Even Nuns Think Masturbation Is Awesome!

female masturbation

She doesn't think female masturbation is wrong--but her higher ups don't agree. | Source: Shutterstock

Though in most cases the Catholic church isn’t fond of nearly anything sexual happening between anyone who isn’t married, one nun is coming out in favor of masturbation–specifically, female masturbation–and raising Hell with the Vatican.

Sister Margaret Farley published a book called Just Love, a Framework for Christian Sexual Ethics, and because of its content (in addition to supporting both male and female masturbation, she also endorses gay marriage and doesn’t look down on divorce), she’s coming under fire for preaching “radical feminist ideas.” We think it’s important to note that Sister Farley did warn that the book shouldn’t be used by Catholic educators, so it’s not like she was deliberately, directly, nor overtly preaching against the church’s beliefs to its followers.

With all due respect to the Catholic church and its followers, what her higher-ups are calling “radical feminist ideas,” a lot of us call “common sense.” Because guess what? Masturbation is pretty popular, not all marriages work, and not allowing gays to marry is sort of creating a “separate but equal” doctrine that was tossed out with the first Civil Rights Movement. It’s one thing to be too scared or complacent to want move forward, but this kind of outdated thinking is setting people back.

The other thing is, the people who oppose Farley’s teachings in the book probably haven’t even read it through carefully and just had knee-jerk reactions to words like “masturbation.” In the tome, she actually says masturbation–especially female masturbation–wouldn’t necessarily be a substitute for sexual relationships among committed partners, but actually a way to make them better. She explains that both male and female masturbation let partners figure out what gets them off, which will make sex with their partner better later on. Makes sense, doesn’t it?

But that’s exactly what bugs them the most. The excerpt they cite most in badmouthing Farley’s work is the following bit on female masturbation, in which she explains how female masturbation benefits not only women but their husbands: “[Many women] have found great good in self-pleasuring–perhaps especially in the discovery of their own possibilities for pleasure–something many had not experienced or even known about in their ordinary sexual relations with husbands or lovers.” She finishes by saying that female masturbation “actually serves relationships rather than hindering them.”

We agree! If masturbation can help you in your sex life, it’ll inevitably help your relationship as well–because if you’re with a guy who makes sex feel less than stellar, you’re not going to be happy. And when you’re miserable, what’s the point of being attached? It sounds like Farley may have been pointing to the fact that maybe–just maybe–female masturbation may actually prevent the also-looked-down-upon divorce epidemic.

female masturbation

This is basically how the Vatican interpreted Sister Margaret Farley's support of female masturbation. | Source: Shutterstock

We understand the thinking that sex should only be for procreation (though goodness knows a lot of us don’t agree with it). But the reason sex is supposed to feel good is because if it didn’t, we as a species wouldn’t do it–and then we’d probably die out. We also understand wanting to adhere to old standards and traditions, but that’s not always a good idea to sustain a system or institution–think of it this way: If we didn’t change our thinking at all over time, girls still wouldn’t get an education or be allowed to vote, and women and girls wouldn’t be allowed to wear pants. Ridiculous, right?!

Whether or not you think evolution is what got us here, sometimes it’s necessary to survive. Perhaps if the Catholic church evolved its thinking on female masturbation–among other things–there would be less conflict between nuns and the Vatican–and more women and girls devoted to its teachings.

Do you think that female masturbation is wrong? Do you think Sister Margaret Farley was wrong to write about female masturbation in her book, knowing that the Vatican wouldn’t be happy with it? Do you see moral issues with masturbation? Tell us in the comments!

Here Are A Few More Good Reasons To Masturbate!

Posted in: Health, Sex & Relationships
Tags: , , , ,
  • Johna655

    I am so grateful for your blog article.Really thank you! Fantastic. decfdcgddeke

  • John

    Female masturbation is not wrong. The clitoris does not play an active role in ordinary procreative sexual intercourse, and its obvious purpose is for masturbation. Judging from my past partners, I believe it can even be seen as a spiritual act for many women.

