My Ex is Dating a Total Bimbo. How Do I Break Them Up and Get Him Back?

c'mon, she's not that bad!

Dear Heather,

My ex-boyfriend is amazing. He’s perfect in every way and I truly love him. He says he still loves me and talks about how happy we used to be. You would think it would be a no-brainer and we’d just get back together, right? WRONG! He also likes another girl who is completely wrong for him.

She’s a self-centered, spoiled, doesn’t-have-a-mind-of-her-own, Hannah Montana clone! She cries at EVERYTHING. She acts so stupid and clueless so she can get attention — and it worked cause she got the attention of the love of my life. And to make it worse, she tells her friends she doesn’t even like him!! She just keeps him around so she can feel like she is loved.

All I want is for him to be happy, so I do whatever I can to make sure they’re together. I can’t do this anymore. I cry myself to sleep every night because I love him so much and I hate her so much. Please help me make him realize that she’s a bimbo, and help me regain me sanity because it’s slowly ripping my heart into pieces.

I know it hurts to see someone you love be with another person. I’m sorry you have to deal with that. And I’m also sorry to tell you that hating this gURL and calling her a bimbo and crying yourself to sleep probably isn’t going to make your ex break up with her and get back together with you. I know it’s tough to hear, but it’s a reality you have to face if you want to start being happy again.

|Do you have a case of the ex blues? Get relief on the Shout Out Boards.|

While it wouldn’t be fair of this other gURL to date your ex if he doesn’t even like him, it also wouldn’t be okay for your ex to go behind his girlfriend’s back to tell you that he still in love with you. But the thing is, you don’t know for sure if the gURL really is just dating him so that she can feel loved (who told you that? how reliable is that person?), and your ex has only told you that he loves you (read: cares about, likes as a friend). You don’t know what really goes on in their relationship when they’re together and alone, and it’s none of your business what happens between them privately — or at least, it shouldn’t be.

If you’re at the point where you’re crying yourself to sleep and breaking your back over making sure they stay together, it’s time to butt out of their relationship. You’re only torturing yourself at this point. It’s entirely possible that this gURL really isn’t even that bad, and that your jealously (which is a completely normal feeling for you to have right now) is making her (and her relationship with your ex) seem much worse than it actually is. And vice versa: Could it be that your ex isn’t actually perfect and that you’re just building him up in your head? Maybe just a teeny bit?

|Heather helps a gURL who reaaaalllly doesn’t want to be the new kid in school. What would you do?|

Ditch the female competition and all of this suffering-for-your-ex business and go find something (or someone) that actually makes you happy to occupy your time. Your ex and his girlfriend’s relationship will run its course, and if it’s not meant to be, they’ll suffer through it and find out for themselves while you’re off doing thing that don’t make you lose your sanity.

Keep me posted on how it all turns out.

What are your thoughts, gURLs? Have you ever watched your ex be with the wrong girl? How’d you deal? Share your stories and advice below!

take care,
heather

What’s on your mind? Heather can help! Send her your question at heather@gurl.com.

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Posted in: Dating, Help Me Heather, Love Advice, Sucky Emotions, Sucky Emotions
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  • Cunegonde Amedee

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  • Phil Rozzi

    I used to date a complete bimbo in high school. She had the blonde hair, fake tan, fake nails, loud voice, stupid conversations. The only reason I was with her for so long is because she was hot and good in bed but boy was she stupid as a bag of rocks. Any new guy’s that would give her attention she would sleep with and then come crawling back to me. We barely talked for 3 years that we went out because I had nothing to talk about with her. But when she would hang out with her girl friends they would giggle, scream, dance in their cars and talk so loud that it made me want to rip my hair out. Eventually she became pregnant with someone so I never dated her again and let that guy babysit her and the kid, but shoot do I feel sorry for those guy’s with the hot bimbo wives. Everyday when I see them I think that could have been me dealing with all that stupidity.

  • michelle

    My ex-boyfriend dumped me 4 months ago after I accused him of seeing someone else and insulting him.I want him back in my life but he refuse to have any contact with me.I was so confuse and don’t know what to do,so I reach to the internet for help and I saw a testimony of how a spell caster help them to get their ex back so I contact the spell caster and explain my problem to him and he cast a spell for me and assure me of 3days that my ex will return to me and to my greatest surprise the third day my ex came knocking on my door and beg for forgiveness.I am so happy that my love is back again and not only that,we are about to get married.once again thank you ultimate spell.you are truly talented and gifted.Email:ultimatespelltemple@gmail.com is the only answer.he can be of great help and I will not stop publishing him because he is a wonderful man ultimatespelltemple@gmail.com

  • gaticia

    I have been in bondage ever since my ex leave for another woman, It was really hell for me and everybody told me to forget about him but i could not because i love him so much, Things get worse until my friend Gina introduced me to this great spell caster Dr. kuma and i contacted him through his email (ogbologbotemple@gmail.com) i explain everything to him and he cast a spell for me immediately after three days, everything turn around and Paul come to me on his knee begging for forgiveness that i am the one and only woman in his life now. i was surprise i have never seen such a miracle in my life. I am so thankful to this man and i will forever publish his name ogbologbotemple@gmail.com,his mobile number +2347051705853

  • jess

    look however much you hate the girl he is with its not right to break them up,if you truley love him then shouldnt you want him to be happy an dif tat means he isnt with you then just try to be his friend belive it or not i was friends with my boyfriend for 12 years befor we started going out x

  • Miah

    I’m sorry you feel hurt but let me remind you there’s gotta be a reason you broke up and when/ if you get back together that reason will still be there.

  • Kinsey

    Another thing sweetheart, is absence makes the heart grow fonder. I had a similar situation awhile back. A good friend talked to me about it though, and she reminded me that there was a reason we broke up in the first place. Things change, people change, and feelings change. She reminded me of all the times I spent crying because I just wasn’t happy with him anymore. But when we broke up, all I remembered were the good times we had… Sometimes it helps to remember the bad too. Because when I look back now, as much as I still love him and wish him the best, I’m not IN love with him, and I’m glad we’re not together, because we just weren’t meant to be.

  • RobynDawn

    Well..i don't think you should stress over him..he's your EX for a reason..soo you should keep it that way. You'll find someone 100x's better who actually wants to be with you instead if this "bimbo."

  • lily

    well he might come back!! dont be sad!!!=( turn that frown upside down!!=)