Well, I like my best friend’s BF. We were really good friends until they started dating — then we grew farther apart. They have been dating for 10 months now, and me and him have started getting closer. I feel like a horrible person for liking him, but I can’t help it. She has no idea that I like him and neither does he. Am I a bad friend?? What should I do?
This is definitely a tough situation and I understand why you feel so guilty, but at the same time, you shouldn’t beat yourself up. Sometimes we can’t help who we like or have feelings for. This is just something we don’t always have control over, and it doesn’t make you a bad friend.
You have a decision you need to make. The fact is, if you end up pursuing this guy, there’s a big possibility it could ruin your friendship with your BFF. Is this guy really worth losing your best friend over? If he is, then you need to ‘fess up and be honest with her about your feelings. But keep in mind that they’re in a relationship — there’s a really good chance he”s happy with her and doesn’t want things with her to end.
If you don’t want to lose your best friend, then you should try to distance yourself from her BF, as hard as it may be to lose him as a friend. Be on the lookout for a new guy to like: preferably someone who is single and can give you all the attention you deserve.
Just think about which relationship is ultimately more important to you. It sounds corny, but you kind of need to follow your heart on this one.
WDYT, gURLs? Have you ever liked your friend’s sweetie? Have you ever had to make a choice between a crush and a friend? What would you do in this situation? Give us your advice and discuss below!
What’s on your mind? Heather can help! Send her your question at firstname.lastname@example.org.