From The Message Boards: My BF Hates Wearing Condoms. What Do I Do?

why wear condoms

Yup – put it on! | Source: ShutterStock

We’ll be honest: condoms can be a little bit annoying. It can be kind of embarrassing to be seen buying them, choosing one out of the hundreds of varieties can be slightly overwhelming and looking for one in the heat of the moment can sometimes frustrating. What’s even more frustrating is when you start hooking up with a dude who says he doesn’t like condoms. Because guess what? No matter how annoying they might be, condoms are non-negotiable, girls.

If you’ve ever heard a guy say they can’t “get it up” with a condom on, then you know what we’re talking about. And that’s the exact problem this girl in our message boards is having: her boyfriend isn’t a fan of rubbers. Since this is a totally common issue, we wanted to see what you guys would do in this situation. Read what these girls had to say and then let us know what you think.

Queendamane said:
Okay, so what do you do if your boyfriend hates condoms… and you aren’t be able to get back on birth control for another month?

orange said:
Ask him if he would rather use a condom or get you pregnant?

echojax said:
There are other options then being on the pill or using condoms. No need to refrain from sex just because one type of birth control doesn’t work for you guys, because there are PLENTY of other types to use:

The sponge
Diaphragm
Shot
Patch
Female Condom

Go to the Planned Parenthood website. They give you plenty of hormonal and non-hormonal types of birth control you can use. And they explain where to get them and price costs.

Our response? Like we said before, condoms might be annoying, but guess what? They’re a million times better than dealing with an unexpected pregnancy or getting an icky STD. Although there are other types of birth control like echojax says, she’s actually wrong because the only type of BC that protects you against both pregnancy and STD/STI’s are condoms. The pill, the sponge, a diaphragm, a shot and the patch are not going to protect you against diseases. Sure, they’ll help prevent pregnancy, but protecting yourself against a disease is equally as important as preventing bringing a baby into the world.

If a guy tells you he doesn’t want to use a condom, you tell him this: no condom, no sex. Simple as that. There are tons of different types of condoms out there, from super thin ones to ones that are ribbed for extra pleasure. There’s honestly no excuse for not wearing them. Your future isn’t worth being jeopardized over the fact that one dude isn’t into rubbers… even if you have been in a monogamous relationship for a while. If he won’t wear a condom, that shows disrespect towards you, and that’s just not cool.

Have you ever dated a guy who didn’t like condoms? What did you do? What would you say if a guy told you he didn’t want to wear one? Tell us in the comments!

 

Is a condom enough birth control?

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Posted in: Boards, Discuss
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24 Comments

  1. avatarkissablelips says:

    I agree I have taken risks but mostly when on my periods. My bf hates condoms too. He enjoys sex when I am on my periods because he knows that at times I will let him penetrate me without a condom.
    We have tried the pull out method several times too. Havent had a disaster yet. But he always has a stash of plan B just in case. Will be 15 soon !

  2. avatardavid says:

    i hate condoms it destroy pennis some times allergy please kind your male partners

  3. avatarmahesoxp says:

    I’m a guy,my gf doesn’t like condoms and I don’t either,we did it a few times using the pull out method until we decided to always use condoms for the sake of not having an unplanned pregnancy on our door step as the pull out method is risky at times

  4. avatarSusie says:

    It honestly depends on how committed you two are. And how much you trust him.

    My boyfriend would rather not have sex at all than wear a condom. And neither of us want that!Lol. He told me that in the past, he’s used the pull-out method and that it is safe. I originally said no way and so we waited a few more months. In that time I grew to trust him and so I tried it without a condom. Let me just say you have to REALLY REALLY trust the guy. He can either not know what he’s doing, or get too caught up in the moment and forget to pull out… it’s always a risk. But if it’s something both you and your partner are into, then it’s something to consider. My bf and I have been using this method for over a year.
    (You should also have a backup plan though. Obviously you would only want to do this with someone when you are in a time/place where having a pregnancy is not unimaginable. ie. when you’re 16)

  5. avatarTaylarj says:

    I’ve been with a dude who didn’t want to wear condoms, as a result I caught an std. I godt rid of it, it wasn’t a permanent one. But still, the lesson i learned out of this is that if you are going to be in an intimate relationship with a guy who don’t wanna wear rubber, then you need to find a birth control that works for you and you both need to get tested. If a guy doesn’t want to do neither of those things then you don’t need to give it up. Kepping it 100 forreal.

