6 Rules That Can Take You From Friendship to Love

from friendship to love

He has to know I'm into him! Right? Right??

There’s a thin line between friends and sweethearts and you, gorgeous, seem to be trapped on the wrong side. So how can you go from friendship to love?

First of all, make sure that this is even a good idea. Yeah, you may be hot for your buddy but is this enough of a reason to try to turn your friendship into a new relationship? Dating is not as stable as just being friends. If you want to date a long-time friend, think really seriously about it first. You could end up killing an awesome friendship if things don’t work out.

On the other hand, say there’s someone in your crew who you’re casual friends with but you just can’t stop thinking about. Every time this cutie bumps into you your heart goes pitter patter and the rest of the world just falls away. You are crushing hard.

If you’re going to break out of the friend zone, or at least give it the old college try, you have to set the stage and then tell your friend how you feel. Here’s how to do that in six easy steps:

Mike and Tina were just buds until they worked at summer camp together!

1. DO share an adrenaline rush activity together.

Adrenaline gives the body the feeling of new love. When we break a sweat with someone, we literally feel revved up and excited. Take a roller coaster ride, go swimming or take a run together.

2. DON’T try to be a friend with benefits.

Just hooking up is not going to make your friend suddenly see you as a potential GF. You’ll just be the cool friend to hook up with and why would they want to transition out of such a sweet situation? Most guys won’t buy the truck if they’re getting the ice cream for free!

3. DO get closer . . . physically

You’re not hooking up but you are touching your friend’s arm every time you get a chance. Brush a stray hair out of his eyes. Squeeze his hand to make a point. Every time you touch someone lovingly, their brain gets a burst of feel-good chemicals that make them feel good about you.

Ginny's firey personality? Super attractive.

4. DON’T blindly agree with everything he says.

When we like someone we can start to idolize them. Then we crack up at every joke, agree with every point. Bo-ring. No one needs their own personal yes-woman. If you want to be interesting be interested. Have genuine conversations where you disagree, express your interests and show your POV. This is infinitely sexy.

5. DON’T keep chasing if it’s clear the feeling is one-sided.

If the other person says that you’re not his type, believe him. Trying to change someone’s mind, friend or not, after they say they’re not interested will only lead to them avoiding you.   

Now what?

With the stage is set, if your friend is also interested you should be getting attraction signals in return. If it’s still ambiguous, you need to reveal your feelings. Communication is key in friendships and relationships.

6. DON’T confess your undying love.

Ask, “what if we went out on a real date?” or “do you ever think of me as a girlfriend type?” If your friend says yes then you are off to the dating races with a great foundation for love–your friendship! If your buddy says no, share a laugh together and honestly address the awkwardness and disappointment as you continue to be great friends.

Do you have a friendship you’d like to turn into something more? Tell us about your crush in the comments!

Now, find out what to say on a first date!

Posted in: Being Yourself, Friends & Family, Health, Sex & Relationships, Help&Advice, Love&Sex, Relationships, Uncategorized, Your Life
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  • Denise

    I’m 42, he’s 44.I’m a widow of 5+yrs, he’s a well known musician.We’ve known of each other for years, but a few months back, struck up a friendship through social media, talking 2-3 hrs at night.I had to take an out of town trip for personal business, and invited him to go along a month ago.He agreed and it was a great time.It turned from just a couple days into 8 mainly due to weather.We slept in the same bed every night but no sex. During this excursion, we learned a mutual favorite band was playing there in a month (next week ) so we got tickets.He works alot, but still manages to come stay 2 nights a week.We live an hour apart.We have a great time together, laugh and even peck each other with kisses.He’s overcoming a bad breakup without any resolve.I am really falling for him but I can’t help but wanna protect my heart.Losing my husband was difficult and this is the first man who 1. Is compatible and good enough morally and 2. Who isn’t just looking for sex. He admitted he could only be friends yet the overnight stays send mixed messages. HELP.

  • Steven

    We’ve been friends 2yr and live 5hrs apart. Since mid summer we have been speaking ever 10 days or so. She has never mentioned another guy. She remembers the simplest statements I make. When contacting her, she responds immediately. How can I find out if she is willing to take the next step and not loose a friend?

  • Anonymous

    My crush flirts with every girl basically but he tells me he wants to do all this stuff so I don’t know can someone help?

    • Rashmi Mishra

      If he is doing something, ask him if you can do the same ?
      If he says yes, let him go.
      If he says no, ask him to stop all this because a relationship can never run from one perspective. you guys needs to be in the same page.

  • Solly

    Xup pple. Y am i nt getting any message in reply? Plz help me out!

  • Solly

    Plz pals. I kind of nid ur helps concerning sth urgent. I jst hooked up wit a lady as a frnd nd i love dis gal but dosen’t wnt to tell her yet. Nd wat ws in her mind was 4 me to b her mentor religiously. Nw, she told me bluntly dt “NO STRINGS ATTACHED” wt shuld i do nd cn such friendship lata lead to a gud relationship?

  • Shariq ghazi

    Hi iam the ghazi the girls like me

  • CarlyAndKitt

    i agree about the ginny thing. she’s so obsessive and stalkerish!!

  • foreverlover

    If you like someone really make sure you like them and if you do just go for it. Maybe he will like you back but you will never know until you ask him or tell him you like him. See for me i asked out my long time friend, but he said he wasn’t ready to date yet because he just got out of a relationship with his girlfriend. But all i know is that he likes me but doesn’t want to date until he is fully ready. His ex girlfriend already started dating again be he just wants to wait until he is fully ready. He is the type of guy you can trust and won’t use you to get another girl jealous. Thanks for reading “)

  • Sabella

    I’ve had a crush named Steven since Second grade when I first met him till now I’m in 10th grade we dated once in sixth grade but we decided it was awkward 😛 but now were more mature and I really like him and theres a girl named Kaitlyn and she’s beautiful Bo to be honest I think I’m beautiful to buy a lot of boys like her and I think Steven like her and me and Steven are best friends so he tells me everything like if I asked who he liked he would tell me and a couple of times I would ask and he wouldn’t say my name and it would break my heart 🙁 but my bestest friend in the whole world ( Madsion) tells me she can tell he likes me but I don’t think he does, he flirts with me a lot thow 🙂 I’m a red-head and he calls me his GingerSnap 🙂 when he says that it makes me like him even more cause he’s like your my GingerSnap but I still don’t know if he likes me 🙁 and I’m terrified to tell him!!! I really need help with this tricky situation 🙂 should I tell him or forget about it and move on but it’s gonna be hard tO move on cause I really like him thanks for reading 🙂

    • BuBbElZ14

      I would tell him but don’t be like “hey i like you!” you have to be suddel and like bring up how you guys used to date and be like “what if we ever dated again” then by his reaction to that you should know. Hope it helps!



  • Nikki

    From my perspective, she watches Harry for years, unable to be seen by him as anything other than his best friend’s sister. How would that make you feel? She is just younger than them, not dumber.

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  • blinky

    I find it ironic that the picture to go with #4 is of Ginny from Harry Potter. Ginny Weasly is the most boring, flat, useless, watery character in the whole series and NOBODY likes her.

    • chelseamccandless

      Wow your a BIg hater then.. Theres nothing wrong with ginny she plays a charactor she mightned be like that in real life!!!!1 i dont get why you haters cant keep it to yourself! k.thanks.bye

    • Anonymous

      completely agreed, but my one friend loves Ginny for some reason, but i just see her as an obsessive girl who is a horrible example for people because thats how she got the guy, encouraging stalkerness….