Comments on: I Regret Losing My Virginity. Now What?

By: lilbutterfly

lilbutterfly — Tue, 11 Dec 2012 03:37:22 +0000

you lost your virginity to him and you EXPECTED to continue a long bond with him. You wanted to have sex and you felt satisfied though it wasnt the best experience. It isnt as though he forced you into it or “stole” it from you. You make it sound as though you sacrificed something that you didnt want to part with in the first place. It wasnt as though you reluctantly parted with your virginity just to please him. But YOU had a choice and you chose to do it. This is where the problem lies. Girls think that just because they give up their virginity to a guy, that he should be forever indebted and devoted to her. But really, it isnt just the guy who enjoyed the experience. Both of you did. It is different if she was forced or raped. This was mutually agreed upon and consensual.
The problem is that we build “fairy tales” in our minds and our expectations go haywire. Instead, if girls just prepared for their first time with understanding their bodies, planning who they want to do it with, reading about it etc and NOT expect huge amounts of loyalty from the guy, in return for sex, disappointments will be far less.
I dont think it is fair to blame the guy here. I agree his etiquette is shocking and there should be a decorum around having sex. But obviously he was lacking those finer qualities. Pity you chose him. I bet he was closer to your age too. Older guys get such a bad name but most older guys feel the responsibility to be more endearing to their girls and the emotional responses are far superior than with guys our age.
This is why I just never go out with guys my age. They are so immature and have no etiquette. My boyfriends have always been much older and thankfully I have not had any bad experiences.
Plz dont blame anyone. Just learn from mistakes. I call it an experience and a very valuable one too. Sex and intimacy is such a beautiful experience and you will most certainly experience something far better with time.

By: Thickums:)

Thickums:) — Sat, 08 Dec 2012 05:07:35 +0000

I know competely how you feel! i lost mine october 16 and now that guy barely talks to me. I’ve been hurt for soo long. Crying myself to sleep and he flirts with other girls in front of my face!

By: Kat

Kat — Mon, 26 Nov 2012 22:50:52 +0000

It’s Ok! You are so much more than sex. I hope that you can move on. You have not thrown it all away. You are just feeling guilt and remorse. That’s what happens when you make desicions that aren’t absolutely perfect. Think about your relationships with guys and how they have changed over the years, or months. And think about your bond with God. God loves you, don’t ever forget that. Sex is OK, even good, but don’t feel your’e worthless.

also use protection

By: Lainey

Lainey — Wed, 21 Nov 2012 01:37:59 +0000

Uhm, ever heard of the word S E X I S T?
Girls can have sex whenever they choose. They can wait or not wait or do it every day if they want.
It is no longer the 1700s where girls are basically sold to their husbands at the age of twelve, him being 30 or 40. Sex before marriage is becoming increasingly common because we now marry for love, not a large payment to our fathers. If YOU want to wait until you are married, that is your call. Don’t go pushing it in people’s faces. Religion is like politics there is no right or wrong answer an saying one thing too many times convinces people it’s a lie. You don’t tell everyone of a different political party they are wrong, do you? If you do, many people will have a tendancy to not want to be around you because you are closed-minded. Life is meant to be lived with your mind and your eyes open. Don’t close your eyes while you’re living. You’ll misinterpret everything you see.

By: Karly

Karly — Mon, 29 Oct 2012 21:47:54 +0000

I understand your concern about being a virgin to avoid situations like this, but some people don’t believe in the same things you do. And if it was such a big deal, then why would you put yourself through unnecessary aggrivatedness and read this article. Or even respond. I would have to say that, on your part, you should just get out because this is ridiculous xD

By: Jo

Jo — Sun, 28 Oct 2012 12:40:41 +0000

I agree!

By: Vianey

Vianey — Wed, 17 Oct 2012 20:28:47 +0000

I know how you feel.. I lost my virginity to a guy that just wanted to have sex, a guy that said he didnt have a gf but it was all a lie. I was like his back up plan to him, he played me. But kyou gotta learn from your mistakes right. Just think twice about giving it up to another guy

By: Mina

Mina — Thu, 13 Sep 2012 11:44:08 +0000

*felt

By: Mina

Mina — Thu, 13 Sep 2012 11:43:24 +0000

I completely understand because I lost it last night, and I felt like I threw my promise to myself and to God away for just one night. And I feel alone and I feels like I failed. I wanted to wait ’til I got married but I felt pressured. Now I feel like nobody would want me anymore. :’(

By: Emily

Emily — Tue, 04 Sep 2012 07:30:33 +0000

Well SOME of us aren’t christian so we can lose our virginity whenevr we want.