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It's not for everybody...
Hi Heather,
So I’ve been thinking really, really long and hard about my religion. I was raised a Catholic and most of my family (including my aunts, uncles, and cousins, even second cousins) are Roman Catholic as well. My parents are super religious and they thoroughly believe in God.
I’ve thought about it for 2-3 years and I’ve decided that Catholicism isn’t for me. I just don’t feel comfortable being Catholic. I just don’t believe in God. Not to be offensive in any way, but I don’t think there’s a point to religion. And I’m planning to tell my parents soon, but I’m scared to. I’m scared of how they’ll react or if they’ll get mad. And I don’t know exactly how to tell them. I’m making a point to tell them really soon, since I’m supposed to start Confirmation classes. What should I do?
Religion should be a personal choice, not something that you’re forced into. This might be a difficult thing to tell your family, but if you know that this isn’t the right religion for you, then it’s important that you stay true to your beliefs. I’m glad you realize you need to be honest with your parents. It probably won’t be easy to talk about, but it’s the right thing to do.
The best thing is to just be completely straight up with your mom and dad. Tell them how long you’ve been thinking about this, and explain that you just don’t feel right practicing this religion anymore. Explain exactly how you feel and how passionate you are about it. Let them know you’re not trying to hurt them at all, it’s just something you feel you need to do for yourself.
Your parents reaction might be a little scary — just make sure you stay calm and controlled no matter what. That helps to show them that you’re mature enough to make this decision on your own. Stick by your beliefs. Just because Cath0licism is something your whole family practices doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you for not wanting to be a part of it.
WDYT, gURLs? Have you ever decided to change your religion? Do you and your family disagree on faith? Give us your advice and discuss below!
take care,
heather
What’s on your mind? Heather can help! Send her your question at heather@gurl.com.
Can You Trust Him?
I was Catholic when I was six, and when I was old enough to really think for myself, I settled on my own beliefs. Just so happens I live in a hugely crazy neighborhood, and I’ve been putting up with a lot of crap for not being Christian, and, in one case, for being vegetarian. Also, some people beat up our mailbox when we put out our Obama sign.
@mary: ikr! my whole family is methodist and my dad was a pastor, but i dont want to be cofined in a religon! i just want to be me, and i dont see me being fitted into the box that we call ‘religon’!
I know how you feel. My family is Methodist, and they don’t seem really religious, but they call me a heathen jokingly whenever I say I don’t want to go to church and the do religious things every now and then. I don’t fell I can tell them. Even worse, my best friend in the whole world is really religious and though I’m sure it would only make things a bit awkward at first for us, I’d be worried about her parents “breaking us up” for good. I’ve just decided to keep it to myself for now. It’s not a huge factor in my life now, so I’ll just stay quiet.
I come from a family of very mixed religions, and I was always told to just believe in what I thought was right. My Roman Catholic cousins, my Atheist brother, my Agnostic mother, Baptist father, Pagan aunt and cousin, Protestant grandmother, and Jewish cousins were all pretty okay with me dabbling in each religion before settling on being Agnostic.
I just hate it when agnostic and atheism people think that christianity is like… bad or something or unfair or racist or whatever. Im a christian and my sis is agnostic and she keeps on going on and on about how the bible doesnt make sense and christianity is unfair . instead of feeling like im forced into being a christian i choose my own way of believing in God. and there is a point to religion. WHAT DO U THINK IS GUNNA HAPPEN WHEN THE WORLD ENDS?! im sorry but as a christian i believe when we all die the ones that dont believe in the point of religion or God will be very ashamed. very. The majority of christians nowadays are sickening. some people will say they are christians when they go out and get drunk and gets tats and have sex and all that crap! THATS WHY everybody who isnt christians picture us as…… people who dont believe in equalism and dont beleive in pre-marital sex. THATS HOW PEOPLE THINK OF CHRISTIANS NOWADAYS AND IT MAKES ME SICK. there are true christians out there! probably not many but whatever. im so sick of being around people who judge religion. religion , muslim, catholic whatever! religion is suposed to give you a sense of IDENTITY ! it ISNT pointless. A PERSON IS NOTHING WITHOUT a sense of identity. RELIGION is a beautiful thing.
Hi everyone, I just wanted to put this out there, seeing as nobody has talked about this yet.
