Ask A Guy: What’s The Best Way To Flirt With A Guy?

How to flirt with a guy

Just take the plunge, girl! | Source: ShutterStock

Dear Ethan,

What’s the best way to flirt with a boy? There’s this guy I really like, and I want to show him through flirting. So what’s the best way to flirt? Biting your lip? Playfully punching him? Help!

In what has proven to be one of the most popular “Ask A Guy” posts, I outlined how to tell if a guy likes you – and guess what? Those same techniques he uses to flirt with you will also work to grab his attention!

But obviously, guys are very different from ladies in a myriad of ways, so here are some more specific methods to send the right message to the dude of your dreams:

Get physical
Go ahead: touch! Physical contact is not only a sign that you’re interested — if he feels the same way, it’ll also shoot a mini jolt of romantic electricity through his body. So the next time he makes a funny joke, give him a little tap, squeeze, or even one of those playful punches of yours! (Just don’t knock him out.)

Before you know it, this will be you two | Source: ShutterStock

Ask questions; keep conversation flowing; suggest plans. The younger or less mature the guy, the more direct you might need to be (e.g. “Want to get coffee some time?”), as a lack of experience can translate to a lack of assertiveness. But a more self-assured dude who’s already into you will pick up on even the most subtle of prompts (e.g. “Cool sneakers.”) and flirt right back.

Maintain distance
However, it’s important not to get too aggressive. You need to periodically give your interactions some breathing room, and allow him to make some of the moves. As I’ve pointed out before, guys do value “the chase,” making a “hard-to-get” (though not “impossible-to-get”) girl that much more desirable.

I wouldn’t worry about vague signals such as “biting your lip,” which can be ignored — or worse, misinterpreted (“Did you burn your mouth?”). Eye contact and smiles are great to start with, but guys can be pretty thickheaded, often not as attuned to social or emotional cues as women are. Don’t hesitate to ramp up the obviousness if your crush doesn’t pick up on a simple visual hint!

Good luck!

Ethan Fixell is a writer and comedian from New York City best known as one half of comic “dating coach” duo Dave and Ethan. He is also the creator and editor of For more on Ethan, visit…or call his mom, Robin.

Are you confused about a guy? Do you find yourself wondering, “What is he thinking?” Tell us everything in the comments! And if you have a question for Ethan, email him at!


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Posted in: Ask A Guy, Love Advice
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  • Mels

    “Just don’t knock him out” had me laughing for a while.

  • Ashley k

    I did all dis already wit my crush nd he didn’t even notice I even gave him lunch when he was hungry at skool but yet nothing until I gave him a letter nd found out he didn’t feel da same:(

  • AsianIggs1

    …… I am SO using this now. THANK YOU SO MUCH, ETHAN~!!!!

  • Mari

    I’m goona try this with my crush ^-^

  • colombia1994

    i think that there are a lot of diffrent ways to flirt with a guy. i also do believe it has to be based upon their personality if he is shy then dont be all agressive, this tends to scare them away more so. i think that flirting should also be very natural. i am young so this may not sound very well put togther, but from my little experince it depends on how the guy generally is , this is how you should go about flirting this is how i go about flirting.

  • pharynroller123

    also i have friends with benefits and finding the guy of dreams in high school

  • Hayley

    My crushes name is Ethan XD

  • Shayla

    I think an important side note to add to this article is that, if he hasn’t been “picking up” on even your most assertive flirtacious moves, then perhaps he doesn’t want to pick up on them. I think it’s important to maintain a bit of self-control, because if the guy isn’t interested, you may end up looking like a desperate-and-obsessive stalker. Showing your interest via flirting is only useful if the guy sees romantic potential in you. The extent of your flirting should only go as far as his attention span for you does.