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Why are dudes so into this? | Source: ShutterStock
Hey Ethan,
Why do guys like lesbians? All the guys in my class are always talking about how hot lesbians are. What’s the deal with that?
The female figure has long been admired by both genders, as thousands of classic works of art through the ages will attest. And while men do have Michelangelo’s “David” to brag about, the male body seems comparitively utilitarian next to a female’s – not only does hair sprout from the most awkward of places on its lumpy form (unless you’re David), it’s equipped with a goofy-looking sex organ which is anything but discreet (David included this time). For this reason, the unsightly image of a male can be pretty distracting for a porn-watching guy trying to get a job done.
I’ve probably referred back to this previous post describing men as “visual” creatures at least three times now, but that’s only because this biological truth helps explain so many of our actions. If a woman’s form is what turns men on, the sight of a pair of women will naturally provide double the stimulation for such visually sensitive beings (three, of course, even better; four can cause heads to explode.) In other words, the more women in view, the more vivid the fantasy of ladypart layered upon ladypart becomes. Lesbians offer an increased number of sexual images to focus on without the distraction of some unappealing dude.
Do they really love this? | Source: ShutterStock
However, by no means are all men into lesbians. For example, some guys actually prefer adult movies which feature at least one male because it helps them imagine themselves in the scene. That is, as long as he remains in the background – some male O-Faces are more disturbing than any penis can ever be.
But ultimately, I wouldn’t get too hung up on this recent obsession you’ve detected. Often the “lesbian thing” is a phase younger guys go through when they first discover that girls can have sex with girls. They’ll likely lose interest when they get older and finally realize that the porn industry’s interpretation of lesbian relationships is about as “real” as the breasts of its actresses.
Good luck!
Ethan
Are you confused about a guy? Do you find yourself wondering, “What is he thinking?” Tell us everything in the comments! And if you have a question for Ethan, email him at askaguy@gurl.com!
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“They’ll likely lose interest when they get older and finally realize that the porn industry’s interpretation of lesbian relationships is about as “real” as the breasts of its actresses”
THAT’S STUPID !
If i have to watch porn i watch it solo or lesbian sex. .I HATE PENIS ! they gross me out and likely that i’ll NEVER EVER Watch a porn with a Guy again !
Ok, i have a situation. I like guys. I think they’re hot . But frankly, penis’s gross me out :/ But im super into girls. But i doubt im lesbian. And i dont want to come out as bi because i dont think id have sex with a guy. But i dont want to come out as lesbian either?
“Often the “lesbian thing” is a phase younger guys go through when they first discover that girls can have sex with girls. They’ll likely lose interest when they get older and finally realize that the porn industry’s interpretation of lesbian relationships is about as “real” as the breasts of its actresses.”
My boyfriend is 44 and still goes on about lesbians… :/
What you’ve said makes a lot of sense. If I can add a little, I’d also say that for some men, the very act of lesbian sex as opposed to a nude photo shoot with multiple girls is more enticing in that it adds to the sexual charge. It’s one thing to have one or more girls in the altogether, even if they’re touching each other here and there. It’s another entirely to have them doing to each other what we the audience would like to be doing to them, whether consciously or unconsciously.
I’ve heard some people say that men don’t really want lesbians, they want bisexual women, so that they can get in on it. Personally, I’ve always found strictly girl-on-girl erotica, both literary and visual, to be much more arousing. While my subconscious mind wants them to be attracted to me, it also wants them to not be attracted to any other man. If some other man is in the picture, then he’s getting in on something that I’m not. And I don’t like that, both consciously and unconsciously. If it’s just another girl on screen, that’s not nearly as much of a dilemma. The unconscious mind can tell itself that “Maybe she’d be into me. There’s not really any reason to belief she wouldn’t be.” It’s also a lot harder for a man to sexually envy a woman than another man.
So all in all, a lot of the unpleasant aspects inherent to the act of watching porn, such as watching other people getting some action while you’re at home alone, are absent when watching or reading lesbian erotica, leaving an abundance of the kind of stuff that guys go onto the internet for in the first place.
I’m a girl I find lesbians quite attractive it’s not weird is it? I find gay guys attractive too. It’s not all that weird.
Beth, Nothing weird with that. It’s totally normal. Lots of women find lesbians and gay men attractive. Sexual attraction is not precisely targeted at procreation. Humans can have sex at any time although ovulation allows us to procreate only a few days each month. Finding it weird to be attracted to lesbians and gay men is only as weird as having sex on days when you cannot have kids or using birth control when having sex.
why do we have to like what we cant have??
lately all the hot guys are gay!
Totally I agree I mean… why can’t the ugly guys be gay!!! ( no offense) All these guys are gay and I find myself attracted because theyre uber cute!!
I’m very attracted to the image of gay guys. Totally normal, not immature at all. What is immature is those guys that think lesbians are hot but hate gay guys. Or women who hate lesbians.
Totally agree, Lisa. Intolerance of any kind is generally a sign of immaturity, whether the guys (or girls) are sexually into lesbians (or gay guys) or not!
-Ethan
Ethan, i just wanted to say that your answers are awesome. I look up to you, you have helped me through a lot. Love you stay cool!
I love everything about this. It’s logical, funny, and completely true. Thank you Ethan, for being amazing.
Thank YOU, Alli, for reading and supporting!
-Ethan
Hmmmm, now I’m wondering if my pixie cut makes the guys in my school swoon with mental sex images.
Ha, I don’t know if it works quite like THAT, Gavina… But thanks for reading!
-Ethan