  • nice joint

    What the hell are you all talking about? Can you tell how many nuns masturbate or have sex? Masturbation and sex are private/secret lives of individual. Every has his/her own discreet life. So you can’t tell what anybody does in secret. And let us leave it to God who sees in secret to Judge. We all are humans. I cant even swear for what any nun can do or cannot do.

  • Jennvellcs

    I’m catholic and I don’t think there is anything wrong with masturbation. God made us in likeness to himself, and as long as people use the virtues of temperance and prudence I don’t see how masturbation is a problem. I don’t find a nun writing about masturbation embarrassing either. I think it is a good example of how not everyone in the Church thinks the same way as the Vatican. And fun fact: St Augustine’s famous line is “Lord, Make me chaste, but not yet”. The rules governing Catholics about sex were formed over time, and mostly by people in power.

  • Samantha

    I’m a Catholic and find this to be quite embarrassing a nun is writing this. Unfortunately, masturbation is very difficult to stop but the reason us as Catholics are opposed to it is because sex is for procreating not pleasure. Therefore, if masturbation is only pleasure it isn’t following suit. But hey, each to his own…

  • jenny

    I am a Catholic woman and I have masturbated regularly throughout my life, both before, during and after my marriage ( I am widowed) and continue to do so. I have long since ceased to confess the act as I do not regard it as a sin. No-one else is harmed and I attain sexual pleasure and satisfaction – what is wrong with that? Some religious authorities, Catholic and otherwise, need to get themselves out of the 19th century! I just wish Sister Farley had come right out and admitted that many nuns (and priests)masturbate!

  • rhandzu

    Masturbation is wrong because it involves sexual fantasies, God does not want us to do this

    • Jimmie

      I have been married for over 50 year, I a’m 82 year old and can not have sexual relation with wife as she is sick, I masturbate without any fantasies. JUs for relieve as any other body function.
      I do not think that my masturbation is a sin, but I can not convince the priest I confess to
      I do not need fantasies or any porn ( that is sin).
      That is it.

  • LollipopPuppet

    I don’t see what all the fuss is about…. It feels like NOTHING to me.

  • SketchArtiste

    I’m a Muslim as well people, not extremist, but I tend to take things in an open minded view, and i say if you want to mastubate, then go right ahead! I belive that God created us all with minds of our own, and he understands each and every one of us. He does not judge, nor does He desecrate. I love God, I do. He doesnt create trash, and He doesnt make mistakes. We’re all perfect just the way we are. Oh and btw, I LOVE TOUCHING ME. Haw. Haw.

  • RhondaFan

    I don’t believe masturbation is wrong i think it is natural. Promoting it not so much it’s better to keep it behind closed doors. 😉

  • Tee1120

    I agree with this article, “masturbation let partners figure out what gets them off, which will make sex with their partner better later on”. It does make a lot of sense, I think. My girlfriend and I actually use her sex toy during sex. We got this idea from this article http://goarticles.com/article/A-New-Twist-on-the-Old-Tricks/6565601/

  • Nicki

    I’m a catholic and yes, our church does frown this. She is a nun and she should believe what our religion believes. I really dont care if people masturbate or whatever. I wont do it. Thats all, but her being a nun and writing a book about it is a bit embarrasing.

  • AlliKratt

    Amen, sister!

  • Poppy

    I’m a muslim ,but i dont wear crazy hijab or say my prayers !but i think it is a little nasty to playing with yourself,it’s like giving high5 to yourself!

    • michell

      high5 does not feel as good

      • Tatertot

        Right on sister Farley, now go give yourself a high five

  • Pingback: Sex On The Wire: It Is Almost The Weekend And Sister Margaret Says Get Freaky With Yourself | Celebrity Mess()

  • Pingback: Sex On The Wire: It Is Almost The Weekend And Sister Margaret Says Get Freaky With Yourself()

  • hostadiddyna

    No I do not believe that female masturbation is wrong. Yes I do believe that Sister Farley was wrong to promote masturbation if her religion is against it. But on the other side everyone is a sinner so what is the point in rules when people will not follow it. I believe that masturbation gives females a mind set that will make them love and know their bodies more.

  • Lisa

    It’s just sad that what the Vatican says is still relevant :/

  • Bea

    Right on, Sis Farley. Right on.