Recently, a lot of my friends have been drinking, “getting off” with guys, been getting into smoking and drugs and wearing VERY different clothing such as tight tops, short skirts, large heels, etc. I personally think they shouldn’t. They’re underage, acting stupid and being extremely immature. Of course, I’m the only one who thinks this though.
Constantly I feel as if I’m a goody-two-shoes, or that I’m just plain dull and boring and different and I hate it! My “friends” are saying I should live a little, get out there, update my wardrobe, be more fashionable (as in, dress like a slut) and I should try alcohol. I keep saying no, I’m not the type to crack under peer pressure. But I’m starting to feel so babyish and unwanted by people.
Should I help them? Should I stay away? Should I live a little, join them, perhaps? Am I doing something wrong? Am I normal? Should I drop them? Should I tell an adult what’s happening, as none know? UUUGGGHHH! Please help me, I don’t know what to do.
I’ll be blunt: peer pressure sucks. It’s never fun to deal with, and it sucks even more when it’s your best friends who are doing it to you. I know it’s tough, but in this situation the most important thing to do is to stick to what you believe in and what feels right and comfortable for you.
There is no reason for you to feel baby-ish or boring. Doing drugs, drinking when you’re underage and hooking up does not make you an adult, and it does not mean you’re “cool.” If that’s not something you want to do, then you should never feel like you have to do it in order to fit in with your friends. If they’re going to make you feel bad about that, then honestly, they aren’t really great friends.
You sound like a totally normal gURL to me! There’s nothing wrong with you just because you don’t want to participate in these (mostly illegal) activities. You sound like you have a good head on your shoulders, so just be strong, and continue to do only what makes you comfortable. If you do end up giving in just to feel wanted, you’ll end up regretting it.
WDYT, gURLs? Have your friends ever peer pressured you? Can you relate to this situation? Do you ever feel the same way? Give us your advice and discuss below.
What’s on your mind? Heather can help! Send her your question at firstname.lastname@example.org.