How Do You Deal With A Significant Other Who’s In The Military?

Check out what’s new on our boards! Right now, girls are talking about their boyfriends joining the military:

Babygrlk100 said:

My boyfriend just told me that he’s thinking about joining the Air Force Active Duty. At first, the plan was for him to do the reserves so that he wouldn’t be gone a lot. But now his mom is saying that he won’t be able to support us just by being in the reserves, so he wants to be on active duty so that we have more money.

I’m so scared. I’m going to be there for him regardless, but thinking about being without him for months at a time just kills me. Are there any girlfriends or wives of anyone in the military here? How do you get through it?

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  • 1980Elisa Gonzalez

    Hello, I am a military Girlfriend and I wear my guys dogtags proudly next to my heart. We met online a couple of months ago and we fell for one another and eachothers children. Sadly he got deployed a week ago but my kids and I are taking pics of all the moments he couldn’t be there and emailing them to him. And he calls any chance he gets. Yes, it hurts to know he can get hurt but I just pray every day and just look forward that I know he is going to surprise us when he comes home. I know being with a military guy is going to be tough but well worth it when he is home. So be supportive and just give your guy hope that way he feels good and does his very best out there where ever he is at to be safe and tries his hardest to come back safely to you.

  • Crissy Snow

    Me and my boyfriend are about to celebrate our one year anniversary. We met at work and one day he leaned over and asked me to go to chuck-e-cheese (we’ve never been yet lol). We soon realized he lived one street away (2 minute walk) from where I lived. So from working in the same place to living near each other, we see each other almost every day. At work we where both promoted at the same time. When I heard he was thinking of joining the Air Force I thought it was in a year or so but two days later he got a recruiter, then the week after he took his test and the week after he went to meps. It’s just now hitting me that after spending almost every day together for almost a year is going to end. I won’t see him for months and because I’m only a girlfriend and not a wife, so I won’t be able to go with, it could be years because of being stationed in another state or country. He is pretty bad at communication so going from an every day face to face to a once in a while letter or call absolutely terrifies me. He promised he won’t leave until after hour anniversary. I’m just worried about how to handle such a big transition alone. After I told him about my divorce he told me that he wouldn’t leave my side as long as he could. We joke about getting married just so I can go with to some places. But he wants to do this alone and experience traveling alone and I don’t know if I should worry about it. Any coping advices for a big transition alone?

  • patricia

    Same to me gals! m always crying Felin like m worthless to b loved n am always unhappy wen l think about him n his always on duty. At first we were chatting via watsup expecially in morning, dueing the day n during the nyts we obviously tlking over de phone bt nw things changed n l love him very much n l dnt want to loose him.sometyms he dnt pik macals nt responding ma msgs no getting back to me wen l left msgs no more tlking lyk b4n m am worried n l told him how l feel abt dis hole thing n he said he really do loves me alot jst he always buzy t work n smetyms l feel lyk l can c him n l mis him n ge kip on saying l mst b strong n everything wil b okay bt heiy ladies is too hard for .l sometimes underst de nature of his work bt l gt me l love n l want to spend de rest of my life together with him

  • Sandy

    My boyfriend has been in the Navy for 3 years and he has 2 more to go. When we met I was in the 8th grade and he was in 9th. I’m now 19 he is 23 and we started dating back in November. I know I have found my soul mate. I never knew that the distance would be this hard… he’s been away from me for 2 months we have 4 more to go.. and I’m trying so hard to be so strong cause he inspires me to be. But when ever I break Down cause I miss him I feel as if I have failed him. He is the most amazing man in my life, and this time away from him is killing me. We skype when we can but it still doesn’t compare to being with him in person. Any ideas in how to cope with the distance?

  • Stephanie

    Can someone give me advice. My boyfriend and I have been dating for 3 years now, he’s my high school sweetheart were graduation in a couple of months. He has told me before he’s considering the marines, but recently he has been more and more serious about it. I know it’s going to be hard and I don’t think I’m ready for it, can anybody give me some help on what I can do or tips on how to survive this? We have always been so close to each other and I can’t imagine what my life is going to look like in a couple of months when he’s gone..

    • alicia

      Hello, my boyfriend is also in the marines currently Deployed overseas, will be in the summer. Yeah, theres times I just break down and cry. my best advice is to be strong for him! Show your support, and how much you care about him. Send him letters even if he doesn’t reply. Do things that will get your mind of the worries. I send my bf carepackages & letters. His been servicing our country for 3years now. And it doesn’t get easier, just be strong and be faithful. Love him unconditionally. Best of luck! If you ever need to talk or anything just message I’ll be here to help you through this.

    • HLL123

      Hey, did your boyfriend end up going? My boyfriend left on Saturday and I’m distraught. We are really close too, we spend almost every day together and when we don’t we’re on the phone to each other any chance we get. Now that he’s gone I feel lost, heartbroken and home sick.

  • Lyn

    So me and this 20 year old soldier met online last month. Well, we live in different countries as well.
    Tomorrow he will get back America for 2 weeks and after that he will be moving to Latvia for four months. Well, he told me he could not contact me when he’s in Latvia and that is suck!
    I ask him what we should do and he suggests maybe we should take a step at a time and see where it leads us. I understand the situation between us but I really don’t know how to handle it.

  • Autumn

    Hey my name is autumn. Me and my boyfriend have been dating for 8 months and we ment online. We have never met each other and I really would love to go to his graduation, but I don’t know his family at all and I don’t know anything about the army base he is on. My boyfriend left on June 16 2014. He is in basic training right now and I miss him like crazy. I am a army girlfriend through and through. Yes it is hard, but if you love him enough you can get through it. Just know he is missing you as much as you are missing him. If you can write to him write as much as possible, but sometimes he might not be able to contact you. I know how that goes. I have not got any letters from my boyfriend since he has been gone. It is hard to be with out your boyfriend for 2 months.. but I know it will get better when I see him next. What I do to pass the time is be with friends and hang out with people in real life. Try and do things to help you forget he is gone for a little while. Something to pass the time. It is not always easy, but if you have a strong will power that most women have you will be just fine! Good luck

    • Alejandra

      I have similar situation and he is going for basic training now.. I’m scared :/