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Would you rather have a lot of partners? | Source: ShutterStock
Okay, so we’ve already asked you girls if your number of sexual partners is a big deal to you – but now we want to know something a little bit different: would you be okay with only having one sexual partner? As in, only sleeping with one person… ever?
Although that used to be the norm way back when (kind of), nowadays there’s no shame in having more than a couple of sexual partners. But just like there are plenty of people who enjoy sleeping around (nothing wrong with it as long as you’re safe!), there are also plenty of people who stay with their first forever. And there’s nothing wrong with that either! We saw this discussed in the boards, and we want to know: would you be cool with only having sex with one person? Or do you think a girl should experience things? Read what these girls said and then let us know what you think:
Yakubutsu asked:
I’m just wondering…why do lots of people state that they would’ve hated it if they married the only person they slept with, or that it’s better to sleep around before you get married? I know lots of people will just be like “OMFG, I could NEVER marry the ONLY person I’ve had sex with!?” or say it”s “better” to have multiple partners before you do get married, but surely if you’ve found what you’re looking for in all aspects, then that’s worth more than sleeping around? I would love to hear people’s opinions on this. I’ve heard so many people say that you’d be “missing out” if you don’t have more that one partner and so many other people, a massive range of ages, say that it doesn’t really matter at the end of the day if you’ve found what you want.
Is he your one and only? | Source
Jbabiie03 said:
Personally, I don’t think you are “missing out” if you only have one sexual partner. I think that if you only have one sexual partner and you marry him/her, somewhere in the future one will wonder what it would have been like with someone else. I don’t think this applies to everyone but I do think most people will have these thoughts of what it would be like with someone else.
iamsodrunk said:
From my perspective, it’s hard for me to understand how somebody can be happy doing what I see as limiting their experiences. I love experiencing life as much as possible, especially when it comes to personal relationship, and I feel that sexual relationships are a big part of that. I can be really impulsive about sex because in the end, if I DON’T do it then I will always regret not having that experience.
All three girls make great points, and when it comes down to it, we’re going to have to say what they all pretty much ended up saying (check out their full responses here): it really depends on what you want and how you feel.
If you only have sex with one person, and you want to be with them forever, there’s nothing wrong with that! Not everyone needs tons of sexual experiences in life to be happy. But if you want to experience sex with a lot of people, that’s fine too. It’s really about what makes you happy – don’t let society tell you what’s wrong and right.
Who do you agree with? Would you be okay with having one sexual partner? Tell us in the comments!
And also join this convo: would you date a cheater?
New Quiz!
Bedroom Quiz!
Can You Trust Him?
My boyfriend is the only guy I’ve ever slept with and I hope it stays that way.
We’ve been together for 2 years, (he’s been with another girl before me), and we really love each other so much that we just want to be together. I don’t think it’s limiting my experiences. I mean, what are you going to think about during your last days? How you got to sleep with a bunch of people, a lot of them being virtual strangers to you, or how you got to share a special connection and love with a better half?
Mayeb from time to time, I will wonder what it would have been like if I were to sleep with other people, but honestly, when I try imagining myself being intimate with someone other than my boyfriend, it freaking terrifies me to the point I can’t stand imagining it.
I recently moved in with my high school sweetheart while were in college together. Weve been a couple since we were 16, and he was my first. Im came to this board looking for opinions on only having one sexual partner, because being in college, i have no been wondering if the grass is truly greener on the other side (for the first time). It can be hard because i love my boyfriend and when i picture my future, i see him in it. But there are times i wondee about what a meaningless hookup would be like…as terrible as it sounds. One things for sure…the thought of loosing my beloved boyfriend is MUCH worse than the thought of not experiencing another person. I just feel guilty though when the thought even crosses my mind, becauee i love him so much and could never actually be without him.
I’ve only been with one guy. And he’s been with me and a previous girlfriend, so I just think I have an interesting perspective to contribute.. (Btw, we’ve been together for two years now)
I’m totally happy having only been with him. I hope that he is the only sexual partner I have for the rest of my life. It’s not like I haven’t been curious about other men, but if I actually try to fantasize about other men, I kinda gross myself out. I guess the love aspect is just way more important for me.
Then he’s had sex before I came along, and it kinda bothers me. I can’t help but feel a little jealous that I was not his first, like he was mine. I think about how important it was for me emotionally, and can’t help but think that he has those connections to another woman. Granted, he’s told me that if he could go back in time, he wouldn’t have slept with her. This helps a bit, but the fact is, he can’t.
Sleeping with multiple partners is totally fine as long as everyone involved is fully aware and no one’s feeling’s get hurt (and no one spreads STIs). Personally though, I’m very proud of the fact that I’ve only been with one guy. Can’t tell you why, but it is how I feel.
I just happened to hit this discussion searching for something else. But, as a 32-year-old, I would have to say that I would give anything to have met and had my only sexual experience as well as his only sexual experience with the right guy. I think that would create a much stronger bond in a relationship and especially in a marriage. Multiple partners is overrated. All it really does is cause stress and heartache, not only at the time, but in your future marriage as well.
I come from a very strict Christian family, and so sex is kinda out of my reach. I can’t imagine my parents’ reaction to me having sex, but quite honestly, I’d think more about being a virgin ’til I get married. Then I’d probably think about what It’d be like with someone else. Even though one of the ten commandments is to be loyal to your spouse… I honestly don’t know. Sex is too complicated.
In the bible it says that god wanted sex to be the ultimate way for married couples to show their deep love for one another it is supposed to be sacred and pure but its been kind of corrupted since then by pornographic material making it un sacred and impure as it was meant to be honestly in just a young teen that want the best for everyone so i hope!!!! U wait because i am
I agree with Jbabiie03, once you find that person who romantically and sexually pleases you why want any one else. But depending on the person you will have your times were you just wonder what it would be like having sex with someone else, especially if its becoming the “same old” and you want to experience something new. But if you do feel this way there is always new things you can try to spice up your sex-life with your partner.
Coming from a Christian perspective, I am perfectly fine with not having sex until marriage and having my husband be my only sexual partner.
I’ve only ever had one boyfriend and he was my first everything. Sometimes I feel like I missed out because he’s had other girlfriends and different kisses whereas he was my first. But I’m happy that we were both virgins when we got together because it made that experience much more special.
One boyfriend-now-husband.
One sexual partner only, ever.
Zero — count them — ZERO regrets.
I am in an 8 month relationship and were eachothers first times doing anything besides making out. weve reached the point where we have had sex a handfull of times and we do want to be together for the rest of our lives, yes i know its teenage love because we are only 15/16. but if that actually does happen to where we are together for years throughout the stages of growing up and miss out on other experiences I wonder if that would be bad or good for our relationship. I would love to be with him and have a family together and everything but missing out on one of the most personal apects of life makes stuff get more serious
First of, I’m not a person looking for sex, I’m looking for a committed relationship, so that’s a big factor in it; I’m looking to spend my life with someone, so I believe it is possible to develop in experience with one person. Someone who have sex with one hundred people one hundred times is just as experienced as someone who had sex with one person, one hundred times. Sure, meeting a new person can bring in new things, but guess what else can; imagination, the internet, and a partner who is willing to explore and develop along side you.
I feel it’s wrong to think that with more people comes more experience, it’s more like with more people comes more chance to sleep with all the hotties (and there is nothing wrong with that), but I believe that who ever wants to expand partners for knowledge should just sit tight with their lover, and go pick up a Kerma Sutra book. I’m a firm believer in that sex, no matter how inexperience the person is, is better when in love, because think about it, when you’re in love, a lot of dumb things your partner does doesn’t matter anymore.