I’m an atheist. I find it irritating that everyone seems to think we’re all racist, and don’t accept religion at all. This is untrue- Atheism isn’t about hating all religion and trying to make everyone feel the same way, it’s about scientific theories and ideas. It’s almost like a religion in itself, we have beliefs and not everybody agrees. Just because I don’t believe in God and do believe in things which make sense to me doesn’t make me a racist, a bad person, or anything like that. You are entitled to have an opinion and be a part of whatever religion you choose, but it was never for me.
This may sound a bit random, but I just wanted any other Atheist gURLS out there that you don’t have to hide what you believe in because you’re afraid people will think you’re a racist.
I’m agnostic, and I agree. I don’t think religion is right for me. If I try to tell people at school that I am they start going off on me. It sucks how they think they’re alowed to troll MY beliefs.
I’m Muslim too. I like it,and the way we gather together for parties and stuff. I don’t cover my head though.I’m 14 btw. But it’s not compulsry even if your an adult. If you believe in covering it then you can.they aren’t that many Muslims in my school so I can’t really talk to anyone about my religion. Glad to know there are Muslims here too:D
Yayyy, #MuslimSolidarity! I gotta say though, while I admit to not always covering my head, it’s important to remember that wearing the headscarf IS part of Islam and being a Muslim. One of the reasons Islam is the fastest growing faith in the world is that people in other religions have gotten so lax about living the laws of their religion that people can’t take them seriously. We can’t let that happen to Islam.
[Disclaimer: I know I just made a generalization. I mean no offense to any non-Muslim. Just making a point to my little sister about the hijab
]
Yeah, I had this same feeling about not believing in God and I just talked to my mom about it and it was really easy. She was totally calm about it and told me about how she had the same feelings to at some point in her life. And when we just talked about it, I realized that I really did have this faith that there was a God out there. And I feel better about it. But I can see why you may not feel right with the Catholic religion. There’s so many contradictions.
Well my mom’s side of the family are Muslims, and I still can’t figure out how to tell them I’ve given up Islam more than 2 years ago. As a girl I’m finding it impossible to accept wearing a headscarf, as well as all the other rules regarding women’s freedom. I’m not being forced into being a Muslim, but it is expected from me, so I’m just scared to dissapoint my family, or to be rejected.
Apologies if I offended anyone, I accept that my way of thinking isn’t everyone else’s.
Im in the same position but only started thinking about this two days ago..i kno its a short time but i feel so strong about this. My bro who is one yr olda den me is beeh religious, my dad dnt live wi me n my mom aint religious buh calls herself a muslim……the baddest thing is that one one my close mate is really religious and keeps telling me to say things wen eating or b fr an exam n i dnt kno y i shud wen it kinda dnt mean eni thing to me no more….also my oda friend is becoming religious too so i feel bad n scared if i say summin. There is my third and final friend aint really religious so i cn tell her buh if i tell her she will tell the other two n im worried incase skl finds out as like 70% r muslims and out of that 50% of them r strong believers…ahkk this is my plan ima turn 18 n go to anova country n start there with or wiv out dem.
I don’t know what the hell is going on here, but it seems something wrong in the Christian World, I don’t know what is it cause I’m living in Iraq. My parents didn’t force me about anything, I studied the most 3 famous religions in the world (Christian, Islam and jewish) and I found that (Islam) is the best one (at least for me)….. sorry if I hurt anyone. but this is the truth…
Well as a muslim i can tell you , you have made the right choice.
Make sure to take your Shahada before its too late .
Im soo happy for another person to convert as islam is the
fasted growing of this day .
Mashallah sister ,
as a young person you may hide it from your parents ,
& even wear the hijab a little bit late due to the incovinience
that may start once youve told them , but if they are understanding
go ahead .
Hello gURL.
I’m in a simalar position. My dad was Church of England and that’s what I was christened. My mum, however, was Catholic and gave me her confirmation dress when I was younger (we got rid of it as I grew out of it) and I really want to get confirmed but I don’t like Church of England. I’m 13 now and I want to get my religion sorted as I’ve had enough of it. I haven’t given much thought on which one I want to change to but I’m desperate to get out of Church of England. No offence meant to anybody who is a COE.
xxx