Debate Club: How Long Can You Date Someone You Know You’ll Never Love?

Dating just for fun: yay or nay?

Okay, so you’re dating this really awesome person. You two have a seriously great time together. But honestly? You’re not in it for the long-term, and you know you’re not in love. So what should you do – stick around and have fun until it fizzles out, or end things immediately because you know it’s not going to last? Should you be in love with everyone you ever date?

This question got the editors of thinking… and obviously coming up with totally different viewpoints. We want to know what you girls have to say about it. So read our thoughts, and then tell us: how long should you be with someone you know you’ll never love?


Hiking alone? Way more satisfying than a pointless relationship.

Julie Says: Don’t Waste Your Time
You’re not 100% into your relationship? Get the heck out! You’re wasting valuable time you could be spending finding the honey of your dreams. And even if you don’t find The One right away, you might find something else you love more than your semi-dud of a dude or dudette. For example, did you know that hiking is basically walking in the woods with tons of snacks…and it’s awesome? Well, I didn’t until I broke up with my meh boyfriend and went for a walk to kill the time I used to spend watching him play video games. (Seriously, who was I?) Now I love hiking and I was never, ever going to really love him. My new motto? Just say no to anything but the real thing.



We <3 Edward, but maybe he's a little too intense...

Melanie Says: Why Not Just Have Fun?
You know how in “Twilight” (any of the movies, really!) you never see Bella smile that much? Could be because she’s in high school, a time when she should be having tons of fun, but she’s too busy being wrapped up in a super intense, life-or-death relationship to really enjoy it. I’m not saying that a “til never shall we part” relationship can’t work out when you’re young—a small number actually do—but my point is that high school relationships rarely last forever, and that you’re better off having fun with somebody you really like than waiting around for true, deep, Bella-Edward-esque lurve. You’ll have plenty of time to find your own special sparkle vamp later on. Promise.




Blair is so not as into Louis as he's into her. We all know she still loves Chuck.

Jessica Says: Think About How Your Sweetie Feels
I see nothing wrong with dating someone you know you’re not going to marry. If you’re having a good time and just living in the moment? Awesome. Not every relationship has to be (or should be!) totally serious. But here’s the thing: I think it’s only okay if your sweetie feels the same way as you do. If you’re with someone who’s head-over-heels in love with you, and you don’t feel nearly as serious, you should get the heck out of that relationship. Frankly, I think not ending it is kind of selfish. If you know you’re not in love with this person and you know you never will be, and they’re already hearing wedding bells, you’re going to break their heart. I say, no one deserves to be strung along like that – and you know you wouldn’t want it to happen to you.



Who do you agree with most? Have you ever dated someone you knew you would never love? Tell us in the comments.

Posted in: Discuss, Discuss, Health, Sex & Relationships, Love&Sex, Relationships
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    I have exactly what Jessica said… He seems to really like me, but I don’t even have a CRUSH on him, let alone being in love. I’m gunna feel like a complete bitch when I end it, but that’s better than letting him think I feel the same when I don’t

  • prizel

    i agree with jessica
    i am currently dating someone whom i dont love at all…
    but whats the problem..
    i am enjoying the present moment
    the day i meet someone i fall head over heels,,,,,,,,, the current date is over……
    till than why not have some fun

  • Caitlin

    I agree with Jessica the most.
    There’s definitely nothing wrong with a fun relationship, just as long as the feeling is mutual on both sides and you’re not leading someone on.