i hate my mom’s new boyfriend

dear heather,

My mom just recently found herself a boyfriend. My mom and I
are usually really close but all of a sudden whenever her
boyfriend comes over she completely blows me off! They go out
and take forever, they go watch movies my mom and I were
supposed to watch together, and she even serves him dinner before
me! Imagine my embarrassment when I invited a friend
over and when we walked over to the living room, she was all up
on him making out! I get it that my mom needs
someone special in her life again, but how do I tell her I just
don’t like the guy?

It’s definitely hard seeing your mom being with someone who isn’t your dad, and it’s totally normal to feel a little jealous and angry towards the new guy in her life. But if your mom is choosing him over you, which it seems like she may be doing, you need to speak up and voice your concerns with her.

You said you two are close, so you should have no problem broaching the topic with her. Tackle the subject the same way you would if your BFF were ditching you for her boyfriend. Let her know that you think she favors him over you and that you love her and want to spend as much time together as you used to. There’s no way that she won’t understand, because you’re her daughter, and odds are she wants to hang out with you, too. And don’t be afraid to let her know that it embarrasses you when they’re all over each other, especially when you have friends over. It’s not appropriate for anyone’s parents to be doing that, ever.

However, you’re going to need to do your part as well and not write off the new boyfriend right away. Do you just not like him as a person, or do you not like him because you feel like he’s taking your mom away from you? I bet that this guy isn’t as bad as you think, so give him a shot and then you, your mom and him can all hang out together so your mom won’t have to “choose” between you and him.

take care,

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  • Ena

    I agree with you,I really hate my mom’s boyfriend.My mom had a lot of boyfriends and i am sick of it.This time,my mom dated this guy and he might be kind and funny but deep down there he is a sh*t and he’s crazy.He just insulted my mom in the phone and he is grrrrr he makes me wanna smack him with a chair.Now,i am expecting my mom to come home but maybe she is really going to he’s place (kind of far from here) and i am just alone here in our house.I get that all of our moms need somebody so when they get older and we get to move out they won’t be alone…but they also need to take care of us.Moms are sooo crazy at love….well its horrible! I just want my mom back.They keep on breaking up but they’re back together again (like the other boyfriends)..I wish that they would break up!

  • kendall

    dude my mom is a bitch has a bf that she has been dating for 9 years and i have hated him the whole time and she knows she says she isnrt dating him any more and goin out with someone else but he still comes over and stays for weeks at a time i think hes using her because we ive closer to the bar he works at but i got over it and so can u