Do you think that the phrase “once a cheater, always a cheater” is true? Can you trust a guy who is a complete player?
I’ll get right to the point on this one: no, you can’t trust a complete player. If your crush has been caught cheating by other ladies many times before, he’s not likely to change his shady ways any time soon. That’s not to say it would be impossible for him to someday fall in love harder than ever before and have an epiphanic moment of reformation in which he vows to never touch another woman for the rest of his life — but…he’s probably just a cheater. Approach any guy with a known history of being inconsistently loyal with great, great caution.
Now, for those of you already in relationships, I don’t think it’s necessarily fair to automatically write a guy off for slipping up once. Obviously your choice to forgive or forget him is your decision, and one based entirely upon the circumstances of the infidelity and the dynamic of your relationship, but a first-time offender isn’t necessarily going to be a lifelong felon. Everyone makes mistakes.
With that being said, I’d move on from anyone who seems to be forming a pattern. You may have heard this well-known idiom before: “Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.” The author of that expression must have caught his or her loved one liplocked with a stranger on more than one occasion. While “once a cheater” doesn’t necessarily mean “always a cheater,” “twice a cheater” might. So if you are gracious enough to pardon his initial betrayal and he breaks your trust a second time, you should have no qualms with sending him packing.
…Unless you’re into polygamy, of course — in which case, you’ve just struck player gold.
Ethan Fixell is a writer and comedian from New York City best known as one half of comic “dating coach” duo Dave and Ethan. He is also the creator and editor of ActualConversation.com. For more on Ethan, visit EthanFixell.com…or call his mom, Robin.