I don’t feel at home with my family. My parents are separated but I have always lived with my mom and my step-father and half-sister (even though I consider her my real sister). Lately I feel like I am just a burden to the family. My dad has brought my mom to court. Me and my dad have never really gotten along. When I try to talk to my mom about it, she tells me that there are people in a much worse state than I am and everybody has difficulty growing up, and my problem is just minor.
Also, at home I am miserable. My mom never compliments me or says she is proud of me. The other day I told my mom that I thought I was gaining weight (I don’t really think I am and I have been skinny my whole life) and she told me to stop eating so many sweets. Am I asking too much of my family or should I give them a rest and go live in a group home (as I have been considering)?
I’m sorry you feel so out of place with your family. Divorce and separation are so hard for any teen gURL — but you need to remember that none of this is your fault, and you are not a burden. Leaving your family and considering going to a group home are definitely not good options. You and your parents might have hit a rough patch, but you need to try to work things out before you think about that.
You need to have a serious conversation with your mom. The stress of the separation, especially going to court with your dad, is probably what’s making her act the way she is. While it’s true that some people might have more serious problems than this, that doesn’t make your emotions any less valid or important.
You need to tell your mom exactly how you feel, and let her know that she’s really hurting you when she ignores you. Tell her her opinion means a lot to you, and you want her to be proud of you. You need to be totally honest with her. If this doesn’t help at all, try talking to a school counselor. As for your dad, you need to talk to him also and let him know you want to work on your relationship with him.
Be patient, because family issues don’t go away quickly. You should never feel like a burden to your parents — they love you, even when it seems like they don’t.
WDYT, gURLs? Are your parents divorced or separated? How do you deal with it? Do you ever feel like a burden to your family? Discuss below!
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