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Let's stop putting each other down, girls | Source: ShutterStock
So, normally we like to post a debate from our message boards on the site to get you girls talking. But this week we’re doing things just a little bit differently. A recent post in the boards caught our eye, and we just couldn’t let it go unnoticed.
Leylaxx had some pretty awesome things to say about the term ‘slut’ – and we’re proud to say we totally agree with her! Her super smart opinions are just another reason why we think our readers are amazing. Read what she had to say and let us know: how do you feel about the world slut? Do you ever call other girls sluts? Have you ever been called a slut? Check it out:
Leylaxx said:
I think the biggest reason I object to the word ‘slut’ is because it degrades women by suggesting there is a set number of sexual partners they are permitted to have to retain their sexual worth (as if that is all that women are good for). I just really don’t see how other people’s sex lives affect me… so it is not my business to intrude.
It’s very sad to see young girls calling other girls sluts. While I do support safe, healthy sex (with all the important protection), where the safety of it ends is where my interest in your bedroom life ends, too. My primary concern is about young girls becoming pregnant or ill–and frankly, this is my concern for myself, and all other women!
But I do not see what the problem is with educated, informed, consenting women having multiple sexual partners.
You shouldn't be ashamed of having sex! | Source: ShutterStock
So what if she ‘owns’ her sexuality and does whatever makes her happy? Good for her! Yes, it does increase your chances of catching a diseases if you have a lot of partners, but as long as you use the proper protection every time, that is going to minimize the chance. Crossing the street many times also increases your chances of getting hit by a car, statistically anyways. So, always look left and right before you cross.
As long as she is not using sex to substitute a void in her heart (this is a problematic situation and she would really best be taken care of by a psychologist/counselor/therapist than a sexual partner), her sex life is not my concern.
Women and men should do whatever makes them happy and not get judged for it, especially if they are:
a) Educated
b) Very informed about how to minimize disease/pregnancy
c) Prepared to deal with the emotional consequences
d) HAPPY
Do you agree with what she had to say? What would you add to this discussion? Be honest – do you call girls sluts? Tell us everything in the comments.
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I completely agree. I get called a slut a lot when I am a virgin and never given a blowjob or anything like that. But if girls want to do that then go ahead! Its nobody elses business what people do in their private lives and I think these bitchy girls should try to understand that. I don’t get called a slut or whore by guys…just girls. Why do females feel the need to bully eachother. I would never try to make anyone feel as down as they’ve made me feel. Nobody deserves to be called a slut. I don’t think it should exsist. You can sleep with as many people as you want. Its your choice and nobody should get involved.
I can understand WP’s poitison, but I also think there is value in labelling a situation in which a person feels that their behaviour has become self-destructive and all but impossible to control. I realise that there is a risk that the determination of self-destructive may be made by society rather than the person themselves, but that doesn’t mean the reverse isn’t possible. I agree that, particularly in the media, the gender bias is dangerous, but I’m cautious about dismissing the concept altogether when both men and women describe themselves as having an addiction to sexual activity in the traditional vein of addiction using the behaviour as self-medication to the exclusion of other coping skills and to their own detriment. They may or may not be the minority of the people who claim to be sex addicts, and again, I really do agree with your central point, I just don’t like seeing things that people genuinely identify with in scare quotes.
What she’s saying is totally true! We shouldn’t care what other girls are doing with guys, but how many of you are actually that kind of girl who try not to listen to gossip? I’d say about 1 out of 50 of you are. I can honestly say that if I heard of a girl giving blow jobs at school and dating all of the football players I would definitely be interested and go on to call her a slut. As awful as the word is I just can’t seem to get it out of my vocabulary use.
The term slut is so overused, people refer to people as a slut now who have kissed more than one guy, its derogatory aswell. HATE the word.
I totally agree with her!
I totally agree!!!!! You go GURL!!!!!!
we are not mammals we are human beings with reason. animals “murder” eachother and that doesnt make it right. slut is a wrong word to use and go ahead and have as many sex partners as you want but i believe in waiting for marriage and sharing that special union for life. all those comments about mammals make me wanna vomit.
Comparing humans to other mammals is silly. Why? Because unlike other species who have multiple sex partners, humans have a much more emotionally advanced and as previously stated cherish relationships much more. Depending on your religious view, multiple sex partners is a bad thing but that doesnt give people a right to call others sluts because of how they live their lives. As long as their not hurting anyone, whos business it it?
slut is the worst word in the human language. Slut/whore/skank/cunt. they all mean the same thing & they all make me furious. I can literally handle being called ANYTHING except for those words. even if someones joking my face gets red & my hands ball into fists. It makes me so angry. I. HATE. IT!
Personally I don’t like words ‘slut’ and ‘ho’. I only don’t like those types of words because they are rude and demeaning to everyone.
I’ve never been called a ‘slut’ , but that’s because I don’t give people a reason to. Honestly I don’t think that there is a true definition because everyone thinks different.
Honestly I only call people a ‘slut’ if I’m in my goofy mode or if I’m really mad at them. I feel really bad about calling them that though because I wouldn’t want anyone calling me that.
Really there is no reason to call someone a ‘slut’ because there is no true definition and everyone knows that if they were called that then they would be mad.
Amen to this!!! I love Leylaxx for saying what needed to be said! Hell, I felt like a whore today because I wore a SKIRT, for God’s sake. I need to get over myself!!!
thats what im syin to GURL!!
I really agree. Even of people think its bad, its about what you want.
Completely agree with this! the number of sexual partners someone has is their own business!!!! male or female!
I completely agree with her. Really great.
Leylaxx
You are amazing. O-O
You are Gurl.com famous
Woah Ashley, your comment was toatlly NOT okay! First off, just because you are called names like prude or virgin mary (which also isn’t cool because your choice of not having sex is JUST as valid and adequate as someone else’s choice to have sex) doesn’t give you the right to call someone such a hurtful name like slut. I mean, have you ever heard an eye for an eye makes the whole world blind? Who wants to be judged for their sexual activites or lack thereof? No one!! The word slut is demeaning to women because it measures women on their sexual worth. Just because someone has multiple partners, doesn’t mean they abuse their body . As long as they are educated, practicing safe sex, and are healthy and happy, what gives you the right to bash on them? Unless someone is in danger of hurting themselves or having phsycoligical problems from her sexual activities, their sex life IS NOT YOUR CONCERN. How do you know if they take their decision for sex lightly? Chances are, if they are educated enough to practice safe sex, they are not taking it lightly, because they understad the reprocuttions that having sex can bring. So don’t play into gender roles and don’t judge someone because of their sex life. It’s not cool.
100% true, but i do wish we would try to have 1 sexual partner because- but just make sure your happy.
Why only one? One sexual partner is not normal. Humans are mammals, and mammals are not designed to be monogamous. Only around 12% of animal species stay with one partner, and almost all of those are birds. The whole idea of one guy, one girl is an artificial human notion and goes against biology.
Maybe people just feel like they should have partner. If you’re in a long term relationship having mutliple sexual relationships with other people, you’re partner may not agree with that. Humans have a natural tendency to cherish relationships and in a way for some people having a sexual relationship with more than one person can break that “bond” of trust.