I had sex with my ex while dating my current boyfriend. I feel really bad about it, but the problem is that I’m in love with both of them and I don’t want to hurt either of them. Any advice on what I should do???
Eek! Sorry to say girl, but you have definitely gotten yourself into a complicated situation here. Being stuck between two guys is a really hard place to be in, and I’m sure you’re experiencing lots of confusing emotions that are stressing you out. The only thing you can do here is make a decision, as hard as it may be. It’s not fair to keep stringing along both guys, especially if your boyfriend doesn’t know you cheated on him. I know you don’t want to hurt anyone, but unfortunately, someone is going to get hurt here.
The first thing you need to do is ask yourself a few questions: Why did you and your ex break up? Did you ever really let yourself get over him? Do you think you guys could honestly work things out if you gave it a shot? In most cases, an ex is an ex for a reason – and going back to him might end up being a disaster. You really need to think about your past relationship with him. You also need to talk to him (without hooking up). Find out his feelings about you, and discuss what things would be like if you two gave it another shot.
Now ask yourself a few questions about your current boyfriend: What do you love about him? Do you two have a great relationship? Could he possibly be a rebound from your ex? This might sound ridiculous, but make a pro/con list for both guys. It might help you really consider what you like and don’t like about both of them and help you make a decision.
If you still can’t make up your mind once you really think about everything, you should break up with your boyfriend. It’s not fair to him for you to stay with him while you have feelings for someone else – especially since you’ve already acted on those feelings. Be honest with both of these dudes and tell them you’re super confused and you need some time to yourself to think. Maybe clearing your head and being on your own will help you figure out where your heart is.
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