Ask a Guy: What Condom Brand Should I Use?

Today I’m back answering your guy questions, and Sammie says: “When my boyfriend and I have sex we want to be safe and use condoms, but we just don’t like how they feel! Is there a certain brand that feels better than others?”

|Hold up, do you even know how to use a condom? Get the fast facts now!|

First off, I’m so happy to hear you and your dude want to be safe. It really scares me sometimes looking through the boards and seeing some of you gURLs aren’t using protection with your guys (totally not cool because most of us don’t want to end up a baby daddy, so wrap it up!).

But just as one guy’s junk is not equal to another’s, neither are condoms for that matter. From my limited glances around the locker room (and trust me, I’m not spending a lot of time checking out packages on other guys), man parts come in all shapes and sizes. Some of them have extra pieces of skin even.

|Want to know more about the guys that do get snipped?|

So really, no, there is no brand of condom I could recommend that would feel better than another. It’s definitely specific to your guy, because the kind I might like, he might hate, and vice versa.

My best advice: Go crazy and try out a new brand every time you have sex until you find the brand you really love. And do some digging online. You can often order a trial condom online from some of the bigger brands (although it might be a little embarrassing if mom finds that in the mail!). The most important thing is that you should always use some form of birth control. So if the two of you have exhausted every brand on the pharmacy shelves, maybe you can try out the female version or start talking about the pill (that is, of course, if you’ve been tested for STDs).

So, got any more questions from me? Throw them my way via the comments.



This entry was posted in Ask A Guy, Help Me Heather, Help&Advice, STDs & STIs.
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  • my guy loves trojans

  • Mila

    Has no one ever considered the fact that sometimes boys just strike conversation for the sake of talking? I understand that it could come off as flirting but hey, girls are just as guilty. Sometimes flirting with someone doesn't necessarily mean you like them. You might like the attention and you might like the ego-boost. Or you might just like talking to females . a lot . I like to talking to boys but that doesn't mean I every, individual one of them.

  • Erica

    Yes I know I am confusing..but all my problems are now solved!:) wer still gunna have sex but wer gunna use a condom to prevent the pregnancy:) I talked to him and he agreed with me and now tha plan of having the baby is on hold!:) thanx for the advice guys!:)

  • Erica

    ok so I have a pretty big problem nd I need advice fast…

    Ok so my boyfriend wants to have a baby nd well I kinda do too. He even proposed to me…nd I said yes….we were so happy we even started thinkin of names for our future baby… Idk wht I

    Should do. I wanna make him happy…but there's one thing that is holding me

    Back….my parents….but especially my dad… My dad told me straight up

    That if I got pregnant he would kick me out of the house nd forget he even

    Had a doughter he just said he would straight out forget about me and my future baby..I wanna make my parent proud but I also wanna have

    The baby…I wanna go to collage nd be a doctor…but idk want to do

    Lastime I told my boyfriend we should wait till we'r 18 so my parents wouldent be sayin shit..but I really don't know want to do…..plz I need urgent advice!! (Ohh nd by the way my me nd my boyfriend are both 15yrs old)

    • Candi

      Hun, you are 15 years old and you have your whole life ahead of you. And at your age, you shouldn't be thinking about having children. No one should have a baby unless they have the financial stability & maturity. And I promise, at 15, even if you seem mature, you're not ready for it. Pregnancy is portrayed as a happy little walk in the garden, but trust me: it's no field day. It takes a lot of patience, sacrifice, time, and money. At 15, you don't know if you're even going to be with this guy for the rest of your life. If you two do love each other, you can wait until it's right. 15 years old, isn't right. Not for anyone.

