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If you don’t want to say, “My first time was terrible,” then be sure you’re totally ready before you lose your virginity. | Source
Ask a most girls about losing their virginity and most of them will say something like, “My first time was awkward.” “My first time hurt a little.” “My first time was sort of weird.” “My first time was okay.” But apparently one third of girls, whether they admit it or not, will think to themselves, “My first time was a nightmare.”
A new study says that one in three girls under 16 actually regret losing her virginity. Sometimes it’s because of how it happened–one girl said her first time was on a bathroom floor (yikes!) with a guy who wound up blowing her off right after she lost her virginity to him. Other girls regret their first time because of why they lost their virginity: a lot of the girls surveyed revealed that their friends had sex, so they felt pressured to fit in with them.
Some experts in the study explained why losing your virginity before you’re really ready is a bad idea. “It’s a psychological disaster waiting to happen,” one psychologist said. “It leads to empty relationships and low self-worth. The experience creates worry, regret, self-recrimination, guilt, loss of self-respect, shaken trust, depression, stunted personal development, damaged relationships and relationship skills. It can also have a negative impact on marriage, should one ever take place.” That’s bad news bears, girls–but that’s not even all of it. Stats show that if you have sex too soon, you may be up to three times more likely to be depressed than someone who waited until she was truly ready.
A few of the girls in the study hinted that losing their virginity too early made them promiscuous later on, but honestly, that’s neither here nor there. We actually sorta dislike this portion of the original article and research, because, deliberately or not, it implies that there’s slut shaming going on, and that’s never cool. Think about it: If you’re having sex for the right reasons–you’re with someone you trust, you both are consenting and within a legal age range, and you’re both enjoying it safely and responsibly–there’s nothing wrong with it whatsoever. No matter HOW many times you have sex or how many people you sleep with!
Let’s face it: Few girls get together with their pals and gush, “My first time was magical! My first time was like the movies!” But losing your virginity should never feel like an obligation, a chore, or something to get over with.
That said, there’s no one way to tell whether or not you’re ready to lose your virginity, and there’s no set age for it, either (but make sure you’re not breaking any laws!). But the easiest way to tell if you’re ready? When you stop questioning and doubting it. If you’re thinking of losing your virginity but there’s a nagging voice in your head saying not to, or if you feel more nervous than excited–then you’re not ready. Losing your virginity shouldn’t also mean losing yourself.
While you may not tell your friends, “My first time was amazing!” you surely don’t want to tell them, “My first time was a mistake.”
Do you feel pressured by your friends to lose your virginity? What was your first time like? Do you regret your first time? Do you wish you’d waited to lose your virginity? Tell us in the comments!
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I lost it about 1 year ago I was 15 , I still regret it. I’m still with my boyfriend 2 and 1/2 years and counting. I just wasn’t ready and because I loved him so much and he wanted it so bad I let him take it. I had wanted to save it for my husband when I got married and now I never can, I let my morals go and as a result i have this permanent regret and afterwards I felt empty and cried. So if you do lose it make sure you are ready and you want it for yourself. You don’t have to please anyone but yourself, you are beautiful and you deserve to love your first experience.
Being a huge milestone in urlife you will always feel a sense of “loss” but u get over it in time. I dont think I regretted losing mine. I was nervous and shy and I am a tad chubby so I felt a bit self conscious. He was my older brothers frend. They had gone to Uni together. He took me to his place to check out his new guitar he had got. I had never had a bf and I had never kissed any boy before. He was a real sweety and I ended up doing it with him that day and continued for a few months after that. He is away now, abroad and working. I like guys who are confident and mature. I dont regret losing my virginity. My parents would have killed us both if they found out. No one would believe we had so much in common especially with our age gap
Yeah I can see how some gurls might regret losing their V-Card. I lost mine very early, more than 2 years ago, on my first date, to a much older guy. He was awsum, gentle and made me comfortable and it made me want him more and more. I fell in love with him and am still with him. It was awkward for me my first time. Just everything like being naked, feeling so shy and self conscious, being unsure and naive, how to respond to those sexual sensations, what he might feel and think when he was performing oral on me were things that were running through my mind while we were having sex. I had the best orgaasms and we cuddled and kissed a lot. He made me feel special and wanted and loved. I guess he being much older made him endear himself to me and I felt so loved. I think it is important to choose the one you want to lose it to.
