Debate Club: Is It Okay To Flirt With A Guy Who Has A Girlfriend?

Melanie Says: No Way Because Of Karma
Flirting with someone who is obviously attached is just not cool. It’s disrespectful to that person’s relationship, puts them in an awkward position (of not wanting to be a jerk to you, but also not wanting to screw up things with their girlfriend or boyfriend), and makes you look a bit desperate (I mean, can’t you find your own cuddle buddy?!). I know girls who do this all the time, and they wonder why people get annoyed at them. I think the answer is pretty obvious!


Jessica Says: It’s Usually Not A Big Deal
I don’t think innocent flirting is that serious, no matter if the dude is married or what. I mean, let’s face it, we all flirt! I’ll admit to flirting with guys who are in relationships, but it’s never been over-the-top or anything touchy-feely. However, I  wouldn’t do it if I knew it was making my own boyfriend super uncomfortable, and I would never do it to my friends’ boyfriends. There’s definitely a fine line, and while I usually don’t think it’s serious, I’ll definitely admit that sometimes it’s wrong.



Julie Says: Go For It
Flirting is just that: flirting. A coy smile or a funny e-mail or even a little shoulder squeeze doesn’t make anyone a cheater. Being a cheater makes you a cheater. So, I feel totally fine being a little flirty with a guy in a relationship…just like I’d be totally fine with my guy flirting with someone. Relationships are about trust, not about avoiding eye contact with anyone who could possibly wink at you. I say flirt away. As long as your intentions are fine and you’re just having fun, it’s really no big deal.


Who do you agree with? Do you flirt with people who are in relationships? Tell us in the comments.


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Posted in: Advice Gurl, Cheating, Discuss, Health, Sex & Relationships, Love&Sex, Relationships
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  • echarlie33

    Yeah, but there’s the guy who flirts “innocently”, I’m led on to think he’s interested, he acts all hot and cold – making me confused, I flirt back, then he starts treating me like I’m the obsessed one. I always make sure the coast is clear, that there isn’t a girlfriend/wife around. Then I back off confused, then he flirts again then acts mean to me the next. He gets angry if I talk to other men. One day he posts pictures of himself romantically linked to another woman. It dawns on me he is “taken” just by a few photos and never having admitted it. He still openly flirts with other women and I’m wondering what this woman in the photo thinks of all the women he keeps accumulating on fb. I become angry and feel like a fool. I distance myself more. He’s friendly to me again. Surprise. I go on a mini-retreat to question why I keep attracting men like this, then I walk away not feeling like I won in this situation. I ask–am I really desperate or am I a perfect match as victim for narcissistic types?

    He got his ego boost, he got to take advantage of someone he knew was single while he had his relationship going. He thinks he’s inflating his pride not knowing that deep down really he has low self-esteem. I end up venting on dating help sites. And I say I won’t get fooled again…

  • Lovely UAB CHIC

    I think flirting is natural. For most its innocent way of making sure ,”hey I still got it,” if you are one of those that are taken. However there are as mentioned in other posts FINE LINES! A person knows there limits!!!! For example my Bf and I are were falling out because of a friend he has in a similar class we have together. This friend of his also has another class with him. Because of this class he got to know her a little more. They became close after a little while… UNTIL WHOA THERE, The chic took it too far!!!!!!! Texting him, asking him what he was doing and texting him playful I love you’s. WAAAAAAAYYYYYYY TOOOOOOOOOOOOOO FARRRRRRRRRR!! He had to cut that off. And even though she was giving the whole we are just friends blah blah speech, I knew her motives were darker. Especially if her background for sleeping with other peeps bfs is out there…. mannnn who is ya foolin’!! … From that example the point was GIRLS ITS COOL in some cases, but KNOW THE FINE LINES. FOR ME PLAYING IT SAFE IS THE BEST, IF THE PERSON IS SINGLE AND LOOKING TO MINGLE GO FOR IT!!!!!! 🙂