Road trips are like a really hard gym class—they seem like a great idea until the novelty of it wears off and then you’re like WTF why did I do this? Even worse, when you’re trapped in a car with your fam, you can’t always be your usual oh-so-honest self…
She said: Mom, why should Kylie get to sit shotgun, you know I get car sick in the back seat!
She meant: The six bags of candy I eat every road trip ensure that I get sick. Sooooo worth it to sit in the front!
Another Pit Stop
She said: Um yes I have to pee again, Jeez. What, I’ve been drinking a bottle of water…
She meant: Pfft, I could totally hold it. But I’m getting like, zero reception right now and if I don’t download this Flo Rida song that’s stuck in my head I’m going to lose it.
Rolling Down the Window
She said: Shut up Kylie, your hair is fine it’s not like we’re seeing anyone for the next six hours. I’ll roll the window down if I want to!
She meant: Heeeheee I feel like the piglet in the Geico commercials. Weeeee! Wee wee weeeeee!
She said: Daddy you should probably get gas there, I think it’s the last station for a super long time…
She meant: And OH LOOK it just happens to be next to that outlet mall! What a completely random, unplanned coincidence!
She said: Yes Mom, of course I’m listening to your story about that time Dad locked himself out wearing only his boxers. No I’m not texting. I’m just looking at my phone to make sure it’s…not…um, roaming.
She meant: Adults can be so adorably gullible.
She said: Oooo that “I Put the Ass in Vegass” hat is sooooo hilarious but I think I’m just going to save my money…
She meant: Yeah…so I can fly back home!
What was the last road trip you were on? If you could go on a road trip to anywhere, where would you go? Tell us everything in the comments!