      • Erica

        Thank you that's very good advice:)

        But last tune I told him we should wait to have the baby he just go mad at me..and well I don't like it when he gets mad at me. And especially now because he has some health problems. I just feel like he's pressuring me into having the baby..I mean he proposed to me..nd now we are engaged..but I don't know how to tell him tha we should wait to have the baby…I mean evert time I try and tell him he starts to get mad and starts to tell me that I just don't want the baby that I don't care bout it..but I do want the baby and I do care…I just wanna wait until we'r 18 so our parents can't say anything….he also wants me to move in with him…but I convinced him why I tha problem is out of the way…..ok so how should I tell him we have to wait…without makeing him mad or how can I say it nicely. Or should I just have unprotected sex and then buy a "plan b" thingy…or should I take birth control pills…if I take birth controll pills how am I going to tell my mom I need them? She doesent even know I am going to become sexually active….plz help me!:(

        • Melissa

          Sweetie, if your boyfriend is pressuring you into something you don't want to do, then maybe he isn't the right guy for you. If you guys haven't had sex yet, he could just be saying he wants a baby in order to get you into bed. If that's not the case, and you guys are truly in love and plan to get married, then he should be happy to wait. And you should be happy to wait too, because it's your body that's going to be affected, and your life that's going to be changed. A baby isn't going to solve any problems, such as making your boyfriend stop being mad at you. If anything, it could make it worse, especially with all the costs a baby comes with. Also, becoming a doctor is a great goal, and it would be a lot easier to earn a degree first, and then raise a family. I wish you luck, and I hope you remember that you and your future family are worth the wait πŸ™‚

    • Brianna

      Ummmm….NOOO! Is my answer to this question. Being pregnant is HARD, not just when it comes but the nine months prior to this. I'm speaking from experience hun. I'm 17 & got pregnant [we weren't trying to] Unfortunately I lost my baby at 22weeks pregnant due to preterm labor. I'm pretty sure that with you & your boyfriend being 15 neither of you have a job…so how do you plan to provide for this baby…with love?….I think not. Babies are expensive, NOT play things. Honestly if I don't feel like you guys should even be having sex if you're considering this, it shows your age & irresponsibility. I'm sorry if I'm coming off like a b*tch but sometimes tough love is needed.

      • Erica

        Ok well thank you:) but now that I think of it..I kinda wanna have the baby now. Every time I think about the baby it makes me get all warm and fuzzy inside. My boyfriend plays for a soccer team and get payed..and if I need money for the baby, well just use his money. But if we need more well ask my uncles (their in this big business nd get payed alot!) fir some money. And if they don't wanna give us any then I'll tell my boyfirend to ask his cuzin for some money(his cuzin and my uncles are in the same type of business) and we already planed for me to move in wit him nd his parents. Even tho I live in a wayyy different city from him. I think im goin to go live wit him. I'm just a little scared if wht my parents will say..I mean I know tha my mom will call the cops tha I'm missing or if my dad finds out I'm pregnant..he told me streight up that he will kick me out of the house and forget everythin bout me…I'm just scared tha my dad will get really really mad tha he'll shoot nd kill my boyfriend (my dad loves hunting) ok now I'm really scared. Crap!! Now I really don't know wht to do..I wanna have my baby..but I don't wanna disappoint my patents…ugh!! I kinda just want someone to tell me wht to do cuz I dont know wht to do anymore!!:(

        • Lisa

          I'm sorry Erica but if you have this baby now it will be the stupidest decision in your life. Your entire plan for your life is based on other people. Other people's money, other people's home, and I hate to say it but the way that your are thinking and posting to other people shows even though you are 15 you still have the maturity and self awareness of a 13 year old. I'm 21 hun, A LOT of things change in those years. A LOT. and NO baby should ever be had solely based on "warm fuzzy feelings" I can't even begin to tell you how naive thinking that is. Stabilize your life, get your education so you can work a decent job to support this baby, ENJOY YOUR TEENAGE YEARS, move out then do what you want girl. If you don't think you can wait that long then you know for sure that you are not ready for this baby. Because that baby is forever and when you have it becomes YOUR life. Not something IN your life, it becomes your ENTIRE life. And I think you are still living in too much of a fantasy and drama world to deal with that. And if he can't either then I'm sorry but he is not ready to be a dad.

