Body Talk: I Hated My Big Boobs

Heidi contemplates getting big boobs

Heidi chose to get big, melon-sized boobs. I didn't!

The first major fight I had with my mom wasn’t about a boy or about staying out late, it was about my body. My boobs to be precise. It was the summer before I started middle school, and my mom took me to the lingerie section of our local department store during our back to school shopping spree.

“Your boobs are too big to not have any support,” my mom angrily whispered while I tried to run out of the dressing room.

“None of my friends wear a bra!” I hissed back and distinctively remember throwing the stark white, cotton thing at her head.

I’ll never forget my first day at our new school. Out of nowhere, my friend Jenny snuck up behind me and screamed out, “Lauren! Are you wearing a bra!?” Without missing a beat, she reached behind me and snapped my bra right at the hook. It hurt and I was sure she made a mark but I just pretended like it didn’t happen. All of my other friends were flat as pancakes. The bra outline in my clothes was like this signal to the world that screamed, “Check this girl out! She’s going through puberty at lightning speed!” At lunchtime, I slipped into the bathroom, unhooked my bra, slipped it out through my sleeve and threw it in the garbage.

Kirsten's bikini top wouldn't hold my big boobs

Kirsten's bikini top wouldn't hold my big boobs.

In the years after that, my boobs got way bigger. I’ve never really been able to get away with halter tops or those cute little bikini tops you see celebs wearing on the beach. There were days when I wondered if I lost a few pounds if my boobs would get a little smaller and then there were times that I thought about getting a push-up bra to make them look perkier. I even tried to hide my boobs with minimizer bras (not so comfy!).

A few years after high school graduation, I had a bunch of girls over to my apartment to order in dinner and watch TV. Someone commented on how they thought Katie Holmes had the perfect face and body and that triggered a body image bitch fest. Everyone started wishing they looked like Katie and complaining about one of their own features that they weren’t happy with. One complained of being too hairy, another of having thunder thighs and someone else couldn’t stand the bump on the bridge of her nose. The funny thing was every complaint was met with a chorus of responses like “Are you serious? I would kill for your full eyebrows” or “Lucky! You have the best nose.”

Christina Hendrinks has big boobs and looks great

Christina Hendricks makes her curves look gorgeous

The same happened when I complained about my big boobs. Everyone else groaned and told me I was lucky that I could hold up strapless dresses and that I didn’t look like a little boy. I’d never even thought about what it might like to be on the other side of the situation and was really surprised to hear those things.

I started to realize that the things we dislike about ourselves are often the things that others would love to have. I started to make a more conscious effort not to be hard on myself about my looks—especially my boobs—around my friends. I didn’t want us getting in the habit of using our time together to break ourselves down. And I made looking at myself in the mirror a time to build myself up—not pick myself apart. It was then that I could begin to look at my boobs as an asset—not a curse.

Instead of uncomfortable minimizer bras, I started treating myself to sexier styles. Instead of oversize shirts, I learned to shop for clothes that accentuated my boobs (in a classy way). Today my boobs don’t define me, they don’t embarrass me, they don’t bother me—they’re simply a part of me that I couldn’t imagine looking any other way.

Do you wish your boobs were a different size? Smaller or bigger? Tell us in the comments!

Want more? Check out how this tall girl came to love her height.

Posted in: Being Yourself, Body Image, Sucky Emotions, Uncategorized, Your Life
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  • Troof Detector

    Women learn to wipe your asses better!

  • Neda

    My main concern is just I’m going into highschool this year and I don’t want to be stared at by guys, I DONT CARE IF GUYS LIKE BIG BOOBS. I wish I could just get rid of them. I can’t even wear what clothes I want….

  • joe

    Big bobies girls

  • Robin

    I have had large boobs ever since the age of 9. and hate them to this day!!!!! I am 5ft. and feel like I’m all boobs! Sorry nothing will change this!

  • Natasha

    Hi i am 22 and i am size A is that a bad thing do guys only like girls with big boobs

    • Generic Straight Guy

      A guy liking a girl for how she looks is as shallow as a puddle of rainwater. The bigs only come into play when you want some guy to notice you more or talk to you more. Other than that it ain’t really matter that much. Big boobs can sometimes be a downside ’cause in public, you’re gonna get more eyes at the wrong position, me a guilty candidate at that.

  • Natasha

    I have big boobs too, and I have to say, THEY ARE NOTHING TO BE ASHAMED ABOUT! When you get older, you realize what a blessing it is, and not just that others don’t have ’em, but you realize that (some)guys love big boobs. I remember that when I was younger, I hated them because they bounced MAJOR when I ran. When you guys get older, you’ll realize how sexy your F-cup boobs when you’re cozy in bed with that special someone.

  • April

    im 15 and i wear a 34 A, i constantly wish i could at least fill a small B. My best friend on the other hand, can fit a double D and she wishes she had smaller boobs and complains about hers all the time. seeing girls like her complaining makes me feel more comfortable with my current breast size

  • ssarah

    got my 1st bra at 8……
    im 13 and i have 26G boobs! and still growing!!!!
    im pleeding my mom for a reduction!
    i hate them!