The other day I was sexting with my crush (we’ve been hooking up for a while). It was just words and stuff until he asked me to send him some dirty pictures. I didn’t get naked at all, but I sent him something. And then he sent me back a picture of his penis. It was totally weird and turned me off. What am I supposed to do? Am I the only girl who feels this way?? And is it okay that I’m sexting with someone who’s not my boyfriend?
Eep. I feel your pain, girl. Although we all appreciate the male body over here at Gurl.com, we have to face facts: penises are awkward and weird. They’re just strange to look at it, especially for the first time. I mean, there’s nothing wrong with them at all, and not all girls feel this way, but I think I can safely say you’re not alone in getting turned off by a penis picture.
Besides the fact that penises can be, um, kind of ugly at times, there’s another reason why not every girl is into pictures of genitalia the way dudes are. Guys are visual creatures, and they get super turned on by seeing something, whether that be porn, racy cell phone pics or even just two people making out. But girls generally get turned on more by thinking about something – thus the reason the book of Fifty Shades of Grey is insanely popular. Get what I mean?
Basically, this guy probably thought he was going to be turning you on by sending you a picture of his nether regions, because he would get totally turned on if you sent him a picture of your lady bits. I’m sure he wasn’t doing it to be creepy or weird. But it’s fine that you weren’t into it. If you don’t want to say anything right now, you don’t have to – unless it made you feel seriously uncomfortable. If that’s the case, feel free to say, “Hey, don’t ever send me a naked picture like that again. I don’t appreciate it.” But if you let it slide this time, and he does it again, then maybe that time say something.
As for sexting a guy friend, you might want to rethink that. It’s not just the “guy friend” part we have a problem with here at Gurl, it’s the sexting part in general. I know how fun and exciting sexting can, but you need to be super, super careful. Once you send a racy picture, this dude could hold onto it forever. Meaning he could show it to other people, and before you know it, your life has turned into a celeb nude photo scandal.
Be extra cautious since this guy isn’t your boyfriend. If you feel uncomfortable with it, then stop. Make sure that this guy knows that he needs to respect your privacy and you as a person. Just don’t be afraid to say what you feel.
What’s on your mind? Heather can help! Send her your question at firstname.lastname@example.org