Ask A Guy: How Much Does A Girl’s Weight Matter To Guys?

Do guys like skinny girls

What do they really want?! | Source: ShutterStock

Dear Ethan,

How much does a girl’s weight matter to guys? I feel like I’m always overlooked because I have a few extra pounds on me. Do all guys want a really skinny girl? Do they care about weight at all?

There will always be men who are into petite or lanky ladies, but not all guys want a “really skinny girl.” In fact, some dudes actually prefer a woman with extra curves!

Generally speaking, it’s probably safe to say that most guys favor the “hourglass figures” of Scarlet Johannsen or Beyonce. But although these superficial inclinations are rooted in primitive biology (i.e. waist, hips, and breasts sized for optimal child-rearing) the female “ideal” is constantly changing within our culture. Just look at the pinups of the 1950s, or the stick-thin “heroin chic” models of the 90s – you won’t find either body type walking today’s runways.

Curvacious super-hotties such as Sports Illustrated cover model Kate Upton continue to represent our ever-evolving perceptions of physical beauty. Critics may attack her waist size or weight as atypical for a bikini babe, but that doesn’t keep guys from drooling at the mere sight of her — trust me.

The majority of men may not seek out overweight girls, but in addition to the smaller group of men who do appreciate larger ladies, there are also plenty of deeper guys who value women for more than just their bodies. If you’re patient and you feel good about yourself, eventually you’ll find a dude who’s not only turned on by your confidence, but will want to know who you truly are underneath those “extra pounds.”

Good luck!

Ethan Fixell is a writer and comedian from New York City best known as one half of comic “dating coach” duo Dave and Ethan. He is also the creator and editor of For more on Ethan, visit…or call his mom, Robin.

Are you confused about a guy? Do you find yourself wondering, “What is he thinking?” Tell us everything in the comments! And if you have a question for Ethan, email him at!

Posted in: Ask A Guy, Love Advice
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  • George

    Guys expect to find girls similar to them. If they’re skinny they feel more comfortable with skinny girls. And fat guys should expect to date fat girls.

  • autumn

    i would like to know why a guy would want a skinny girlfriend but ooggle over the more heavier girls??? and not really be openly affectionate around the other girls until he notices another guy looking at me and then he is all over me??? i am skinny but not fit or toned. im confused/??

    i hope this makes sense???

  • Justin Wilson

    look, You girls think that us boys care about you weight, well actually some boys do but if they were any man they would learn to have the brain to open there eyes and learn to look not the body shape for form but a womens heart and also learn that everyone in this world is different. another thing personally a lot of boys like girls with a little weight because there is something hold and treasure.

  • kamuan

    This is how the game is played my friends. I’m a girl who lost thirty pounds, and have a very thin but curvy hourglass shape. I get hit on all of the time now-grocery shopping, walking, stopping for gas, etc.! That never happened when I was thirty pounds heavier. Guys like what they like. That’s planet Earth-the animal kingdom-the real world my ladies!

  • Georgia

    As a girl who is quite slim but doesn’t have a “perfect bikini body”, I know that I would be put off by a guy who is massively overweight or doesn’t care about their weight purely because I find that neglect for one’s health tends to reflect in other parts of their life. I am not always the healthiest but I am very aware of what I eat and I exercise regularly, I’d find it hard to be with someone who didn’t share the same ideals. Is anyone else the same?

  • Toni

    Look, I know the politically correct thing to say is that its the inside that counts, but…when I lost 30 pounds all of a sudden guys wanted to approach me. One really hot guy chased after me for months.
    However, when I was my normal self, guys didn’t look at me. It makes me sick to know guys can be so shallow like that.
    So from my experience, a lot guys are shallow losers. But I will keep looking for the guy who’d like me chubby/skinny. Girls should love themselves first.

    • Nocte Hesperus

      Or maybe it’s because guys have preferences as well? I mean, girls say they like tall guys or muscular guys and no one bats an eye, but as soon as a guy says he likes skinny girls, everyone freaks out.

  • Abby

    I had that guy name tom who is my class fellow but i m older then her i don’t like him because he is always clingy he talks alot but actually he talks alot of girls all of my class find him nice innocent boy but i just like him as a class fellow or just a hello hi i think i m confused in judging him but i don’t want him to come close to me just a fair senior relationship is enough

  • Kayla

    In todays culture it actually does matter I am 240 pounds at no guy has ever given me the time of day they just want to be really good friends or friends with benifits not bf and gf it really should matter whats on the inside I mean I am a really good person and if it was what was on the inside that matterd I should of have had a boyfriend by now

    • robingee

      Try to concentrate on using proper grammar and punctation. Its really important! And it’s “should have” not “should of” – I am not a guy BTW I am female and not skinny. Just so you don’t think I am judging you for that.

  • Kiana

    Okay so like I’m 5’7 and I’m sort of athletic but also curvy. I feel like I will never ever get a guy. I mean some people (mainly girls) comment on my big butt, not that I have an ugly one or anything but some even say they are jealous of my butt and how my body is. A few say they wish they had my body but i dont see why though, i always bring myself down. I don’t know I guess I just never really liked my body. I feel like I have this “you have to be skinny for guys to like you” mentality in my head. I guess what I’m trying to say is that do I sound too desperate or too hard on myself. I just need some advice or whatever.