Well I’m 14 , & I Always Question Myself About Losing It Or Not ( To Mÿ Boyfriend Of 9 Months ) ! Then Everyone Kept Talking About How Painfull It Is & I Dont Do We’ll With Pain . So, I Watched A Video Of A Girl Losing Her Virginity & It Made Me Wanted To Wait Because It Looked Rough ! -__- He (Mÿ Boyfriend) Understood Where I came From , So We Are Waiting Till This Day & Are Still Together
I was 16 when I lost my virginity to my 2 week boyfriend. We are still together but being that I lost it too ‘easily’ to him he’s been acting weird. To some extent i do regret losing it. Now I have to have sex periodically or I’ll feel moody or empty.
You never regret waiting, that’s what I always say.
My first time was with my boyfriend of four years. I constantly asked him to wait, and it definitely paid off. I knew for sure that we loved each other and that I was emotionally ready. It was perfect.
OK im 15. I’ve always liked a family friend he lives in a different city to me and we see eachother at christmas at his grandparetns place.I loved him and was tying to get over him becaause he didnt want a long distance relationship. He has a girlfriend and me and him were just flirting around and decided we should have sex next tim we see eachother. He’s 16 and has expirience but i was eally looking forward to it. Im a virgin and he knows. I was going to buy sexy underwear for him and make my self all nice. the next morning he texted me and said for me to forget all about it, but i didnt see it till the afternoon.all day i was so excited talking with my bffs, becuase there thinking about doing it to. I didnt car if we werent going to be together but i wanted to give it to him. / loose it to him. as he was my first love. i was so excited and nervous. and when he changed his mind it broke my heart. Then because i felt so unwanted i stated taalking to his sleezy cousin whos always wanted me. i sent him a pic of my boobs and i regret it so much. I wanted my guy to see them not his cousin. his cousin was the first guy to ever see my boobs and i hate that. Also my guy just wants to be friends which i ssmart but we always have trouble being friends because he never talks to me unless its about us fliting or doing something oor we fight. basically i lost my boob viginity to a sleeze so i get all the girls who say they regret there fist time
My first time was truly amazing, like in the movies amazing. I was 16 and I lost it to my boyfriend (who I’m still with). We had been together for 6 months and I just knew I was ready and I wanted to have that special moment be with him. He was also a virgin, so that mad it even more special. It was prom night (corny ik, but still perfect) and he made sure I was comfortable and satisfied. I don’t know if it was because I was so caught up in the moment or what, but It didn’t hurt till wayyyyyy after. What was the icing on the cake, after we finished, I fell asleep, he held me, and watched me sleep until sunrise. He’s just about the most amazing guy I’ve ever met and I love him more than anything in this entire world.
Ladies, moral is, if you’re gonna lose your virginity, do it with someone you love and someone who loves you back. Also, make sure you’re ready and comfortable with losing it.
Good luck!
Well me and my friends went to this house party, all 3 of us actually ended up loosing our virginity to lads we didn’t know, but since this me and the lad I had sex with started talking and because we had already had sex there was no pressure to do it again which made the relationship a lot easier, I’m still with him now and we are taking things slow but looking forward to the fact when we next do it it will be more pleasurable and not hurt
Around a month ago my boyfriend, of 7 months asked me if I was ready, I replied no and he was ok with it. I talked to my friends a week ago and they said that it would be totally cool to lose it with him (his a year older) and I guess you could say I felt pressured. I round his today and asked him if he was ready in which he replied yes, he also admitted, like me, it would be his first time. Things got a little, how’d you put it sexually? And in the end I did have sex with him. It was good but it hurt, since then we’ve been inseprabable and he repeatedlys tells me he loves me and I’m beautiful. I love him very much and we are still together. I’m 14 and his 15 xxxxx