From The Message Boards: Can Cheating Ever Be Accidental?


vespertine said:
This topic is a toughy. I used to think that there was no way that this “accidental” business could actually happen, until it happened to me. Sometimes it’s not so much an accident as it is the product of influence.

My opinion? Cheating is cheating – and I don’t think you can ever call it accidental. You are always held responsible for your actions, no matter what. When you decide to cheat on someone, you’re making a choice to betray them, whether you realize that in the moment or not.

Yes, situations can very easily get out of hand, and sometimes things do happen. But when a person cheats and they honestly feel terrible about it, their reaction should never be, “It was an accident.” It should be, “I made a mistake and I’m sorry. This is my fault.” I think that saying it was an accident is trying to take the easy way out… and also, in my mind at least, it’s a pretty lame excuse. But taking accountability for your actions? That shows that you’re mature enough to realize what you did really was wrong.

What do you think? Who do you agree with? Can cheating ever be accidental? Have you ever cheated? Let us know in the comments.


So you cheated on your boyfriend… now what?

Posted in: Boards, Cheating
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  1. avatarJohn Tetraus says:

    If you are in a good committed relationship, i find it hard that you would want to cheat anyways,not saying that it could not happen, but in most cases if you want to stray you are the captain of your own ship so to say. I thought getting my doctorates degree was difficult, but lo and behold being in and maintaining a committed monogomous relationship today is difficult. Not saying that it never was difficult but yes i find it takes a lot of effort and thought to be put in. The hardest part is communication around and involving the relationship. If i couldnt maintain or committ to a monogomous relationship i would not of even started a relationship. And i know things change, now that i am older and so is my new girlfriend i find that i want a single monogomous relationship and so does my girlfriend. We talked about this very subject many a night ,I am not saying i am a angel but i never have cheated on my girlfriend and yes there has been many offers and opportunities. And this goes the same for my girlfriend. We are now going into year two of our relationship and we are talking about taking it to the next level. I know for the first eight months of our relationships we had our ups and downs. I got out of a relationship which i had been in for four years. My new girlfriend was still trying to decide who she liked better, me or this off again on again man she has known for 6 years. I must say i finished my old relationship before my girlfriend had and i was left hanging in the unknown zone for about three months before she got her head cleared and realized that the old boyfriend would never amount to anything substantial. When she finally stopped seeing him we became a monogomous couple and have been going strong close to a year. And we have spoken about the need to cheat or how it is called, i lead a very busy life and anybody today that has a good job does, and this goes the same for my girlfriend. Again, it is your own mind and or will that will decide for you at the end.

  2. avataramy says:

    my partner has been cheating on me for 5 months, he had a choice, he blamed me, more skeletons have come out the closet, I don’t understand what went wrong, we was together nearly 5 years, people said we was solid, and I thought we was so good together, I now feel I don’t know him. I havnt found out much about the girl etc, but know who it is, how long they been seeing each other, but feel I don’t want to find out anymore now ;( need to move on with my life

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