Henry here, answering questions for you that only a guy can. Between 16 & Pregnant and Teen Mom dominating airwaves, and all the gURLs discussing teen pregnancy on the boards, I thought today’s topic was quite fitting. Ana asks:
Does it really matter to a guy if a girl has a baby? I’m 16 and I have a six month old daughter and I have had a lot of trouble finding a guy that’ll be okay with me being a mother. How can I know whether or not a guy is down with dating a girl with a baby?
Well, Ana, I think in your case it has a lot to do with your age. Most teen guys are all about experimenting. They want to date, kiss, dry-hump, and have sex with as many girls as possible. It’s brutal, I know, and probably the last thing you want to hear, but teen guys see a baby as getting in their way because it cuts into their new-and-improved, post puberty life.
Think about it: For a really young guy who feels like he’s just hit his sexual prime, the thought of a baby becomes a major turn off. Most guys have it in the back of their head that they’ll eventually find a chick, settle down, and maybe even become a father, but in terms of timing, it looks way far down the road.
My advice to you is, for the time being, concentrate on taking care of your baby and being able to support both yourself and your child. You’ll find that as the guys around you get older, it’ll be easier to date. That’s because as guys get older, they become less sex crazed and a little more relationship-oriented, so lots of them will start to overlook that you have a kid. But in the meantime, don’t be surprised if a guy sees it as just another layer of responsibility that he doesn’t really want in a relationship.
And hey, it’s not to say that all young guys will steer clear of you because you’ve had a baby. You’re just going to need to find a special one who is willing to take on that extra responsibility. Silver lining: at least when you find him, you’ll know he’s really got your back and loves you for you.