Can I Go On The Pill Without Telling My Parents?

Should you keep it a secret?

Hi Heather,

I am almost 16 and I want to go on the pill. I am not very close to my doctor (like I haven’t even met him yet, just his assistant.) I am not planning on having sex but I want it as a back up just in case. My problem is that I don’t want my mom to know about it. How can I see my doctor without her knowing? I understand that my doctor can’t say anything to her but I am under such a close eye with my mom. What should I do?

I think it’s great that you’re planning so far in advance about protecting yourself during sex. However, and I know you don’t want to hear this, but it would also be great for you to talk about it with your mom too.

Keeping this a secret from your mom is possible, but could be tough. Not only are you going to be stressing over whether she’s going to catch you in this lie, but you’re also going to have to handle the cost of the Pill on your own. And it can wind up costing quite a bit. Planned Parenthood gives teens free birth control without telling their parents, but if you go through a regular doctor (which it sounds like you’re planning on), then you have to pay for it. Also, paying for the pill through health insurance will be cheaper than going without, but your health insurance is probably through your parents. So, you mom would find out that way.

If you really feel like you can’t tell your mom, then I’d suggest finding a Planned Parenthood near you. While you shouldn’t be lying to your parents, when it comes to sex, it’s certainly better to be safe than sorry. And cost shouldn’t prevent you from making smart sexual health decisions. But before you go for the Pill on the sly, try explaining the situation to your mom first. Maybe she’ll understand better than you think.

Also, keep in mind that the Pill does not protect against STD’s or AIDS. Always use a condom no matter what!

WDYT, gURLs? Are you secretly on the Pill? How should this gURL talk to her mom about going on birth control? Give us your advice and discuss below.

take care,


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Posted in: Body & Health, Body Issues, Family, Help Me Heather, Help&Advice, Love Advice, Sex
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  • Acsia

    About a year and half ago, me and my boyfriend started getting really serious. We talked about getting intimate and stuff but I refused too unless I was on the pill and we of course had protection. I was actually hesitant about telling my highly religious mother about me wanting to get intimate before marriage so I put it off a whole till I finally decided to ask her to take me to the clinic and help me get started on it. At first she was hesitant but then she gave up and said she can’t stop me for doing it and I was very wise for wanting to be safe so she gave in. So basically, telling your mom would probably be the best in your situation cause all she wants is for you to be safe and you will probably need your moms help if she can easily find out anyways. Hope all goes well!