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In all honesty, I’ve put up with a lot of crap from guys–but there’s one thing I absolutely will not stand for, and that’s racism. If a friend says something racist, it’s pretty much guaranteed we won’t be friends for long–so why would I agree to date a racist dude? I wouldn’t. Well, at least not knowingly.
I had already been on one date with this cute guy I met at a cafe and was excited to meet him for a second date. He took me to a museum and to see a movie–then to eat cheesy fondue at one of my favorite restaurants. So fun!
I was totally into the date (and the guy!) until he pointed to another couple and said, “What do you think is going on there?!” I looked over and saw some random white guy in his 20s sitting next to a Korean girl in a cute dress. I didn’t understand what he was talking about, so I said, “Um, I don’t know? They’re having dinner?” And he replied:
“That guy had better watch out. I hate Asian girls–they’re evil!”
I think my jaw must have hit the table. I couldn’t believe he was serious, so I laughed and said, “You must be joking,” to which he went on this crazy rant about how his brother had dated “lots of Asian girls” and been “screwed over” by every one of them.
At that, I grabbed my jacket, laid a $20 on the table (I didn’t want that jerk buying me dinner–eew!) and walked out. Dude actually chased me into the street insisting that he wasn’t a racist, but um, I already knew the truth.
At least it happened on the second date so I didn’t waste too much time with the loser?
What’s the worst thing a guy has said to you? Tell us in the comments!
This guy made this girl feel seriously awkward. Find out how!
I think walking out was the right thing to do, even if he was kidding. I wouldn’t want to hang out with a guy knowing he likes to make racist jokes
Wow! I think the whole walking away thing was pretty dramatic, but I mean I guess that was a big turn off for you
awww! i loooove mix race babies! they are the cutest. <3
wooooooooooowwwww. how dramatic.i swear when people say things like that most of the time it’s just joking around. im hispanic and my friends joke around sayin hey ese wassup or loca que lo que even though they’re not hispanic which is fine with me. then in our group i have an asian friend that she started a joke calling herself a ninja which we all think is hilarious. its not anything serious of course because then that would be horrible but we always fine these stereo types funny, ridiculous, or just plain stupid. now if you spend the whole day making fun of a race or if your afraid of one then your a racist.
It’s one thing to make jokes about a race to a friend who is that race, when you have their okay, or when it’s your own race/heritage, and you ONLY do it when you’re around people who you know are okay with it. But when you make a comment about a race to someone when neither you or that person are that race, and you don’t know the person well enough to know how they will take it… that’s different. When she asked “You must be kidding” and instead of saying “Well yeah, just an inside joke with my brother because…”, he went on a rant that sounded like it was pretty serious. He probably didn’t even realize that that was being racist. I don’t blame the girl, the guy crossed a line way too soon without finding out how she felt about those kinds of comments.
It doesn’t sound like he is racist, more like just kidding. As an asian girl, I know some asian races are more catty than others. It is also part of our culture to be somewhat conniving because in fables and stories, it is seen as clever no matter the outcome. Seeing he is talking about his brother’s experience, not his own, the comment is more passing conversation than true insight of his character. O well, you win some, you lose some.
I’m Asian and I would just laugh at the guy and say maybe his brother was just that awful. I don’t believe that only a certain race acts a certain way. It’s how you’re raised and treated. My friends use stereotype jokes on me but because my mom raised me the way I am, I don’t take offense. I laugh along and make my own jokes.
Hey, thats no excuse. But if he said he wasnt racist, then hes not. you never know, his bro could have dated 100 of them, but thats because of the PERSON. not because of their race. instead of being judgemental the way he was to asian girls…you should have told him that. and ended it gently.
“If he said he wasn’t racist, then he’s not.”
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA.
*wipes tear*
Phew, thanks bro. That’s the best joke I’ve heard all day.
HAHAH! agree with you… I mean, Hitler didn’t call himself racist either now, did he? So he must be totally not racist!!! *sarcastic*
and I think that Melanie’s reaction was justified. Good on you for letting that guy know what is appropriate and what isn’t! ANY type of discrimination is awful!
That’s ridiculously dramatic.