Should I Date My Friend’s Twin Brother?

"Hey, remember me?"

Dear Heather,

I have a major issue I’m stressing over at the moment. I’ve recently started having feelings for my best guy friend, since we’ve been hanging out more. The main problem is that he’s also my good female friend’s twin brother. I know that they have a good relationship, but it’s often love-hate. I don’t know how she’d react if I told her I like her brother, especially since he’s been hanging off me for the past 3 years and I’ve been neutral towards him. What do I do? Should I tell her first? I’ve already told my best girlfriend and she’s told me to go with it. Please help!

It’s great that you and this guy have made a connection, and I’m sure your friend will be very happy to hear how happy dating her brother could make you. But before you go any further, you need to let your friend in on what’s going on.

Starting to date her brother before telling her would be leaving your friend out of the loop, and that’s the last thing you’d want in this kind of a tricky situation. Your relationship with her brother could potentially make her feel like a third wheel when he hangs out with you both, and if she feels that way she’ll probably be against you two dating from the start.

But if you go to your friend first and explain that you and her brother have feelings for each other but you wanted to make sure she was okay with it first, she’s more likely to be cool with it. Make sure your friend knows that your friendship comes first and that you wouldn’t do anything to jeopardize that. This will be difficult for her to hear, so be sensitive to her situation.

Also, make sure to include her as much as possible when you and your new guy start hanging out. Alone time with him is OK too, but she could start resenting you both if you become one of those couples who ditch their friends and family and only hang out with each other.

Good luck and take care,


What do you gURLs think? Should you ever date your best friend’s brother? Is there a way to get around this sticky situation? Discuss!

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Posted in: Dating, Friends, Help Me Heather, Help&Advice, Love Advice
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  • Chasity

    With me its different. The guy I like is a quadruplet and I know his whole family. But want 2 more than bffs

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