heyy what will happen if i’m having sex with my boyfriend and he starts speeding up
really fast and wont stop and he is hurting me? what can happen?
Nevermind what can happen (but I’ll get to that in a second)! Why won’t he stop? Is he not listening to you? I’m assuming you asked him, right? Is he hearing impaired? If so, can he not open his eyes to look at your sign language? If he’s not hearing impaired, then he has absolutely NO EXCUSE for hurting you. The fact that he continues to pound you for his selfish pleasure is a HUGE red flag and I’d urge you to think about if he’s really the kind of guy who you should be hooking up with.
I don’t mean to pass judgment, but when you’re in an intimate and vulnerable situation, which sex inherently is, your partner must and ought to immediately listen to any complaints of discomfort. It doesn’t matter if he’s “in the moment” or telling you “it just feels so good.” Nope. Not one bit. While sometimes it’s OK to put up with a little discomfort, this kind of behavior is really ill-spirited and selfish, and not good traits in a partner for the long haul (and I’d even argue for a hookup!).
If he doesn’t stop, he absolutely could damage your vagina by tearing it, bruise your cervix, not to mention make your entire area very swollen, and too-rough-sex can make it hard or painful to pee, make you feel faint, and make you more prone to a yeast infection and UTI. Make sure you pee as soon as you possibly can after rough sex to get any bacteria out of your raw tissue that might make an infection more likely.
Now, for the emotional side effects. If you’re not ready for the kind of sex he wants, it could be traumatizing. It’s not OK for a guy to make you feel subordinate and hurt you in these kinds of situations.
You need to communicate with him when you’re not in the bedroom that you would like to take sex slower, and be sure to have lubrication handy. While that won’t take the pain of him hitting your cervix away, it can help with rawness. I’d recommend you gradually work towards the speedy sex he wants, but in general, I think you should take the lead and not let him take advantage of you. And if he doesn’t listen to you? Done-zo. You don’t need a dude like that.
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