  6. avatarSamantha says:

    No condom, no sex. That’s how I got here.

  7. avatarheath says:

    pull out method worked 100% of the time with my ex.
    but choose your positions wisely! once we were in this position where i couldn’t pull out quick enough, i was sort of sitting cross-leggedish and she was sitting on me… absolutely humping me and i shot on her down stroke. hahaha. actually it’s less funny than it sounds, she ended up having to take the pill.
    apart from that pull out method works fine if the guy is in touch with his knob, so to speak.

  8. avatarAmy says:

    i told him that if theres no condom, there wont be sex either. (cuz it not only prevents me from getting pregnant but it also stops me from getting hiv or aids)

  9. avatarEmma says:

    Well, my boyfriend doesnt like using condoms. So we just dont use them, and just use the pull out method. And thats worked for us over 7 times(: So let it goooo.

    • avatarTfifany says:

      @ Emma:

      7 times? You use a pull out method 7 times and you think it’s safe 100% of the time? Ignorance is bliss, but it’s just a matter of time before you’re pregnant. Thats pretty much the dumbest method of birth control I’ve ever heard. Next to just “knowing” you won’t get pregnant, which is pretty much the same thing more or less.

    • avatarnicole says:

      i used the pull out method for 3 years and it worked just fine until my bf decided to leave it in just one time and guess whose a mama now!! anyway i am here cause my new bf went down after i asked him to put on a condom. so pissed.

  10. avatarKayla says:

    I have tokophobia so he would be gone as soon as he suggested not using a condom. no exceptions.

  11. avatarSmeadeceahLal says:

    My friends! You are the best!

  12. avatarSpelling_error says:

    It just baffles me how atrocious some of these comments are. Why can’t any one type properly? I never knew use turned into you and wear turned into were. If you can’t type or use spell check you shouldn’t be having sex. Education is more important than sex. Sex isn’t going to get you a job to pay for condoms or babies. Stay in school! Please do everyone a favor.

    P.S. echojax is not wrong because nothing was said about STD/STI’s. Unless I’m missing something here.

  13. avatarJustVisiting says:

    Honestly, if you’re in a committed monogamous relationship for say, 6 months plus, just bite the bullet and go with your SO to get a STD/STI screen. If you both come back clean, and you trust each other not to cheat (which why would you be having regular sex for half a year with a person you didn’t trust not to bring home the clap?) consider switching to a different form of birth control.

    Dudes aren’t the only ones who hate condoms.

  14. avatarMegan says:

    No condom, no sex! That’s what I say.

    • avatarDani says:

      I agree! If you want to or are having sex you should at least be smart about it. No condom no sex.

  15. avatarBritt says:

    I agree with this but, for reasons I think its a bit unfair. Why do men always have to wear the condoms? Don’t you think that if he has to than you should too. It just doesn’t seem fair to not feel much, regardless if its thin or not. Why don’t women try the female condom and see how much less you feel.

  16. avatarnifedmybi says:

    Soon autumn, hurry to say goodbye to summer!).

  17. avatardat1guy says:

    I’m a guy, just passing by, and I absolutely agree with “no condom, no sex”. I think that’s a great rule to stick by. Even if STD’s are not a concern, I still would feel uncomfortable having my partner take hormonal contraceptives, knowing they can increase the risk of certain cancers. Going by “safe days” feels a bit unreliable, but if a woman has a pretty regular menstrual cycle and knows what she’s doing, then I’ll opt for that. But I really don’t mind wearing a condom.

  18. avatarprettygurl123 says:

    How can I get my boyfriend to you a condom

  19. avatarAllison says:

    Agree! Agree! A million times Agree!! If he doesn’t like condoms I say suck it up cupcake! One night of pleasure isn’t worth a lifetime of problems. As Jessica said, there are a million different types of condoms and if he supposedly doesn’t like any of them well then you shouldn’t have sex with him. What you do during sexy times is both your business and your partners. Both people have to be responsible for the possible consiquences of unprotected sex. Bottom line, he has to where a condom every time. It’s that simple.

  20. avatarmichelle says:

    I would make him wear one or u could always were one they do make condom’s for females.But honey if he does not want to wear one with u and if he has had other sex partners then what say’s he used them with the other people he was with???Be safe and always make them wear condoms unless ur married and know they have no STD’s for sure.

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