          This your life girl, don't be reckless. You only get one take at life.

          • Serena

            I completely agree with the poster above me. Erica, it sounds like you haven't an idea what you'd be getting into, sure babies are cute, but what about the diaper changes, the 3am feedings, the constant crying? The idea of motherhood is being way overglamourized. I'm not saying it's bad, but seriously. YOU'RE 15, at that age, most teens still need their parents assistance; and if that's the case, how would a baby factor in? In addition, you say you'd get money from family members in a business, or in worst case, a cousin. If that's your mentality, to freeload (harsh, yes, but true.) then you seriously need to reconsider what you want. What about when the baby comes? Do you think a 15 year old guy is going to want to raise a child? No, he's going to want to live his life, which is what you should be doing. Lastly, college would be near impossible to deal with, and dropout rates are WAY higher once a kid is in the picture.

            Think this through, please; you only get your youth once

        • ophelia

          Erica, I really advise that you don't have the baby because at 15, it will definitely be hard to find a job that will earn you enough money to care for a kid, and I also think that it will be really hard to start your own family while you are so young, without any help or support from your own family. I don't mean to come off rude or harsh, but you would be throwing away your relationship with your parents for this baby, and what would happen if, for example, your boyfriend/fiancee broke up with you? Also, I was kind of wondering, how old is this guy?! Because you seem a little young to be moving in and getting married with your boyfriend. I know you probably already have been, but please think things through carefully. If your boyfriend is not willing to wait, there is a chance that he is not going to respect you enough in your relationship in the future. I advise that you tell your boyfriend you won't have the baby until you're 18. If he won't respect that, I think it's time to find a guy who will respect your choices and won't pressure you.

          • Erica

            Thanx guys:)

            But here's whts happening….I already told him once tha we wernt gonna have tha baby. Nd then he got mad..therm I told him we were gunna have tha baby nd he got hella happy:) but then again I told him tha we wernt gunna have it…then he told me.."yu knoe wht..if we'r nah gunna have tha baby just tell me so I don't get my hopes high anymore" nd I told him we were gunna have tha baby…he told me he had a BIG feeling tha I didint wanna have tha baby yet…nd well I don't…well not right now…so all I ask is for help on how I should tell him I don't wanna have tha baby yet….I wanna get my future ready for me nd my husband nd future baby:)

            Plz give me advice!

          • Deja'Le

            Erica,seriously your 15,and you wanna throw your whole life down the drain for some boy,cause you don't want him to be mad at you? stop trying to please everybody else,and maybe consider only pleasing yourself, thats ridiculous,especially when a person whos younger than you has to inform you. (i'm 14.) your supposed to be an example to the younger generation. I'm mean its your life,do what you want but you cant say no one warned you,cause people did. I'm not trying to be mean,but its kinna irritating seeing that your asking for advice,people offer you advice,and you don't really consider it. your confusing.

          • Lindsay

            I'm sorry but are you serious, Erica? I have a feeling this just a way for you to seek attention. You're clearly not mature enough if you think popping out a baby, borrowing peoples money, living in your boyfriends house and finishing high school, university etc. with a baby is going to a breeze. School is already stressful enough, nevermind a child on the side. Also, Melissa brought up a good point. Maybe your boyfriend just really wants to have sex. Obviously, this would be the better option but not the best option. Even at 15, losing your virginity is a big deal but if you're willing to please so desperately then go for it. Ask him what he really wants, lay sex out on the table and if you think he's really worth it (clearly, he's not due to the unhealthy amount of pressuring) then so be it. Maybe that's all he really wants. If not and turns out he actually wants the child then go ask him to go find another to have a baby with. You have a great future and plan ahead of you and I guarantee you that carrying a baby along will not help you reach this goal anytime soon. What do you want more? To be a mother at the age of 15 or to be a doctor at the age of 28? Your choice. Just remember, you can't have the cake and eat it.

