How and should I tell my friend with benefits that I want to be more than that? We have been fooling around a little for the last two weeks. Fooling around as in touching each other but we haven’t kissed or anything. We knew each other 3 years before we became friends with benefits. What should I do?
As Henry explained in his friends with benefits post, being FWB with a guy will change your relationship forever. By agreeing to be his no-strings-attached partner, you’ve already established that you’ve got a mutual attraction, which is a good sign about your physical chemistry. But you’ve also agreed to go into hooking up without committing to each other, which could actually make starting an exclusive relationship (meaning just you and him, with no one else on the side) tricky — but not impossible.
Talk to him about it, and tell him you’d like be to closer than just friends who touch sometimes. Since you just started being FWB, it should be easy enough to transition if he has feelings for you, too. But even though you want something more from him, it’s not guaranteed that he feels the same way, especially since he has already said (by agreeing to the FWB) that he wants to touch without the commitment aspect.
And if he says he’s not interested in being more than just friends with benefits, I strongly suggest that you get out of your FWB relationship now before you get hurt. Hooking up with him won’t make him fall for you. It’ll only cause you to fall that much more for him, making it harder to break things off down the road.
I know that sometimes we wish we could be the “cool” gURL who doesn’t need commitment, but it’s perfectly natural and normal to want to be with a person exclusively. If a guy can’t handle that, then he’s not the one for you.
gURLs, do you have a FWB-turned-BF success story? How’d you do it? Share your story below!
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