I recently started dating someone 3 weeks ago. I met him in the beginning of this summer and we immediately hit it off. Within the week, we started dating and it’s been great. But I’ve been having doubts these couple of days about the whole thing. We’ve been hanging out nearly every day since I met him and I think I’m starting to get sick of him. I get annoyed and aggravated whenever someone mentions him or our relationship. He’s very good to me unlike my previous relationships and he calls/texts every day to see how I’m doing. He’s a great guy, but that doesn’t stop me from wondering if I made the right move to enter a relationship so quickly. I still really enjoy spending time with him, but I dread making more and more plans. It’s a feeling of claustrophobia almost. I feel like he’s getting too serious, too fast. His parents already know me and I’ve never met them, his friends all know who I am and most of them have my number, and on top of that he’s already asked me to loan him $100 (which I can do and I trust him to pay me back, but even then that’s a lot to ask). Am I getting freaked out over nothing?
The fact that you don’t want to hang out with your new guy already is definitely a sign that something is off. Whether that means that the relationship isn’t working or that you two became too serious too quickly, I’m not sure.
It might just be that you need some alone time. It’s great that your boyfriend is available and wants to talk to you and hang out with you every day, but that doesn’t necessarily mean you need to see him every day. It’s important that you two have a life outside of each other.
I think you should talk to your sweetie and tell him you feel like you might’ve rushed into things and want to take some time apart to think about things. Maybe a day. Maybe a week. Or a few weeks. Whatever you feel you need. If you’re happier without your guy in your life, than the two of you should probably call it quits.
But if you miss him, maybe you two just need to change things up. (What’s your perfect relationship? Take our survey and let us know). Make sure you have at least one or two days each week when you spend some time apart and see your friends. Check in with him everyday, but don’t feel the need to speak all day. It seems like you’re feeling a little smothered and just need some space.
Think about what you really want and how he makes you feel. But I can’t really tell you whether to keep the relationship going or not. That’s a decision that only you can make.
What do you think gURLs? Did she jump into this relationship too quickly? Should she move on or try and make it work? Discuss!
What’s on your mind? Heather can help! Send her your question at firstname.lastname@example.org.