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Would YOU date someone you weren’t attracted to? | Source: ShutterStock
Check out what’s new on our boards! Right now, girls are talking about dating someone with a great personality who you’re not attracted to:
nicoleplzstfu1 said:
Hey gurls,
So I just went out on a date today with a guy I’m NOT sexually attracted to, at all. I mean, he’s not ugly, but he’s not sexy to me. He has a cute face, but that’s it. The thing is… his personality is amazing. We held conversations very well and everything. I just don’t know if I can see myself dating him. He’s got a good job and two hot cars. So gurls… should I continue talking to him and give him a chance even though I’m not sexually attracted to him? I don’t know, I’m just confused.
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I will answer your question based on my own experience. The short of it is I did and I’ve been married to him for 9 yrs now. Before I met my husband I only dated men whom I was attracted to physically. I remember dating two (conventionally drop dead handsome) men and they both turned out to be jerks and players. My (now) husband was actually not my “type in terms of physical appearance alone and if I had seen him in a room without actually meeting him I wouldn’t have even given him a second look. I mean he’s not ugly by any stretch of the word but he was definitely not my type. BUT as it turned out, he had a great personality. The attraction came after I got to know him and now 9 yrs after, our marriage is still great. I’m not telling you what to do or anything but how will you know that he could be the best thing that ever happens to you if you don’t at least give him a chance?
When I met the one I love, was I sexually attracted? No. But now..
I can, I have and it was the best decision EVER. To cut a long story short- This guy I met through a mutual friend was not conventionally goodlooking (think Colin Firth, not Brad Pitt), I WAS somewhat physically attracted to him, but mostly, there was just “something there”. We hooked up, it wasn’t good. There was like zero chemistry. But he had a nice personality, and I was comfortable in his company. 3 months down the road, the sex (okay not the sex, we weren’t there yet, but the hookups) got hot, and he’s honestly *become* really good in bed, there’s a LOT of chemistry and he’s a really good boyfriend. I can’t keep my hands off him. He’s kind, respectful, extremely supportive, we have the same values and he’s well educated with a high earning potential (I like rich men and I cannot lie). We’ve been dating for over 2 years now and it’s been great. Imagine if I’d dismissed him that first night because there was no chemistry. As Helen Gurley Brown (Cosmo editor) once said: “The truth is, sex is not the same after the first year. Oh it’s pleasant, all right, but it is not the cliff-hanging variety. However, that’s not a bad price to pay for a good man.” I strongly advise you to focus on his character, as the rest can be overcome in time
To be honest, I usually like for a guy to be attractive for me to date them because sometimes I’ll feel embarrassed. But now I see how many guys only want to date girls because of sex, there’s only a few guys who actually stay true to you. My boyfriend now isn’t the hottest person but he’s cute. He has an amazing personality and respects me. So I think you should give this guy a chance because these guys are rare(; But take a chance! You’ll never know till you try! I hope this helps!(:
I totally get were your coming from and the best solution for you i guess is to follow your heart. I mean if you feel like you should give him a chance do it if not I totally think you should stop talking to him and stop wasting your time but maybe you guys can be friends just saying but the main thing is you don’t have to be sexually attracted to someone if you wanna be with that person you should like him for who he is not because of what he looks like or if he’s sexy. i say connection see if you two will hit it off you never know.