  • Alisha

    i have been with my boyfriend for 5 years and he is the love of my life, and we are going to get married. But during the past year i have fallen in love with two other guys…the one i drove out of my way all the time to see…and nothing happened not even a kiss, but there was deff. a spark. and the second guy is my best friends ex. and i love him and want to do stuff with him but always hold back cuz i am with my boyfriend…and the worst part is that both of these other guys know my boyfriend, and know we have been together a long time and that i have known him since i was three…and i know if i took a break with my current boyfriend then he would never talk to me again…but i rele wanna try out other guys…i have been with my current boyfriend since i was 13 and he was my first kiss, first time having sex, first everything!! and my only real boyfriend!!! what should i do? follow my heart and break up with him for guys that i know are not gonna be as faithful or my head and stay with him like everyone expects me to?

    • hotchick390

      think it through, i know trying to do what everyone else expects is tempting, but listening to yr heart has always worked for me πŸ™‚

    • Kim

      i agree with hotchick390. think it through. i was with my ex boyfriend for 3 years since i was 15. he was my first everything too and i loved being him but i wanted to get out and see other guys. people were telling me to stay with him but my heart was saying no. it was tough to do but after i thought about it, i broke up with him. it ended up working out for the better. dont listen to what other people tell you, you follow your own heart and do what you think will be better for you. πŸ™‚

      • Lindsay

        You clearly don't love your first boyfriend if you have this much doubt. Sort out your goddamn priorities and attempt to stay emotionally faithful. No one said it would be easy but don't go throwing around the word "love" so worthlessly then. If you don't love him and you want the two other guys, break up with him (because it's not fair for him at all) and then you'll have a new problem: choosing between the guys. Or stay with your boyfriend that you claim you love and forget about the rest. To be honest, it could just be curiousity mixed with confusion and lust. As you said, you just want to "do stuff with them".

  • Yvonne

    Durex all the way. Trojan is too smelly although they are great! I've never had one tear, I just hate the smell becuase I can feel it hours after I've had sex.

  • Kiya

    Okay its this guy that i really like and he like me back and he want to have sex with me but i dont kno if i should or shouldnt give me advice

    • Ashley

      You shouldn't, at all! I'm guessing your a teen, as for having sex with him you shouldn't because most guys want that only at the age you are and they'll say anything just to make you have sex with them.

      • Agreed. Teens are at their most vulnerable at this age, and we need to be cautious to sleeping and such. You don't want to get get preggers off the guy who pressured you into sex. Besides, having sex, even if it's not your first time, is something special. You don't want to be one of those girls who is like, "Yeah, I slept with him, whatever." Those girls are real sluts. Take your time, it's your choice, it's not like he can force you to WANT to do it!

        • RealSlut

          i'd be one of those girls. and i would not call myself a slut. everytime i've slept with a guy i've known his full sexual history, i'm on the pill, and i ALWAYS use condoms. the only time you shouldn't have sex is if your unsure or nervous. It is better to wait for something special but even if it is special you shouldn't do it if your not 100% sure.

          and some people just dont put as much emotional value into sex. i dont. if you do thats great but i would not make judgements about people who are comfortable with their sexuality or just plain sexual. i don't sleep with guys to get them off. i sleep with them because its what i want. i didn't sleep with anyone until i felt a truely loved MYSELF and if you don't love your self (personality, body, hair, teeth EVERYTHING) then you shouldn't have sex.

    • kyla

      no, dont have sex with any guy you arent going out with and if you are going out with him wait for like 3 or 2 mouths and see if he still stays with you even tho you didnt have sex yet, ( forplays okay) ,, The point is if you really like him and if you want to go out with him , dont have sex, bc once that happends hes not going to want to go out with you , hes going to want to use you , bc he knows once you do it once he could do it anytime , and there wouldnt be a reson to go out with you, but if hes a nice guy, maybe, but if hes the one asking out to have sex , you know hes not as nice as he seems, belive me i know…

  • kelsey

    I'm Kelsey, I'm an 8th grader and last year my best friend's bf called me and said"hey can i come over and bang u?"

