lying to him

With his intense gaze he made foreign policy (something I honestly wasn’t an expert on!) seem sexy. Anyone who spoke to him for half a minute could picture him at the U.N. promoting world peace and security. His casual conversations were about Middle Eastern policy books.

So did I meet him halfway by sharing my faves, a cross section of fluffy chick lit and African American women authors? Nope. Instead I researched every word he spoke as if it was my job. When we finally hung out he wanted to talk war strategies but I just wanted to watch the Grammy Awards. It sucked.

That’s my story, but I’m sure you’ve got one of your own: Have you ever pretended to rock out to homeboy’s headbanging tunes when you’d rather nod your head to hip hop? Maybe you’ve acted like a hardcore football fan when you don’t know the difference between a touchdown and a punt. Are you that girl who sits there giggling to his jokes about–well you’re not quite sure–but you’re laughing along anyway?

If you are doing any of these things, my beautiful one, you are officially trying to lie your way into love. This is never a cute way to get the guy, so um, stop it right now.

Three reasons why lying your way into love is lame (and doesn’t work):

1. He won’t get to know the real you.

You are selling yourself short by not being your full, magnificent self. When you pretend to be into something for a guy he is not getting to know the real you. He’s getting to know your representative, a character that you are playing for the moment.

2. When you wear a mask, your real tribe can’t find you.

Suppose that you were secretly a green elf. Weird, but go with me. You are a green elf but you wear a mask every day because you want some boy to like you.

What you don’t realize is that the guy sitting next to him is a secret green elf too. You’re both wearing masks so you don’t recognize each other. It’s too bad because you’d be perfect together.

As for the guy you like, he’s got a crush on that blue elf next door because she’s totally unique. Who wants someone exactly like them anyway?

3. You’re too awesome to sell yourself short.

You don’t need to be a clone to get the guy. How cool would it be if you could both share who you are with each other! What if you let him in on your secret Hot Wheels collection and he gives you the scoop on why he thinks he may become a chef?

The best relationships are the ones where two people meet each other halfway. When you like someone of course you want them to like you back, but at what cost? The cost of your true personality is too high a price to pay.

Be who you are without apology. After all, you are one wonderfic girl. If someone doesn’t like who you are that’s their loss. Enjoy being your self with all of the coolness and geekiness that entails. Go you!

Have you ever pretended to be someone you’re not just to get the attention of someone cute? Tell us all about it in comments!

Now, read on to Find Out If That Cute Guy Is Into You!

lying to him

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