Debate Club: Is Oral Sex A Big Deal?

Oral Sex A Big Deal

Do you take oral sex seriously?

It’s been pretty established that having sex (as in intercourse) is a pretty big deal. Even after you’ve done it a million times, the first time you get naked with someone can still seem important. Sometimes, every other part of hooking up can seem small in comparison.

But just because oral sex doesn’t involve actual intercourse, does that mean it shouldn’t be treated seriously? Sometimes it seems like a lot of girls treat oral sex really casually, and they forget that it also brings along the risks of STDs. It turns out that the editors of have different opinions on the topic. Check out what we think, and let us know your opinion.


Um, yeah… definitely needs to be past third.

Julie Says: It’s More Serious Than Sex!
Whoever it was who invented the make out bases and put oral sex somewhere between third base and home plate, I’ve got a bone to pick with you. In my not so humble opinion, oral sex is the ultimate in intimacy. Like, way, way past home base. Somewhere behind the catcher. There are such high levels of connection and comfort needed to make oral sex pleasurable that it feels very separate from the usual rounding the bases and making out. So, calling oral sex a make out? Not in my book and not on my playing field.


Would you hook up with this banana?

Melanie Says: It Can Be Way Too Unsafe
Okay, I’m going to sound like a total prude, but oral sex is totally a big deal and shouldn’t be considered on the same level as just making out—even though I know it sometimes is. Let’s just go from a germ/disease/health level here, since I know the whole “intimacy” thing is pretty subjective. If you’ve just met a guy or are just getting to know him, how the hell do you know where that thing has been? He could have creep-fest STDs (even if he says he’s clean!) or just be . . . dirty. I mean, if an unpeeled banana fell onto the sidewalk, you wouldn’t pick it up and stick it in your mouth just because it “looked okay,” would you? His junk is basically that banana—covered in invisible funk. I guess it’s to each their own, but I’d never ever go there without really knowing a guy (and his health status) first. Ick!


Nakey time? A little more intense.

Jessica Says: It’s Not That Serious
I have to say that, in my opinion, oral sex really isn’t that big of a deal. It’s not like I’m running around participating in it with everyone who I hook up with, but it’s just not something I see as very serious. In fact, I’ve noticed that in my relationships, and in my friends’ relationships, oral sex is done way before intercourse. And once we’re in relationships, it’s expected to happen a lot.  It’s not that I don’t think oral sex is an intimate thing – it is – but I just don’t think it’s nearly as intimate as intercourse.



Who do you agree with? Tell us in the comments.


Do you have to tell your partner if you’re a virgin? Join the debate!


Posted in: Discuss, Discuss, Down There, Health, Health, Sex & Relationships, Hooking Up, Love&Sex, Relationships, Sex
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  • angelPrincess

    I started very early when I used to go for sleep overs and weekends to my best friends house. There were times when I would spend hours alone with her older brother who was in university at that stage. All of my friends had a crush on him because he was really really cute. He used to make me suck him a lot and then he would take me to the pool where he would finger me. This went on for a very long time and on my 13th birthday I lost my virginity to him. I much have given him thousands of BJs and I knew he enjoyed it because he would get so hard. I loved going to their place because I got to spend a lot of time with him.

    • concerned citizen


  • Girlsaredumb

    wheres the logic here? Are most of you that stupid? I wanna keep my virginity or not give it up yet, so I’ll let him use my face instead… and thats less intimate? Lol and ugh at the same time. I fear for this generation. Is it so you can say ya I’m a virgin, but have actually blown like ten guys? I’m also sad for all your future men who think you are decent when you feed them the virgin line. what happened to girls?

  • Julie

    I went thru a period of time in college when giving BJs was an everyday thing. At several parties the girls and I would see how many we could give. I’d give anything to get my dignity and respect back.

    Currently in a relationship and love giving oral sex. It should be taken seriously as sex.

  • candy

    i had oral sex before i had sex with my bf. he is my frist and only, i think oral sex is fine just as long as u know the person ur doing it with, and he did me wayy before i did him. its all about love and trust.

  • MmmBubble

    To me, it used to be a big deal. But then I actually gave head and now its second nature. 🙂

  • PrettyGURLRocks

    I don’t think oral sex is that “BIG OF A DEAL”. It’s not like you are planning on going around blowing EVERYBODY. Yes, it is apart of sex and it’s way different than loosing your viginity. Some girls prefer to do that then to be all the way intimate . And if you’re in a relationship with that person and you love each other dearly….
    – – Why Not ?

  • bons

    Oral sex is a serious business. If you give a blow job to one guy you give oral sex to all his partners. There has been a trend where oral sex has been the “way to go” to preserve virginity. It will definitely preserve the Hymen but you are opening yourself and others up to STD’s.
    I have a friend whose step-sister just had her tongue removed because of a tumor. The cause: STD’s. To remove the tumor the Doctors opened her jaw by cutting through the front of her mouth, down her chin and down to her throat. Fourteen hours of surgery. They replace her tongue with muscle from her arm. The next day they realized that did not work so they went in for another 11 hour and removed muscle from her leg to replace the muscle from the day before. Not only will she be unable to speak but will have to go through major physiotherapy for her arm and leg. If all goes well she will be speaking somewhat understandably with in 2 years.
    My friend say it is bad. Real bad. She is not sure if it could be worst.

    Is it worth it?

  • RegretfulGirl

    Oral sex is just as serious as sex, if not more! I think a lot of people don’t think about getting STD’s through oral sex as much as through sex, but it is very possible! I got herpes from a guy giving me oral sex. THINK TWICE BEFORE YOU DO IT!!

  • Justinlove5555

    It does not mean as much as sex. When you have sex, it’s so different. If you have oral sex, it’s not that big of a seal.

  • Sarah

    I think that oral sex isn’t that big of a deal. Like it is when it comes to STD’s! But emotional and age stuff, I just think it’s up to you. it shouldn’t be something that you need to think about as much as sex. Sex is way bigger,and means SO much more. I would highly think of sex,and i still do. But I don’t really care much to,make out,or give a blowjob. I would deffinitly make him wear a condom,if i were to give him a blowjob.

  • Saddie

    to me sex is way more intimate and oral sex isnt that big of a deal unless your lover makes it that big of a deal

  • Nancy

    Hmm, I think they’re sort of equally intimate – but sex is definitely a bigger deal to majority of people. If I told my super-sensitive parents that I gave oral to a guy they might be a little pissed at me, but if I told them I had sex they would just go insane. I think the reason why some people think oral is such a big deal is because… well, you’re kind of making your mouth dirty. And the mouth is such an important thing, from kissing to eating to breathing. Maybe some people think that they should be very careful when giving oral since it might ruin your mouth and all those other things.

  • Nikki

    I agree with Julie, it’s way more intimate than sex. From someone who has been there a few times, but only with one guy, it is a very intimate, and very sexy, thing. I’m 19 and am married to the man of my dreams, but that just doesn’t happen a lot between us. Personally, I always end up sick afterwards, so I avoid it unless he’s SUPER clean, and I really want to. He hardly does, but that’s cause I can’t explain to him what I want while he’s down there. But we’re both pretty germophobic, at least when it comes to that, so that’s the kind of thing that happens usually immediately after we take a shower together. Personally, I think that oral sex is the same as intercourse. If it wasn’t, why would it be called oral SEX?

  • abby

    I think I would honestly have oral sex than to lose my virginity. Of course no matter what he says I would put on a condom. I mean, honestly in the end, his other head will think before him and will agree to put protection on. To make things exciting, I would buy a flavored condom. Sorry for being so truthful, but I think my virginity is too sacred