Dig or Diss: Families With Tons Of Kids

tons of kids!

The Brady Bunch made six kids seem like a lot!

So, you know that Duggar family? The one with tons of kids—19 to be exact? Yeah, well they’re about to have another little one join the family, making it 20 kids in all.

I’m all for women doing what they want to with their bodies, and having kids or not having kids depending on what’s right for them, but I have to wonder if it’s fair to the kids themselves to have so many brothers and sisters.

tons of kids

The new definition of "big family!"

I mean, I’m not a parent or anything, but I know when you’re little there’s kind of nothing you want or need more than your parents’ time and attention. Who else is going to teach you how to bake cookies, tie your shoes, and braid your hair? And when you’re just one out of tons of kids, chances are, you’re not getting a lot of alone time with mom or dad. I mean, I guess when you’ve got 19 brothers and sisters, one of them could help out—but should kids really have to help out with parenting? Is it fair of the Duggars to force that on their children?

tons of kids!

Mary-Kate and Ashley have an older brother, younger sister, and two half siblings.

On the other hand, I come from a family with just two kids, and although my sister and I had a stupid amount of fun together (hi Melissa!), I know from some of my friends that having tons of kids in your family can have its perks, too. Say you want to play soccer? You’ve got a ready-made team. Putting on a play in the back yard? The seats will be filled, even if just your brothers and sisters show up.

WDYT? Are you digging or dissing on big families? Do you wish you had more siblings to hang with? Tell us in the comments!

Posted in: Being Yourself, Uncategorized, Your Life
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  • Anonymous

    I think a decent sized family (when I say decent, I mean 4 or 5) is perfectly fine, but 20? That’s a bit over-the-top. It really does depend on the family, but for me, I think my maximum would be 4. =)

  • Frances

    I don’t think big families are great and I come from one. I have an older sister, two younger sisters and a younger brother. I have to do a lot of chores, grow up fast, watch my younger siblings get more attention then I ever got, live up to my older sister’s record (which is perfection she studied abroad and is ms goody goody two shoes), and my parents are never invested as much as they could or available when I need them. When I come home from school I’m expected to go upstairs and do my homework and if I have a school project I can forget asking a parent to help me. They always say your old enough you can do it on your own. Yeah, but what if I want your help or maybe this is something we could do together? I also don’t get to talk to my mom or dad often. They are up all day with my siblings and then at night they’re tired and want to relax. I say big families only hurt the kids.

  • Brittany

    I feel that couples with 20 kids like the duggars are just wrong. As much as children are a blessing, I feel that those parents are being kinda selfish…..just doing it for attention. The old 70’s show, the Waltons, is different. The walton couple had 7 kids who they all cared for and loved, maybe thats becuase it took place in the 40’s. Getting back to reality, I feel that any more than 5 births (meaning twins count as one birth) is just too much. I myself, am the oldest of 3, all girls. Even with 2 other siblings, I sometimes feel lost even though I’m the oldest.

  • Anonymous

    I don’t think that all big families are a bad idea.. but the Duggars are taking it to a level I find disturbing. For one I can guarantee absolutely none of their children are getting the attention they need to grow fully, and being home schooled with no outside influences or experiences other than their parents borderlines a cult to me nevermind the fact that being home schooled makes it incredibly difficult to ease into society without having ever really been in contact with other people. There’s the health issue for the mother as we’re discovering. And lets not forget that earth is incredibly overpopulated as it is using up far more resources than is available and there’s just no space.

  • Chalice

    I agree, having such a large number of siblings doesn’t always sound like such a great thing from the kid’s perspective–little parent time, lack of privacy and space, lots of room for friction, fights, and rivalry, and little resources to be spread over the whole group. Probably because I didn’t grow up in a family with a lot of kids, I look at the idea as if it is a constant struggle–maybe it comes easier to those kids that have that kind of family. They probably feel less lonely than I did (my siblings are much older than me). As for the parents–I feel like having that number of children should only be okay when they have a sizable amount of wealth secured, lots of love and time, and plenty of space…having a lot of kids under any other circumstance seems irresponsible to me.

  • Maggie

    Sure, a lot of that sounds great, but there’s also the sibling rivalry to take into account. Sometimes being in a big family can make you feel more alone than if you were on your own. If you’re the oldest, you get roped into babysitting where the entire time is spent breaking up fights or being insulted. You never seem to have your own space, you always have to make room for at least three or more people. If you’re older, then you always have to keep everything you say or do around your siblings at a PG rating, and trust me, there’s ALWAYS someone around. Sure, there are good stuff, but a lot of times they’re hard to see. It must be really hard for those kids. I agree up there, it doesn’t seem fair for the kids. Seems more like a publicity stunt or something to me.

    I am the oldest of six kids. I am 18, and the youngest is 5.