Boards
Hey Heather,
I wanted to know if it is okay to forgive my boyfriend for cheating on me. He had sex with someone else in my car and also tried to hit on his ex-girlfriend while I wasn’t around. It hurts me so much that he did this, and he still tries to deny it because he is afraid to lose me.
I love him a lot and I never thought he would do something like this to me. Every day he shows me how much he cares for me and loves me. So when I found out, it broke me to pieces. Now when I kiss him I just see him with that other girl. What should I do? Please help me.
Is it okay to forgive someone for cheating? Yes, in certain situations. Would I advise you to forgive your boyfriend for cheating? Honestly, no. I know that’s probably not the advice you were looking for, but hear me out.
The only time I would tell someone to forgive their BF for cheating is if the guy seemed really remorseful and realized that he made a huge mistake. And honestly, from what you’ve said, it doesn’t sound like your boyfriend realizes that he did something wrong. The fact that he is still trying to deny what he did is proof of that. If he can’t man up and admit that he really did cheat on you, then he doesn’t deserve your forgiveness. All that shows is that he probably doesn’t think what he did was that bad – and there’s a huge possibility he could do it again.
In this case, it’s better to end things. | Source: ShutterStock
Just by cheating on you alone, your boyfriend was showing you major disrespect. But letting it happen in your car? That’s a whole other level of disrespect, girl. There’s nothing okay about what he did. Do you really want to be with someone who could betray you that badly? Another warning sign is that he was flirting with his ex-girlfriend, meaning his infidelity wasn’t a one-time thing. And if a dude is cheating on you and flirting with other girls, that’s bad news so matter how you spin it.
Listen, I know you think your BF shows you that he cares – but cheating on you, hitting on other girls and bringing other girls into your car shows the complete opposite. Of course he doesn’t want to lose you – you’re awesome and special. But this dude definitely does not deserve you. You deserve someone who wouldn’t lie to you, disrespect you or completely betray you.
Do yourself a favor and get rid of this immature guy. There’s a huge chance that he might cheat on you again, and I know you’re going to have trouble trusting him. Don’t let anyone treat you that badly – you’ll find someone in the future who truly does care about you and love you. Until then, you’re better off single then staying with this guy.
take care,
Heather
What’s on your mind? Heather can help! Send her your question at heather@gurl.com
Can cheating ever be accidental?
Can You Trust Him?
How can you forgive a cheating boyfriend, honestly! I was cheated and left like dog… I was suspecting him going with another girl but he was always denying, I felt like I had no life anymore but I wanted to trust him as I did love him… then one day I put his mobile under control, I think it was on ismyboyfriendcheating org, and read all those sick messages and found out about where he was going through gps tracking… today I’m happier and I look no back, but those moments were terrible!
good luck!
Girl I honestly dont think so , I gave my ex another chance and he turned out to be a straight liar and cheater I never I could have so much hate I was with him 10 months dealing with his bullshit I got depressed over the months seriously its sucks im still going threw the pain after 3 months im dating someone else and all I just cant stand the fact I let him fool me and disrespect me im mad I fell in love with a fool and honestly now I feel MUCH better about myself and confident I would tell you give him another chance and if he messes up leave him but if he’s flirting with his ex clearly he misses her and his feelings for you aren’t that serious . Trust me girl if you give him another chance it may be fineee at first but afterwards nope its not worth it , DONT DO IT ( unless he gets on his knees in front of EVERYBODY even girls! )
#goodluck
Instagram : mellove_
Twitter : _mel_love
Follow thurl chick :*
I’ve been through this too . But i actually gave the guy who cheated on me another chance and I REGRET it so much . He still was cheating , and he brought out a cocky side i have never seen . If i could go back i would choose not to give him another chance because I know i deserve better, and i could find better . (: keep your head up girl .
Flirting i can handle. But he had sex with another girl in your car?!?!? That’s insane. Any man dumb enough to do that , Shouldn’t be with you. I would have left him in a heart beat. & if he admitted to doing it, then showed he was really sorry and cared or you. Then you could think about it. But if he does it again…forget him..
In your case I would never forgive him! Ok something like flirting with another gurl is bad enough but doing in your own car! Dude get a freaking life!
No one deserves a second chance in cheating except your husband. In other words no, he shouldn’t be forgiven. If he cheated once, then he’ll definitely cheat again. Boys consistently break our trust and we try our best to love them and give them our all. No more, when he hurts you once, he’ll hurt you again for sure…
I wouldn’t forgive anyone who would cheat on me more than 1… There’s a saying ‘skew me one shame on me skews me twice shame on you shrew me 3 time I’m done with you’
thats horrible! i would never take him back! if i was you i would have kicked him in thee balls then spit in his face. sorry i dont like men like that no one does but still….
I’ve never heard something so crazy! How did he even get a girl alone in YOUR car? I would NEVER even think about forgiving him!
Saying don’t forgive him and let him go, is easier said then done, for someone looking from the outside in. Its like a person in a boxing ring or any other sport shouting punch with the left, not considering the person involved’s history, and what they going threw their fears of maybe loosing the love of their lives, the special moments they shared and the plans for the future they have. If the lady in the above situation wants a solution to her problem she should take time and come to certain realizations, that can help her to become free of the person perceived to hurt her. If someone hurts us its cos we have given that person the power to hurt us.