    I forgot that he was my bff's bf that time. He made me horny and he came over, we had sex in my parents bedroom and he spread a rumor about this whole thing and now my bff hates me. Give me advice?

    • Kiya

      well whats done is done and you cant stop it but try to work things out with your friend make her understand but at the end of the day if she doesnt like you youll have to move on

    • Oh wow πŸ™ sorry about that. Guys are stupid. Situations like this suck. These two girls who were friends in my old school had this thing for this one guy. The one guy totally went behind their backs, pretending that he was in love with them, and would use them both for sex and go behind their backs to get sexual things done to him. They went around telling everyone they were sleeping and dating with him, and then finally one person was like, "No, that OTHER girl is dating him," and then it took a few hours to find out what was going on. They didn't remain friends but weren't mean to each other. They stopped dating him. They just moved on with their lives and found more safe, better friends.

      • Tina

        Kiya's right, what's done is done. I guess this is what you get for "forgetting" the boy you just slept with is your best friend's boyfriend.

  • Daley

    I have a best guy friend that I hang out with all the time, and we are super close, but he says he is in love with me, and I don't feel that way for him. We have kissed a couple of times, after which I always feel nothing but guilt. He recently told me he had been hoping we could try dating and maybe sometime I'd eventually feel a spark, but I know that won't happen. How do I keep him from holding out all his hopes on me? I don't want him to get hurt when I start dating someone I do like that way. Is it too hard on him for me to just be friends?

    • Shauna

      I think you should tell him how you feel, and if he still wants to talk to you and be friends, he will. Guys do get jealous easily, but so do girls. If you confront him about just wanting to be good friends, I'm sure he'll understand.

    • Jackie Rodriquez

      I think you should put all your judgements behind you and just go for it. I mean what do you have to lose?

      • A great friendship could be lost…Daley should just tell him she wants to keep a friendship and not enter a relationship. The easiest way out is to quickly find a guy you like and maybe your friend will get the hint.

    • kyla

      same thing is going on with me , and i did try going out with him 2 times , but i just didnt feel anything, soo it was kinda over and its been 5 years and he still likes me i kinda feel bad bc i dont feel the same about him, but he keep saying he going to move to all these places and when i ask hes friends they all just say "hes only saying that to get you back", soo that didnt help and everytime i talk to him he goes on about alll theas girls and what not to get me back im guessing but its not helping, soo i say just do what i do , keep talking to him and what not but if he brings it up just say something like im not ready and im not sure bc i dont want to change what we already have , (friendship) ,, and when you start likeing a guy just stop talking to him for some time and when you go out with the guy you like , just tell your friend that i trying getting a hold of you but couldnt , so i just did it, (i know its mean but still, you dont want to hurt him right ?)

  • Maya

    I had sex with a boy i use to date a while aqo and he messes around with tons of qirls. When i had sex with him for the first time it wasn't special and i really wanted it to. He promised me he would make it special but instead he ended up qoinq with my bestfriend. He told me he loves me and promises that if anythinq happenes with them that he'll qet back toqether with me. I don't know if i can trust him but i really want to belive him. Should i wait or just qo ahead and move on??

    • Shannon

      I thing you need to move on guys that are like that are ones u dont need around trust me iv been threw it and ended up really sad and depressed about how he was treating me.

    • Lilly

      if this is true, he doesnt deserve you. You wanted it to be something special and he just threw it all back in your face by going with your bestfriend. You don't need a guy like that. I know someone who spent years on a guy she loved and the whole time he didn't even notice her or what he was doing to her feelings. Don't turn into one of those people. If he really loved u he would not have got with your friend, or alt the least break up with her now xx

      • Shauna

        I have to say, I agree with Lilly 100%. If this guy loved you enough, to not be with other girls, he wouldn't. If he breaks up with this girl, I don't recommend going after him again… Like they say, there are plenty of fish in the sea, and you'll eventually find a guy that treats you right and knows how to respect you!

