Ask A Guy: How Do I Trust My Friends After They Stole My BF?

we don't suggest "axing" your cheating dude's car, but this is quite funny...

Henry’s back from the holi-daze and answering the questions you have just for a guy. Today, Diane asks:

“What is the best way to get over someone you were dating who not only cheated on you but was hitting on your friends behind your back? And how do you trust your friends again afterward? I have very conflicting feelings toward them — I still love them as my friends but I feel like I can’t trust them not to steal any guy I like moving forward!”

The ultimate burn. Not only were you wronged by your guy, but your friends aided in the plot. Henry sees this too often, and I have to say, there’s only one good, surefire way to avoid it: Remove your friends from the dating equation.

Sure, dating sucks, and you want to talk about it with your friends. When a guy does you wrong, you want your friends’ shoulders to cry on. When you’re in love, you want your friends to be the ones to tell you to just shut up about him already. It’s pretty obvious to a guy like me that this is how most girls interact with their friends about their love lives.

So, do what I do: follow guy code. Guys don’t talk about their girlfriends until it’s set in stone. You should do the same with any new guy moving forward. If you meet a guy and you really like him, keep him a secret from your friends (just like guys do) until your relationship is set in stone (meaning, until he calls you his girlfriend and makes things “official”). Once this happens, you’ll be able to intro him to your friends without worrying about your friends getting in the way. That’s because when a guy makes things official with you, it means he really wants to be with just you.

|But does your crush even know you’re alive? Take this quiz to find out!|

Hanging out with your friends and your new guy will seem simple after that. You’ll have established a strong relationship so he’ll only see your friends as just that.

So, what other questions do you have for a guy like me? Share them in the comments and you might just see yours answered soon.


Posted in: Ask A Guy, Cheating, Help Me Heather, Help&Advice, Love&Sex
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  • Little Miss Excluded

    Hi Henry! So I’ve been dating this guy for over 2 years, we’re really in love and have a great sex life, but he’s always said that he “outgrew” porn some years back. I recently found a new word file on his laptop with a list of porn sites. I don’t have anything against porn but I’m upset that he’s lied to me when I’ve always been so open with him! I’d like to satisfy his every fantasy but being excluded like this makes me think he has a madonna/whore complex, and doesn’t feel good at all! Help?!

  • Jones Goncalves

    So my ex girlfriend came back to town after being in south beach for the last 6 months, we starting going out to eat, spending a lot of time, and sleeping with one another. A month and a half pass by and she tells me she's pregnant. Of course I was shocked and started to think that it was a set up. But I didn't say anything, so she slept over my house last week and a girl named jazmine that I really like called me and she(prego) saw the call and it started a huge argument. I really have feelings for jasmine and would like to be with her but. If the kid that prego is having is mines I would want to be with her what do I do ?

  • Ali

    Dear Henry,

    It seems like all of the guys I have dated with the exception of one are still trying to find themselves. Now I'm cool with that except that I get ignored at school and they are all sweet away from their friends. I get that they don't wanna be all cutesy in front of their buds but why is saying hi to me in the hall so wrong and how do I avoid heartbreak in the future?

    Ali

  • jade

    Dear Henry,

    Hey , i have a bff thats a guy and we flirt and stuff. We're really good friends and friends with benefits have somewhat come up in our conversations. I've thought about being friends with benefits with him, i'm not looking for anything serious but i still want to have fun. He feels the same way. I want to be friends with benefits with him, but i dunno how to bring it up or make it happen. we've also joked about it too, like we have an inside thing where we say we're bffwb.

    • Haha! I had a friend like that.But at the end of the day we got together:P he still loves me but were jst friends now:P xxif u guys r really close just tell him.:P