My best friend likes this guy. I recently started talking to him and realized that I like him too, and he likes me but he also likes her. He is super sweet and funny. He makes me happy and makes me feel good about myself. She found out that we like each other and she is really upset. What do I do? I like him a lot and can’t make those feelings go away… but I don’t want to lose my best friend! Please HELP!!!
This is definitely a tricky situation. I know this isn’t your fault and you can’t help your feelings, but it’s totally understandable for your friend to be upset. As unfair as it might seem, it sounds like you need to make a choice between your best friend and your crush. That stinks, and it’s definitely going to be a difficult thing for you to go through, but dragging this out is only going to hurt everyone involved even more, including you.
The main thing you need to ask yourself here is this: Is this guy really worth hurting your BFF over? Ideally, your best friend should be the girl who is always there for you and who always makes you laugh. Think about your relationship with your best friend – have you always been able to count on her? How long have you guys known each other? Dating this guy is not only going to ruin your friendship, but it’s also going to hurt her a lot. Are you willing to make her feel totally crappy over this?
I’m not trying to make you feel guilty at all, I just want to help you make the right decision for yourself. It can be really hard to find true friends in this world, and if this girl was a great friend to you, then losing her is going to hurt you as well. Even if you end up dating this dude and you’re totally happy, there will probably always be a part of you who misses your friend – and running back to her once (if) the relationship ends won’t be an option.
If you feel like this guy is really special and you don’t want to give him up (and that’s okay), then you need to talk to your BFF about this and try to salvage things. Tell her that betraying her is the last thing you ever wanted to do, but you can’t help your feelings. Explain to her exactly how you feel and let her know you don’t want to lose her as a friend – see if there’s any way she can learn to be comfortable with the idea of you two together.
You also need to talk to your crush about this seriously. The fact that he has feelings for both you and your friend could be a warning sign. You need to ask him who he really wants to be with and see if he’s totally serious about a relationship with you. While this decision is totally up to you, keep in mind that choosing a guy over a friend can often become pretty messy, especially when that guy isn’t only crushing on you.
Basically what I’m trying to say is that you need to make sure that pursuing this relationship is really worth losing your BFF over. If things don’t end up working out with this guy, it could be a decision you’ll really regret. Go with your gut on this one, and don’t make a quick decision.
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