Henry’s back from the holi-daze and answering the questions you have just for a guy. Today, Diane asks:
“What is the best way to get over someone you were dating who not only cheated on you but was hitting on your friends behind your back? And how do you trust your friends again afterward? I have very conflicting feelings toward them — I still love them as my friends but I feel like I can’t trust them not to steal any guy I like moving forward!”
The ultimate burn. Not only were you wronged by your guy, but your friends aided in the plot. Henry sees this too often, and I have to say, there’s only one good, surefire way to avoid it: Remove your friends from the dating equation.
Sure, dating sucks, and you want to talk about it with your friends. When a guy does you wrong, you want your friends’ shoulders to cry on. When you’re in love, you want your friends to be the ones to tell you to just shut up about him already. It’s pretty obvious to a guy like me that this is how most girls interact with their friends about their love lives.
So, do what I do: follow guy code. Guys don’t talk about their girlfriends until it’s set in stone. You should do the same with any new guy moving forward. If you meet a guy and you really like him, keep him a secret from your friends (just like guys do) until your relationship is set in stone (meaning, until he calls you his girlfriend and makes things “official”). Once this happens, you’ll be able to intro him to your friends without worrying about your friends getting in the way. That’s because when a guy makes things official with you, it means he really wants to be with just you.
Hanging out with your friends and your new guy will seem simple after that. You’ll have established a strong relationship so he’ll only see your friends as just that.
So, what other questions do you have for a guy like me? Share them in the comments and you might just see yours answered soon.