how can i figure out my sexuality?

dear heather,
I like boys… a lot. I have forever, but recently I have been seeing girls in a different way. I don’t know if I’m straight, bisexual, or a lesbian. I have never even kissed a boy (or a girl) before. There is no one bisexual or lesbian at my school, at least I think there’s not. What do I do to find out my sexuality?
If you have always liked boys and you’re starting to get those same butterflies-in-your-stomach feelings about gURLs, there’s a good chance you’re bisexual. And that’s totally OK. You might not know of anyone who is bisexual or gay at your school right now, but a lot of teenagers aren’t comfortable “coming out” until later in life.

For now, don’t get caught up with labels. Maybe you’re interested in both sexes right now, and maybe you’ll just like gURLs in a few months. Maybe you’ll like boys after that, or maybe you’ll never like boys again. Who knows? It’s normal to go through stages of experimentation, and it’s normal to not know exactly who you like.

The important thing is to go easy on yourself and understand that lots and lots of gURLs are going through the exact same thing at this very moment (really!).

take care,

send in your questions for heather to oh, and how can you tell whether you’re into boys or gURLs… or both? share below!

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Posted in: Help Me Heather, Love Advice, Sex, Sex
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  • Becky

    I’m going through the same thing right now, so you’re not alone. Thanks for asking this question, I was always scared to.

  • Taylor

    I’m bisexual and proud! 😀

    • Courtney

      Im Lesbian and I am proud 🙂

  • bekah

    I believe in pansexuality.

    Go with your feelings and try not to dwell on the whole gender thing.

  • Well, i think all you can do is really consider your feeling towards boys and girls. I went through the same thing when i was 12(ik super young :P) but i didnt jump into saying i was this or that. But dont worry ypu'll find peoole maybe friends who are gay, lesbian, or bisexual.