  • Kayla

    trojan fire&ice

    one of my favorite condoms(;

    • Jackie Rodriquez

      All fire and no ice!

  • Miah Stone

    my ex got another girls phone number while we were going out and rang her up and text her

    he cheeted on me with the same girl

    he swears at me in each argument we had

    but i still like him…….no scratch that i LOVE him! i doo SO much!

    end of the argument hed always say stuff like…'i am sorry, you are my world babe' and id instantly forgive him

    he addmits when hes in the wrong

    he was my first kiss

    we lasted for 6 and a half months when we first went out and its been on and off since!

    we started dating again one thursday and he said he loved me and i loved him back truely no lie i ment it!

    the next day he text me these exsact words

    'hey baby, how r u? i love you yeah? me+you=forever!' and i believed him. i got an email by a friend who is both of our firend saying these exsact words.

    'babe i dont no who to tell u dis but.. miles is moving to margate tonight πŸ™ im sorry he told me to tell you coz he told me its too painful 4 him 2 tell u. he also said he cried when he found out and he told me not to tell u dat .. sorry'

    its been a month now and i want to no how to win him bk and how to settle a LONG disstance relationship. advice? should i just move on? – Miah

    • Kiara

      Aww , Im Sorry That Happened. I Personally Dont Like Long Distance Realtionships, But If You Love Him As Much As You Say. Then Try It Out, If It Doesnt Work Move On As Slowly, But Easily As Possible. Dont Sit Around Mopping Or Being Depressed Because It Really Doesnt Help None. Trust Been There, Done That. If He Really Loves You Like He Says He Does He Would Contact You. & Still Think About You. & When You Contact Him Pick Up Instantly, You Should Be Able To Hear His Smile. AHe Wouldnt Mind Having A Long Distance Relationship If He Loves You Either. Im 15, & Already I Know To Much About Pain & Love From A Boy. Just Know Dont Beat Yourself up Over It. Let Him Know How You Feel, & See How He Feels . & Go From There.

    • He's immature. People that are immature should not be having sex or be in a relationship. It's destined for failure.

      • Tina

        Oh man, I second that.

    • Lemme tell you my story; I was in this super long, wonderful relationship. He was so amazing to me. He was sweet, nice, caring, and just wanting to be around me all the time, even when he was around his best friends, he told me he always misses me. He never pressured me for sex, either (although we did have sex, but it was on my own time, and I was 100% ready)

      One day he came to me and was like, "I'm moving. In six weeks. My parents just told me." I was so sad and depressed that I actually spent everyday after school staying in my bed room and not leaving even for eating time. My parents had to actually bring my food upstairs due to how bedridden I was about him moving. I talked to him and he was as depressed as I was. We clung to each other's sides during school and did NOT want to leave at all.

      Then the day came where he had to move to Seattle and I was so sad. I cried after he left. We promised a long distance relationship. I lived all the way in Annapolis, MD and he lived all the way over in Seattle, WA! I had no idea how we'd work it out. After a few weeks, we called the quits. I found a newer guy I failed to notice when I was distracted by my boyfriend, and my long-distance boyfriend confessed to me he thinks he's found someone he likes himself. I was sad at first, but then me and this new guy started something and now we're dating <3

      My other guy I still keep in touch with. He's dating that new girl, and their really happy together, just like I was too. I even video chatted with them and we got to meet each other's hubbies! It was so cute! I sometimes IM & video chat one-on-one with his new girlfriend. She's really sweet, and she's very nice. Their perfect for each other.