  • Diana

    Guy shouldn’t always think about women from there outside beauty
    But from there inside beauty us women don’t have to let the whole
    World see are goods I think women should save it for ehen there married .im a Christian but I think women are all equal and there shapes
    And sizes shouldn’t really matter. I know girls and young women
    Are alway worried that there not good enough well if god put you here
    You must be good enough for some reason. God doesn’t put every
    Person in the world here just so they can have a girlfriend or boyfriend
    God put you here for a reason so if your skinny that might be a good thing and if your heavey that might be a good thing you never know whats going to happen in life so take on day at a time and have a little confidence in your beauty. God didn’t make every human being skinny or fat because were all made differnt and if a guy doesn’t like you because
    Of your looks when he didn’t even meet you hes not a real man love women for true love not because not because she has all that in a bag 8f chips she could have aids or something. Guys need to watch out sometimes to because they don’t want to find what seems like a right women and really her plan is to try to make you get in bed and men are very easily tempted into it and the same goes for women. Im a 17teen year old girl about to turn 18teen and trust me I’m not saying im perfect
    I was tempted once and I made the biggest mistake of my life with my so called boyfriend and after I let him go because he used me luckily nothing bad came out of that problem. But I knew that if I didn’t get my act together I was going to be in deep the year after igave my life to god as well as 10 others 7n the past 2 years im sorry this probably
    Didn’t help ver6 much but I want you to know everyone is not perfect. And man and woman have self confidence in your body and life.

    • robingee

      I really don’t think that speculating on “why God put you here” is very healthy; you are talking about some deity that people may or may not believe in. You have to think for yourself. Not everyone gets to have a person to be with, that is true. But for cripes sake can you folks PLEASE learn to write properly and express yourselves well. This might be the first thing you need to do in order to have a fulfilling life!

  • Brian

    Well I somehow came across this site but I guess I’ll give my 2cents while I’m here. Generally as a guy it works in this order usually that starts us.

    1. Attraction which like the article said is biologically in tuned in guys. So lets just say initial impression if the girl looks good and has the good hip to waist ratio then we’re probably going to approach you. Now that doesn’t mean you have to be skinny for a guy to like you this is just what would usually signal us to make an attempt at seeing if we like you.

    2. After that comes personality. Now I’m just gonna state this out there, but most guys I know would give a girl a chance if she approached him and had a confident personality because we Rarely get approached. Course this might be different with each guy but I can guarantee you the hottest guy only gets 10-25% of the amount of approaches that a female of the same caliber gets. If a girl has a good personality and it shows we’re interested. Just like how girls like guys who are confident and funny the reverse is also true. We’d really like it if you could make us laugh and feel at ease instead of having to figure out what to talk to you about.

  • Kelly

    I’m 5’1″ and weigh 92 pounds. I’m pretty skinny, but don’t call me names. It’s just as rude when people call skinny girls names like skin and bones, twig, toothpick as it is to call a woman with more weight fat, chubby, and chunky. No one wants to be called those names. Get over your weight and some judging people by they size. I have a fast metabolism and it is so annoying to hear my grandma say every single time I see her that I am too skinny, it’s just as annoying. And skinny people can have curves too and aren’t anorexic. Calling skinny people anorexic is ignorant because anorexia is a serious disprder that shouldn’t get used unless the person is anorexic. It is so unhealthy and a real disorder. I wish people could just accept their bodies the way they are.

  • Sarah

    I’m 5’1 I’m not done growing.. But I feel fat my older sister seemed to get skinnier as she got taller. And I want to get skinnier my friends eat like 7,000 pizzas and I eat apples and I’m 126 lbs! I exersize and I play softball and swim. I have much breasts but.. I feel like all guys avoid me. Every guy in my school goes for a twig. I attract the mine craft and video game guys.. Never athletic. Should I go for them?

    • Victoria

      Girl, 126 pounds is the perfect weight. Also you should go for a guy for their personality, not their physical appearence or reputation.

    • Halyn

      Don’t go for guys by how they look or how cool they are. Like them for them just as you want them to to like you for you. I’m overweight and I’m dating a dorky boy who is skinny and cute. It shouldn’t matter what’s on the outside. What matters is on the inside.

  • Caroline

    Right now im about 5’7 and im definetly not done growing and one of my friends is aboot my height and she can eat about twice as much as me and sh still super skinny while im chubby.I play basketball and was on the b team and was a post. I know im bigger than most people but i think its mostly dad is i think about 6’4 and im built like my dad who is a hulking man vs. My mom who is 5’5 and relatively tiny.Im just afaird when i get older no one will love me cause they wont bother getting past what i look like on the outside.

    • Danielle

      Don’t let it bother you too much. Most girls that are super skinny and eat a lot have fast metabolisms and it will slow down when she gets older if she eats a bunch of junk. I have a friend that constantly ate and ate, she was not fat but we found out she was bulimic, binge eating and purging. All you gotta do if you’re upset about your weight just eat healthier foods with lots of fiber. No junk. Don’t be afraid that no one will love you just cause you don’t look like a stick model. Somebody will love you. (: