Boards
Don’t do it unless you’re absolutely sure! | Source: ShutterStock
Check out what’s new on our boards! Right now, girls are talking about losing their virginity:
dancefreak2312 said:
I’ve been in a serious relationship for a while now and I really want to have sex with my boyfriend. We’re already engaged, so I know that he’s the person I want to lose it to, but I’m afraid of the pain that comes with it. Now that I’ve found the right guy, I really wanna overcome my fear. But there’s always the thought in the back of my mind on how much it will hurt.
He’s very “big”, and I know that is usually a good thing, but it’s not really soothing right now. I made the mistake yesterday of watching a virgin pornography, and there was blood. A LOT of it, in my opinion. So I think I just made my fear worse. I was wondering if you girls had any advice to give me and if you can even tell me about your experience losing your virginity. So that maybe I can see it’s not that scary at all. Thanks.
Got something to add to this convo? Then go for it, girl. Tell us what you think in the boards: how do you make losing your virginity less scary? What was your first time like? Are you scared of losing your virginity?
So, um… what exactly IS virginity?
Don’t forget to follow us on Twitter!
New Quiz!
Mean Girls Quiz! 
To be frank, i always feel lyk having sex wit my guy bt am scared of how it will hurt me and i dnt also want it to result to pregnancy
Condom for pregnancy and just ride it out
im scard to i been datinf this guy for like 7 days and im a virgin and i wanna lose it soo bad but im scard of the pain but all get through it hope you do the same and get through it good luck
You really shouldn’t be sleeping with a guy you’ve known for such a short period, instead, why don’t you focus at school and learn how to spell?
Nothing much i can say 2 u but itc better 2 u coz u r not pregnant..guyz i nid help i knw u can do tngz better evn 2 mi,im still a virgn bt im pregnant last tym my boyfrnd slp wth mi bt we ddnt hv sex the sperm swim direct 2 ma virgn now im 2 months pregnant,so guyz if iz there any1 expirienc dic problem plz help i wnt 2 knw hw iz painful 2 lose a virgn while u pregnant
Again, learn to spell, you sound like a hillbilly
Only loose yr viginity to the person who loves u n u love them bak. I lost my virginity at a young age ( we r still together by the way) n if we break up I would nvr regret it. I feel u should loose it if u felt lik me but if not at least trust the person. Good luck.
my bestfriend has lost her virginity and is always with boys and usually ends up doing sexual things with them, ive been talking to this boy about losing my virginity but im not sure if im ready and dont know how to tell if i am i also havent really done any other sexual things with anyone either?
thank you so much for your advice! Ive been with my bf for months now and he is the person i want to spend the rest of my life with! I think we’re both ready !!!!!
Never ever ever ever look to porn as a representation of what sex is like. Vocalize your nervousness to your fiance and I’m sure he’ll be gentle. Many women rip/stretch their hymen during other activities like riding a bike, stretching, etc, so you may not even have to worry about that. It may be uncomfortable the first time; it was for me, but after getting used to it, you can start to explore and have fun with each other. Just go slowly and relax. Don’t worry about not having a super awesome first time, not many girls do. Enjoy getting to know how your bodies work together.
Though everyone is different, it didn’t hurt for me at all and didn’t bleed until later. The key is to be relaxed and lubed up. If you’re not comfortable with it entirely, waiting longer can’t hurt, it’s better than to regret it later. I’m still with the person I lost mine to 5 years ago, but if things ended I would not regret it because of what we do have. It should be enjoyable! Try not to stress, have fun!
dont worry your probably not ready to “do it” so just wait and when you guys are “in the moment” it will totes happen
Go SLOW. And tell him if he’s going too fast, it hurts too much and you need a break, etc. Be open and honest with him and it may be easier for you to be on top that way YOU can control things.
I had the exact same worry! But, I gave it a shot. Honestly, losing it was not smooth for me. at all. It did hurt! A lot! But, if he really loves you he’ll work with you on it, I promise. My “first time” was basically just getting it in, it hurt too much to actually do stuff. Just take it slow and easy. Be prepared to laugh! I definitely did!
I’ll warn you, it may be hard to get it in, which is where it helps if you are comfortable enough with each other to laugh about it.
You’ll feel closer, probably. I definitely did with my boyfriend!
Use a condom. Maybe start birth control a couple months before you actually have sex? Just a suggestion, I know some people are against it.
Remember to have fun. Good luck!
I lost my virginity to my longtime boyfriend a few months ago. Like you, I was afraid of the pain, but it only hurt when he entered me, the sex itself wasn’t painful. The amount of pain varies from woman to woman, but it’s important to be relaxed and well-lubricated. My boyfriend helped put me at ease, hopefully your fiancé will do the same. Good luck!
Don’t be scared! It seems like you really love him and it probably wont be as terrible as you think! Not everyone is the same…there might be very little blood for you! You can always ask your guy to be gentle!
I’m afraid I can’t offer you any advice–because I have the same problem!
i do to i dont know what to do
I know how you feel sweetie. I’ve been with my man for over a year now and as soon as I met him I knew he was it. I also waited until I knew I has found the one until I lost it. It definitely does hurt the first time, but trust me it is worth it! As long as he knows what the situation is you will be fine. My guy is very well endowed which is great now. I personally had no bleeding but I know it does happen. Just be very open, relaxed and slow. It will only get better! Good luck :]
First off: Porn is never accurate.
Second: It probably will hurt when he first enters you but if there is any blood it will be minimal. If you’re engaged you’re old enough to probably have lost your hymen through natural deterioration which occurs as you have your period.
So don’t worry. Just go slow at first and if it hurts too much stop.
And keep relaxed otherwise your muscles will be tense down there and that will make it hurt. A lot.
Hope that helps!