so uncool: this guy i like flirts with everyone. how can i get only his attention?

dear heather,
There’s this guy I really like and I think he might like me back, but the problem is he’s a HUGE flirt (and that’s the nice way of putting it.) He flirts with me, but he also flirts with other girls too. Most girls say they have better relationships with him when they’re not going out with him. I tried dating him before and it didn’t work out thanks to my supposed “friend,” but I really like him and I don’t know what to do.

Sometimes people are just flirty. It’s doesn’t mean anything; it’s just their personality, kind of like how some people are “shy” or “fun-loving.” But if this dude is hitting on tons of different girls, that’s a serious sign that he’s not the right guy for you. Flirting can, of course, be a sign that he’s into you, but if he’s doing it with everyone he’s probably more interested in quantity that quality.

You mention that lots of girls have said that he’s better as a friend than a boyfriend, and that’s definitely not something you should overlook. Go ahead and flirt with him for fun, but if you’re looking for someone serious, look somewhere else. If you can’t move on that easily, talk to him! Tell him you’re interested, and see how he reacts. If he seems into you, let him know his incessant flirting (with everyone else!) bothers you. And if he doesn’t seem into you, well, at least now you know.

take care,

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