      All I'm saying is find someone else, like I did. Keep a good-friends area with this other guy. I know it sucks but it cant last FOREVER. Soon enough, you'll be hanging with your new BF and your ex-BF will be with some other girl he's making happy/sad (LOL) but find something to keep you off him, whether it's a new boyfriend or a new video game, find something. Hope I helped <3

  • Brittany

    Dear Henry,

    What would be your advice to a girl like me who when is with her boyfriend and is really sexually attracted to him and wants to do stuff with him like not full blown sexual intercourse but other fun stuff but she made a promise to herself that she wouldn't. It is so hard to say no to him because if i say no he gets kinda pissy and doesn't really understand. usually he understands but some other times he gets mad. I am also worried if i don't give it to him he will go else where… Advice? Plz.

    • Josie

      if he is willing to look elsewhere, then hes not worth your time. I finally found somebody who is okay with not getting any cuz hes more of a cuddle type anyway. Thats what he told me. I've asked him to cut back on the sexual stuff cuz I'm having issues with my lady parts. "i believe theres more to a relationship then just sex." yes my boyfriend said that. So try finding other stuff to do, go for a drive, go to a coffeehouse, tjmaxx. And try your hardest to not give in or make things hot and heavy to begin with.



    • Miah Stone

      if your not ready just tell him and he may understand

      if he doesnt understand then mabey hes not the right guy for you

      but it depends what the promise is.

      want to have it with the right guy mabey?

      i dont know

      but its always good to stick to promises.

      if you say no and he does 'go somewhere else' then dump him girl!

      he obviously doesnt care for you feeling and for you if he does x

      hope i helped x

    • Kayla

      if he cant acept you for who yhu are den id sayy forget his if he really likes u then he will understand..and all guys want something more then a me…he might move on..and if he does..he's not worth it..but i suggest to talk to him next time..and be like i really like you and all but you gotta let me do me

    • Kia brown

      hunnie that nikka can halla at me so i can beat his a## for5 asking that type of s###

  • justice

    flirting tips for gURLs? a lot of gURLs have given me tips but i want to hear some from a guy.

    • Flirting is something that comes natural. Flirting isn't really a technique, like people say it is. It's about making the guy your with feel comfortable, like he's somewhere he can be himself. Giggle at his jokes, make jokes at him, compliment him and ask frequently romantic stuff, like if he's single or if he'd ever be free to get some coffee. It's more fun, not complicated. Hope I helped πŸ˜€

  • Dear Henry,

    I have this guy friend who is like a brother to me. He was in an on-off relationship with my best girlfriend who is like my sister. I've been stuck in between there little tiffs ever since August ( when they started dating). I know a long time. I love them both, but I found out through my sister that he called it quits and when she poured her heart, he just said okay like it was nothing. I asked him what was wrong with him, he said he still loves her, but he can't take the long distance (he lives in chicago and she lives in boston). Should I give him time to tell me how he really feels, or should I quit befriending him?

    • someonewithknowledge

      maybe he just feels like he cant be there enough for her. and how is quiting befriending him any better than what he did to her?

      • Jackie Rodriquez

        Yes mam. I so agree! It's the truest words

  • lfdk;sajf;

    how do i know if a guy is gay?

    • Miah Stone

      the guy wears tight clothes

      always stairs at other guys 'private' parts

      clothes are a bit feminine

      says word like 'you go girlfriend' <– i have previous memories :L

      lots more things

      hope i helped x

      • Jessii Moxxie

        Uhm, Miah, That was very rude. You can't just tell if a guy is gay by what he says or wears. You can wear whatever you want, no matter what your sexuality is.

        Please thinks before you say things like that. That was VERY insulting an d stereotypical of you to say.

    • The majority do tend to look feminine because of the clothes they wear, applying makeup, or even their personality. Some guys are metrosexual and not homosexual; it's hard to tell which, sometimes. There are some that seem like typical guys, though. Hopefully your gaydar starts to build soon.

