutterStock.comA Little Witchcraft
Snag a lock of his hair (you know you've got more than a few)! Make a voodoo doll. Tell the voodoo doll you love it. Kiss the voodoo doll. It's basically the real thing, right? ShutterStock.comSerenade Him
Just kidding. You're too lazy for that, lazy girl. Hire a mariachi band to confess your love for him on your behalf. It will be WAY LESS embarrassing this way. ShutterStock.comCook His Favorite Food
Leave it in his locker. Just be sure to leave a secret message inside. When he's chewing paper all of a sudden at first he'll be like "WTF?" but then when he sees that GIANT HEART written in pink gel pens, he'll know you're for real. ShutterStock.comDress Up
When it's not Halloween! There's no way he won't notice you. He'll be asking all his friends, "Damn, who's that fine witch over there?" ShutterStock.comMake It A Crime Of Passion!
Don't REALLY--but faking your own death will get EVERYONE talking. "Did she do it for love?" Yes! The answer is yes! When he is mourning your loss and you emerge alive and well during P.E., you will be his own personal miracle. ShutterStock.comMake A Big Gesture
Put up a billboard ad where you know he'll see it. He won't think you're crazy, just super duper passionate. Who says romance is dead? Not you, Lazy Girl! ShutterStock.comWhat are your techniques for catching his eye? Let us know in the comments!
way to go to get nailed with a psych eval or a restraining order! duhhh. and he won’t think you’re cute just extremely weird and scary.
Very funny…
This must be a joke
what the fuuuuuuck
Haha yea this is a joke because guys honestly don’t like it when girls cry.
haha oh my god, this is great
Don’t bother trying to get a man’s attention. If he’s not paying you any mind, there’s a reason and it’s typically not good so just walk. away.
some of this true one time i was crying and my crush asked me wat was wrong. But stuff like voodoo seriously thats just dumb
a joke right????
See a followup on this at http://www.mgtowforums.com/forums/mens-general-discussion/12853-lazy-neurotic-stalker-girls-guide-getting-his-attention.html
Stupidest thing I have ever heard. Yeah like I’m gonna fake my death!?!
this is so fake. im 13 and if i did this he’ll avoid me for the rest of our lives
I really hope this is a joke..
I was just thinking the same… o.O
Are you sure??
I think he’d freak out
This is really fun and funny
lol this is really really funny LOOOLLL
This is such bullshit. This is what we are teaching our young women how to behave? Let’s hope they recognize this as bullshit too. Disgraceful.
The words tongue and cheek come to mind..
Ya… this is supposed to be sarcastic and humorous. It’s like “The Onion”. Its meant to be dramatic so the fact that you don’t get it means you fell for it. Of course girls wont act like that and i would know because I am a teenage girl.
Haha chill dude it’s just a joke
I think we’ve realized this is stupid .____.
Really funny tho!!!!
People these days >.>