How can I win back my ex? I love him! We dated for over a year and he broke up with me about a month ago. I miss him, I really miss him. I gave him time to think about it. I think maybe now I should try to talk to him. I try to but now I just keep losing the courage! Please help me! How can I get him back??
I’m sorry you’re going through this! Breakups stink and can be really hard to get through, especially when you weren’t the one doing the breaking up. I totally feel your pain, and so do tons of other girls out there – but unfortunately, it’s not the best idea to try to win your ex back. I know that’s not what you want me to say, but hear me out: letting him go and moving on is going to be the best thing for you.
Breakups happen for a reason, whether you want to admit or not. Your ex broke up with you because something was wrong in the relationship – if things were going well and you were both happy, you’d still be together or you would have gotten back together already. It can be hard to see that when you’re feeling heartbroken and lonely, but trust me: you two are probably better off without each other right now.
Trying to win back your ex is probably not going to happen the way you want it to. If you really feel like you want to say something, then call him to ask if you two can talk. If he ignores you, blows you off or tells you no, then leave it at that. That’s not him playing hard to get – that’s him letting you know he doesn’t want your relationship to start back up again. Pursuing him even is only going to push him away.
If he is willing to talk, then both of you need to sit down and really discuss what went wrong and why you broke up. Don’t just jump back into things.
But honestly, I’m not really encouraging you to talk to your ex. As I said before, the relationship ended for a reason. This is a great time to focus on yourself and try to move on. Spend time with your friends and family and focus on a hobby that you love. You finally have unlimited time for yourself to do whatever you want, and you should embrace that! If you and your ex are meant to get back together, you will eventually. But pursuing him and trying to talk to him if he doesn’t seem interested is never a good idea, and is never going to make you feel better. Save yourself the extra heartache, the embarrassment and the regret, and move on without him.
What’s on your mind? Heather can help! Send her your question at firstname.lastname@example.org