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Hey Heather,
Well, I like my best friend’s BF. We were really good friends until they started dating — then we grew farther apart. They have been dating for 10 months now, and me and him have started getting closer. I feel like a horrible person for liking him, but I can’t help it. She has no idea that I like him and neither does he. Am I a bad friend?? What should I do?
This is definitely a tough situation and I understand why you feel so guilty, but at the same time, you shouldn’t beat yourself up. Sometimes we can’t help who we like or have feelings for. This is just something we don’t always have control over, and it doesn’t make you a bad friend.
You have a decision you need to make. The fact is, if you end up pursuing this guy, there’s a big possibility it could ruin your friendship with your BFF. Is this guy really worth losing your best friend over? If he is, then you need to ‘fess up and be honest with her about your feelings. But keep in mind that they’re in a relationship — there’s a really good chance he”s happy with her and doesn’t want things with her to end.
If you don’t want to lose your best friend, then you should try to distance yourself from her BF, as hard as it may be to lose him as a friend. Be on the lookout for a new guy to like: preferably someone who is single and can give you all the attention you deserve.
Just think about which relationship is ultimately more important to you. It sounds corny, but you kind of need to follow your heart on this one.
WDYT, gURLs? Have you ever liked your friend’s sweetie? Have you ever had to make a choice between a crush and a friend? What would you do in this situation? Give us your advice and discuss below!
take care,
heather
What’s on your mind? Heather can help! Send her your question at heather@gurl.com.
This is going on with me right now! My Bestfriend didn’t know I had a crush on this boy and now she’s dating him she had a crush on him too an I didn’t know! They’ve been dating for 3 days. I have liked him ever since I saw him on the first day of school this year. but she’s prettier and everything she is a twin ad everyone loves the twins bc they are really hot even the 2 grades up us are hitting on them whether they have a bf or not. And all of my friends have boyfriends and he’s not really her type he’s more of my type she’s to Pretty for him. It’s just not fair bc everyone thought we’d be a super cute couple and now they r together all of my friends wanted to ask him out for me but I don’t think asking a boy out is right. But like they say the prettier girls will always get the boys bc they have dated all of the hot football players this year and its just I’m so jello of them. -_-
So, I like my friend Leslie’s boyfriend, and I told her and she was totally cool about it…I fell really bad still especially because we went ice skating and since me and Paul-the dude I like-can’t skate he asked me to hold hands with him, I did which was awkward….Then we spent like the whole day together and Leslie wasn’t there… He is really sweet and I feel bad because Leslie is freaking awesome…She told me though that she might break up with him before Christmas so I could have him then. Help me please!!!
So I found out that this close friend of mine liked me. And I really liked him back. But then he asked out my best friend. They broke up and now he’s dating my other best friend. He knows I still like him and I think he still likes me, but I don’t know what to do anymore.
I like my best friends boyfriend. I have known him for 12 years now and went to school and everything with him. We all go to the same school now and he’s in all my classes… But so is she. They have been going out for about 2 years but barely hangout I mean it’s weird. Me and him are literally best friends and I have recently started falling for him. All my friends say how obvious it is that he likes me but I don’t see it. Or maybe I do, and I just don’t want too. I feel so guilty because his girlfriend has no idea. He’s an amazing kid, actually perfect for me, everything I’ve ever wanted, but I can’t have it. Everyone says something is going to happen when they break up, but neither one of them would ever break up, they’re too scared. Should I distance myself from one of my best friends because other people think it’s obvious that he likes me? I just need some help, thanks! -Laura
I dated this one boy. We broke up but I still like him I dropped hints but now he is dating my bestie he seems to like me still. I am not sure what to do I want to date him again but not hurt her feelings!
I sorta dated this dude who is now dating my BFF but i’m still kinda into him and i thinhe still likes me i don’t know what to do!
I’m going through the same thing! my new best friend has got a new boyfriend. But this new boyfriend might of liked me before she stole him..I just didnt show interest in him and now that I am he’s been texting me some. They’ve been having some problems lately..she always gets upset with him and he gets upset with her. So I am right in the middle of this argument while i think i have feelings for him..but then again i was kind of “talking” with another guy and now he is of no interest. MY BFFS BOYFRIEND IS ON MY MIND.
Hey have the same problem… I gave the guy signas and waited for his reply andi got them back up… He told her that he likes me… And the funny thing was she like his bff so I got him all to myself…
But you never know.. Just send him the signals and wait for him.if he doesnt reply back off.,;-)
I like my best friends boy friends boy friend and she likes my boy friend. But I like my boy friend a lot and it doesn’t look like there going to breakup soon. No one knows I like him except for him. I flirt with him but I flirt with a lot of people. People always said I was a flirt. It’s just different with him I can’t talk and when I do it’s something stupid. With my boyfriend I’m so happy and I can talk to him easily but I dont get to see him as much.
Okay, well I have really liked on of my best friends bf for quiet some time now. They havee only been dating for a little less than a month. I learned yesterday that he likes me to though, because we were talking and he told me. I’m so confused on what to do. :/
i started talking to him last year and then he n my bff strtd dating each other….i got 2 knoe this after i realized i had started liking him…tht ws a very tough time…i had 2 chose either of them….i finally chose my freind as i knoe her since such a long time n i didnt wantd 2 hurt her moreovr both of them were doing gr8 2gther so i preferred keeping my feelings aside…they dnt know anything abt me liking him n all tht stuff…both consider me as their best freind…n many a times m d messenger between both f them..during such situations i feel awful…bt its ok…i dnt wanna hurt both f them….m trying to moveon and stay away frm him bt he doesnt let this happen:(
Me and him are really close friends and him and my bff just berrily started dating on friday but I still have feelings for him and I don’t want to hurt my friend. What could I do?
Guys can’t be stolen. If he really wants to be with her, he’ll stay, if he was to go with you, he would have left her anyway. Women don’t have to compete, we just set up society like that. It’s unnecessary. See what happens.
I did,and I was upfront with her about it. We talk like normal friends,and he talks to other girls too. All we do is hug,and he always hugs me. And he hugs other girls. The other day she got pissed at me for that,and she shouldn’t just be mad at me because I’m not the only girl he talks to. She acts like I’m having sex with her boyfriend and I’m not. I don’t do drama so I just said screw it to both of them…..I don’t wanna do that mess,just no. And I asked permission to talk to him, which i shouldn’t have to do. she shouldn’t be able to control whom i’m friends with. and she said she didn’t care i thought he was cute…….wtf.