How Do I Deal With My BFF’s Depression?

Listening can be a huge help.

Dear Heather,

My best friend is totally suffering, her mom is emotionally abusive. She calls her fat, useless, etc. And shes not allowed to do ANYTHING. We have been friends since kindergarten, and she can’t even come over. I try to keep her spirits high, but she is always depressed in the house. I really don’t know what to do!! Please help me Heather!

It’s never easy to watch a really close friend suffer from depression. It’s totally understandable to want to be the one to make her feel better, and it’s great that you care this much about your best friend. But while you might feel like it’s your responsibility to help her, it’s really important to realize that you might not be able to do this on your own.

When a friend is depressed or sad, the best thing you can do is just be there for them — it’s that simple. Sometimes all they want is someone to listen to them, so make sure your friend knows you are always there for her. Also, sometimes they just want to get away from their problems. Try cheering up your friend by distracting them with a hilarious story or by doing something fun.

If things are really that bad and you feel totally helpless, it might be time to get someone else involved. Have you seen your BFF’s mom be emotionally abusive to her? If you know for sure that her mom isn’t treating her right, then you should tell a school counselor. You shouldn’t feel like you need to shoulder this on your own because that could cause you to also feel depressed.

The most important thing is that your friend gets help, and knows that you always have her back. Just keep being a great friend, and remember that even if it doesn’t seem like it, that’s going to make her feel better.

WDYT, gURLs? Have you ever had a depressed friend? How did you cheer her up? Share your stories and advice below. take care, heather What’s on your mind? Heather can help! Send her your question at

Posted in: Friends, Help Me Heather, Help&Advice, Sucky Emotions
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  • Sabrina

    i have depression also, and this is absolutely true. You don’t have to cure us, (you can’t), but being there for us, letting us talk about our problems, and definitely distracting us with something fun helps.

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