    • Hard to tell these days with all the metrosexual guys walking around today. Now, you can be straight and still wear tight pants and feminine-type clothes (v-necks, tight shirts) but normally the guy will not be as perverted as most guys are, and won't be a sexual and have a sexual-like tention towards you. Eyeliner is NOT a way to tell, because lots of straight guys wear dark eyeliner (God knows why?) but what pisses ME off is that guys will copy their styles yet they'll still use phrases like "that's so gay" or something. Hasn't ANYONE seen the Hilary Duff commercials?!

  • Rhube

    Japanese condoms are highly recommended, as they are thinner, but quite strong. Things like: Kimono (Which come in large, as well)

    Or, I believe Trojan has a fairly new natural feel one. I've used it, but on a toy, so I don't know if it actually feels any better.

    Aslo, maybe you'd like to try the Reality condom? (Female condom) Maybe he'd be more comfortable if it's not him wearing it.

    Also, look for polyurethane condoms. They're more expensive, but transfer heat better than latex, so it does feel a fair bit better. I've used polyurethane gloves for sex before, so I know you can really tell the difference. It's almost like it's not there.

    Also, for a better feel, and for safer sex always use lots of lube.

    And not just lubricated condoms. (Plus, you can't count on the lube used on condoms, as it may contain glycerin, which can cause yeast infections.) Also, spermicide contains nonoxonyl 9, which dries up everything, and can cause the condom to break, so it's best not to use spermicidal lubricated condoms.

    Just make sure to get a glycerin-free lubricant. They're not commonly available at drug stores, which is the downside. But a silicon-based lube will last you longer, and generally have fewer bad ingredients.

    Anyway. :/

  • Laura

    Why is it that when guy's have feelings for a girl they sometimes refuse to admit it to them and run away from the situation?

    • They fear rejection. Guys tend to have a bigger pride. It might be the testosterone…

  • Diane

    Dear Henry,

    What do you think is the best way to get over someone you were dating who not only cheated on you but was hitting on your friends behind your back? And how do you learn to trust your friends again afterwords because I have very conflicting feelings toward them I still love them as my friends but I feel like they want to steal every boyfriend I get from now on I know he was the one that liked them but he did date one of my friends he was hitting on before me so especially with her I feel like she was trying to get him back I know or at least have been told that she doesnt but yet they still talk and hangout and I really really liked him so I'm pretty jealous of her and my other friend he was hitting on which was/is my bestest friend who is like my twin but because of his actions I feel like I can't trust them anymore and like they too stabbed me in the heart because they knew he was hitting on them & didnt tell me at the time they told me what had happened months after me & him broke up because he was flirting with me again & finally they told me not to and explained why because they hadn't before. And sorry this is so long!

    Thanks and hope you can help me! πŸ˜€

    • Kae

      Omg i have the EXACT same problem!! but i was talking with this boy and we really liked eachother but then out of nowhere he gets a girlfriend!! That must mean he was talking to her while talking to me and i can understand his mother doesnt want him dating older girls but he didnt even tell me! And i dont know if he asked her out or she was the one who asked him out cuz he is desperate for the action (not sex) but i think it was the girl cuz she didnt like me in the first place cuz the kid and i were talking so my other guess would be that she askd him out and is now rubbing it in my face that she was crushing on him fist. We havnt spoken since and i dont know if he'll ever tell me or ill have to confront sad bc i still have strong feelings for him and cant get over that. Just sharing. Same problem kinda..

      • that sucks

      • Brooke

        I liked this guy and he ACTED like he was in to me. We would flirt and sit next to each other then walk together. We texted alot and we chatted on face book all the time. After I told him i sorta had a crush on him he stopped texting me stopped talking to me and now its at the point where when I text him he says he doesnt care and stops. I dont know what I did wrong! Is he guarding his heart? Because he acted like that after I told him I liked him.

        • Jessica

          Brooke, he probably liked you as a good friend & cared about you a lot. maybe now he feels kinda weird, just don’t text him or call him anymore, if he really likes you he will realize hat he is doing & he will look for you by him self & text you(: