My boyfriend and I recently had sex and lost our v-cards. The problem is I want to be open with my mom and tell her, but with sex being an oh-so sensitive subject, I don’t know how to bring it up! Do you have any advice?
It may be awkward at first to tell your mom that you lost your virginity, but it’s a great idea to do it. Many parents are able to give advice and information about sex and sexual health that you may not know. Even if the conversation is a little uncomfortable in the beginning, it will (most likely) be a healthy experience that every gURL deserves to have. Good for you for taking the initiative!
Like I told the gURL who needed to tell her mom that she was pregnant, people react to things in different ways. Find a time that’s comfortable for the both of you to start the conversation, when you’re alone and relaxed. Planned Parenthood suggests using a magazine article or TV show as a jumping-off point to start a conversation about sex, or bringing up a friend who’s decided to have sex and see how your mom reacts.
Then, explain that you have something awkward but important that you want to share with her. Let her know how much you value her thoughts and ideas, and that it’s special to you that she’s informed about what’s going on in your life. By letting her know why you’re telling her and that her opinion matters, she’ll see how mature and ready you are for making adult decisions.
You don’t have to go into too much detail — parents know what sex is, after all– just simply explain that you were smart and safe about it and that you used protection (assuming that’s the truth). You can let her know it was with your boyfriend and that you were completely ready for it (again, if that’s truth).
Take it slowly, try not to react to her reaction if it’s negative, and remember that parents never love the idea of their kids growing up. It’s perfectly normal to feel nervous, and keep in mind that a lot of parents say they feel relieved when their kids start the conversation for them.
Good luck! Let me know how it goes.
What about you, gURLs? Do your parents know you’re having sex? How did you tell them? What did they do? Share your stories and advice below!
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